How do you feel about flirting | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

How do you feel about flirting

when I've flirted in the past people who I really like stop talking to me. Now, that's partially because when I did flirt with said person they were already in a relationship, but I really couldn't help it. They have to break up at some point. Right?
 
slant said:
when I've flirted in the past people who I really like stop talking to me. Now, that's partially because when I did flirt with said person they were already in a relationship, but I really couldn't help it. They have to break up at some point. Right?
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lol
 
I flirt, not necessarily that I'm proud of it either. Mostly because I like to make people feel good about themselves but I sometimes overdo it and they end up thinking that I like them, which 99% of the times I do not. If I meet someone I like I will be a complete ass not because I want to but because I can't handle my emotions very well so I end up leaving abruptly by their presence, something really really rude.
 
Eurgh...flirting...I never know what I'm supposed to say. It depends for me on the situation. If I really like someone I tend to just try and make them laugh and maybe make a point of inviting them to things to show I'm interested. If I just want to make a move on a stranger in a bar and I'm not bothered about a relationship I'll just go right up and say "I'm shit at flirting, I'm here to come on to you, it's up to you whether you join in". Oddly, this works (well, it serves it's purpose...) but I always feel horrible after one night stands so I haven't done anything like that for a while.
 
Lucifer said:
I have a dirty sense of humor, it comes in handy when flirting.

People tend to mistake my naughtiness for actual interest.

I am what you would call a tease.

:m122:
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Haha! You're amazing. I <3 ENFPs

TheDaringHatTrick said:
Don't ask me. I don't even know when I'm flirting, but I get accused of it a lot.

But not knowing I'm doing it is a good thing, because as soon as I'm conscious of the fact that someone's flirting with me or that I'm flirting with them, I start fumbling up. Not because I think that flirting = leading someone on, I just get self-conscious because I don't know what constitutes as flirting and am unable to work out a strategy or a natural-sounding flow.
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I'm kinda the same away. I can be naturally flirtatious without realizing it, but if I try to consciously flirt I don't know what the hell I am doing. And if someone is flirting with me I get all confused too: If I like them then I am too afraid of seeming stupid because suddenly the stakes are higher, and if I don't like them then I don't want to lead them on and I don't want that kind of attention from them and I try to escape. Sometimes when trying to flirt, I try to be funny and I end up just being really corny and cheesy. lol.
Agh.

Pristinegirl said:
I take flirting as being purposefully charming ?
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I like that definition. haha.
But what about accidentally flirting?
Can one be "accidentally purposefully charming"?
Cuz, like I just said, I can't really flirt purposefully....lol.


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Crabby Lil Me said:
I like that definition. haha.
But what about accidentally flirting?
Can one be "accidentally purposefully charming"?
Cuz, like I just said, I can't really flirt purposefully....lol.


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Most definetly I think you can!! Haha well I think I do that alot myself.
I find that admiration and expressing sweetness is a kind of unconscious flirting for me xD
 
Pristinegirl said:
Most definetly I think you can!! Haha well I think I do that alot myself.
I find that admiration and expressing sweetness is a kind of unconscious flirting for me xD
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Hehehe. Well now I wanna flirt with you!
...oh no...here comes the awkwardness.....
:m092:

haha.
 
justeccentricnotinsane said:
If I just want to make a move on a stranger in a bar and I'm not bothered about a relationship I'll just go right up and say "I'm shit at flirting, I'm here to come on to you, it's up to you whether you join in". Oddly, this works
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It's not odd, you've just said the magic words to get a guy into bed.

We're simple creatures because we'd rather not overcomplicate the trivial.
 
Nope, I don't really do it much. It's always felt awkward and I usually don't see the point. I've always kind of felt like the point to most people was to test the other person out, see how much they liked you. I didn't need flirting to figure this out.

It's also an ego thing to some types of people. If you don't flirt with them, or flirt back with them, they get offended and have no interest in you whatsoever. I don't need those kinds of people around. Get to know someone by talking about meaningful things--not by making sly comments about their "assets".

With all that being said, if I get really comfortable around someone and get to know them first, I will do it. That's the point where I am not conscious of it. Then it's easier, more comfortable. I like to joke around, so it then becomes a natural extention of that.
 
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I'm not especially good at flirting or socializing. I've been told I'm charming a couple of times in my life. Every now and then I can come up with a clever turn of words for flirting, but I usually think of it after the moment passed. I always felt shy when flirted with, so wasn't a great source of responses.
 
I rarely flirt unless I'm approached first. It's not out of snobbery, but I'm typically not feeling confident enough to go strike up a convo with someone.

I kind of need someone to put forth a little energy first and then I can follow up on it.
 
gius said:
i like flirting with shy people

such cute people
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They're also easier targets... er... easier to approach. ;)
 
ilovethewind said:
How are you with flirting? It makes me feel kind of awkward. I don't know if I'm very good at it either. Any advice? :m176:
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My definition of flirting would be purposely trying let someone know that you're interested in them, and yes I do flirt (though not very often), and I'd say I'm alright at it.

Usually I'll look at them and smile, try to make them laugh, try to get to know them...I guess pretty much the same things I do with anyone I enjoy the company of. I'm sure if a girl did these things it would work as flirting.

If a girl is shy or awkward, that isn't something that would make me give up on getting to know them. Be yourself. There are plenty of guys who are brave enough to break through any awkwardness you might have.

To relax, maybe you could imagine the guy dancing like a stripper.
I hear that's pretty much a turn-off for most women...it might help you stay focused. :m2:
 
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If I feel confident (normally with shy people, or warm people) I am naturally a flirt. I have certain facial expressions I only use with people I fancy, and apparently my shyness and blushing is attractive(?!) Also, if someone is interested in me, and flirts with me, I will generally flirt back. I don't know what it is that I do tbh, but people have just said I do it.
 
I flirt too much and its been getting me into trouble lately. The problem is I don't REALIZE I'm flirting. Its just the way I communicate. When I had a fella, no one took me at all seriously, now its like... complicated. Hee.
 
TheDaringHatTrick said:
Don't ask me. I don't even know when I'm flirting, but I get accused of it a lot.

But not knowing I'm doing it is a good thing, because as soon as I'm conscious of the fact that someone's flirting with me or that I'm flirting with them, I start fumbling up. Not because I think that flirting = leading someone on, I just get self-conscious because I don't know what constitutes as flirting and am unable to work out a strategy or a natural-sounding flow.
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Same here TDHT, I never realize I'm doing it and as soon as I do I become terrible at it.
 
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