Are you ever intimidated by very attractive people? | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

Are you ever intimidated by very attractive people?

when someone is just conventionally physically attractive, i don't always notice them that much. or i notice and i'm like "ooh pretty" and then i see a butterfly and immediately forget. sometimes i've met people who want their attractiveness to be noticed and they act like by interacting with me they're giving their attractiveness to me like some kind of gift. that annoys me.

sometimes i'm attracted to someone who is conventionally attractive and then i get very very shy and become really annoyed with myself! so i just completely ignore the person and shut them out.

sometimes, if i'm truly attracted to someone deep down, i just have to go and talk to them. it doesn't matter how conventionally attractive they are or how shy i feel, i just have to walk up to them and say hello. and when i do say hello, my shyness just vanishes, and all i want is to talk and get to know them. *i wish this had happened more often...
 
invisible said:
sometimes i'm attracted to someone who is conventionally attractive and then i get very very shy and become really annoyed with myself! so i just completely ignore the person and shut them out.

sometimes, if i'm truly attracted to someone deep down, i just have to go and talk to them. it doesn't matter how conventionally attractive they are or how shy i feel, i just have to walk up to them and say hello. and when i do say hello, my shyness just vanishes, and all i want is to talk and get to know them. *i wish this had happened more often...
Click to expand...
^^^This
 
I was once in a lawsuit where one of the opposing parties was an extremely handsome man, the fact of which I didn't notice until the women lawyers on our side pointed it out. They nicknamed him "Ken" as in Barbie's boyfriend. He was so stupid it was more pathetic than funny. It's hard to imagine how, after he uttered a few syllables, anyone could be intimidated by his looks. I'm glad he was on the other side. He helped us win our case.
 
invisible said:
sometimes i'm attracted to someone who is conventionally attractive and then i get very very shy and become really annoyed with myself! so i just completely ignore the person and shut them out.

sometimes, if i'm truly attracted to someone deep down, i just have to go and talk to them. it doesn't matter how conventionally attractive they are or how shy i feel, i just have to walk up to them and say hello. and when i do say hello, my shyness just vanishes, and all i want is to talk and get to know them. *i wish this had happened more often...
Click to expand...

I agree, if you are generally attracted to someone deep down, you just have to try to go and talk with them. It's like a compulsion.
Granted, I'd generally try and talk to them anyway... but if the fella is much prettier than I am, I will feel extremely insecure. XD

When I'm insecure I tend to be MORE outgoing. I try to make the people around me laugh. Unfortunately this tends to put me firmly in the "friend zone" faster than the US can spend a dollar - which is usually where I WANT to be... except in those few instances where I really want the guy to like me. >.<
 
Lumi Spitsbergen said:
I agree, if you are generally attracted to someone deep down, you just have to try to go and talk with them. It's like a compulsion.
Click to expand...
How deep down can you get if you've never talked to them before?

And what about those people who are attractive but have one of those "easy to talk to" or "welcoming" faces? I don't think I've ever scared anyone off but I do attract people who are all ready to tell me their life story or ask me questions about the area.

I'm not sure how many people are actually intimidated by good looks, but I bet its an I thing, simply because we don't need other people to feel energized so if we don't find a situation even partly socially suitable to us, we'll rather avoid it. If a person might cause us to feel self-conscious it'll lead to feeling drained so we don't want to be there. However, an E type might find attractive people fascinating or energizing just to be around and will engage them.

Nowhere in this do I figure insecurities, because really, the response to attractiveness is so basic an instinct pretty much everyone suffers from it. I don't think I'd like to call it true insecurity, since its like a "default".
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gaze
DoveAlexa said:
How deep down can you get if you've never talked to them before?

And what about those people who are attractive but have one of those "easy to talk to" or "welcoming" faces? I don't think I've ever scared anyone off but I do attract people who are all ready to tell me their life story or ask me questions about the area.

I'm not sure how many people are actually intimidated by good looks, but I bet its an I thing, simply because we don't need other people to feel energized so if we don't find a situation even partly socially suitable to us, we'll rather avoid it. If a person might cause us to feel self-conscious it'll lead to feeling drained so we don't want to be there. However, an E type might find attractive people fascinating or energizing just to be around and will engage them.

Nowhere in this do I figure insecurities, because really, the response to attractiveness is so basic an instinct pretty much everyone suffers from it. I don't think I'd like to call it true insecurity, since its like a "default".
Click to expand...

Hahaha, you make a good point! True caring can't happen when you don't know a person, but I was talking levels of attraction.
For instance, a good looking face and body is always fairly attractive. If the guy makes a fool of himself by acting like a jerk to the people around him then the attraction dissipates. IF the guy on the other hand starts talking about italo calvino's cosmicomics to whoever (yes, I eavesdrop in crowds), and looks me in the eyes when we talk... well... within that 5-15 minutes I'll be "deeply" attracted. XD

To be honest, and this might just be an odd thing for my type or just me, but I don't belive it's fake insecurity. To me insecurity is most real (and most irritating) when it influences the actions you might otherwise take.

Now, I can't actually say I'm intimidated by that person, but then I'm rarely intimidated by anyone (with great exception to my high school chemistry teacher who literally frightened the A's out of me), but is it natural to feel a certain amount of real insecurity? yes.

As far as "welcoming faces" go, I have one of those myself. I am constantly being told by a stranger their life story, drug experience, religious experience, crazy dreams, fears, and ambitions. I love it ;)
I don't think it has as much to do with attractiveness as blandness, though (if you are an adonis/aphrodite I give you my humble apologies).
In my experience people just like faces that seem familiar or regular.
 
Last edited:
For me, not really.

As for my wife, I'm not sure. I remember when we first started dating, she would get all flustered when talking with me, and start flubbing sentences.

She's over that now.

Hmmmm...... Now I wonder if I'm not as attractive to her as I once was. :Cry:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Inquisitive
Res said:
Are you ever intimidated by very attractive people?

Yes, my name is res and i'm very intimidated by highly attractive people.


*hope i'm not the only one* :m196:
Click to expand...

I am too, I even stutter sometimes in front of them as well.

I'm more nervous though then scared, though I do feel a little bit afraid though.
 
Well, people don't get nervous around me. Maybe that's because I don't like them and they know it.
:m027:

I get nervous around some attractive people that I'm attracted to though. That's natural for most people.
 
I sometimes feel intimidated by highly attractive women, yes.

they make me feel aware of my own unatractiveness, and scared that my partner will suddenly notice that I'm unatractive and run away.
 
Nah, not at all. People are people in my opinion but if they have a holier than thou attitude I probably am more apt to rub their inferiorities in their face. Not right but I'll give them a harder time than I would someone less attractive I guess.
 
Quite a bit, yes. They make me feel inferior and thus intimidated.
 
I've met a few breathtakingly beautiful people but I wouldn't say I was intimidated.
 
Hmm.

Part of me wants to answer, "yes," and part of me wants to answer, "no".

It really depends on the person, and their personality. Some incredibly attractive people have an air about them that frightens me, others don't. But, same could be said with anyone.


So... maybe no?
 
I'm far more intimidated by highly successful people.
 
all my cognitive processes stop around cute girls
and I'm all like
:m200: :m015: :m196:

and worried she'll noticed I noticed her
then awkward and self conscious
 
  • Like
Reactions: jyrffw54
Not in the least. Then again, I'm rarely intimidated by others, unless a gun, a knife, and a monkey. Must ****** the monkeys ***** never again ***** monkeys. :m169:
 
yes attractive women intimidate me to the point where interaction seems pointless. agreed that when you do start a conversation, the nervousness or whatever usually just goes away (and maybe youre happy you reached out)
 
Yes I do, and I also feel very intimidated by very unattractive people...
 
Yup, I get a bit intimidated by really attractive people.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back