How To Improve Extroverted Sensing | Page 4 | INFJ Forum

How To Improve Extroverted Sensing

I knew you were going to crash this party, VH. :p

Thanks for the info.
 
Ria said:
I find I have become good at this in my job.

Although, I have to admit that outside of work, I feel guilty because usually I am completely disinterested in my surroundings and even when I try to take them in, I just cannot experience total gratification or admiration that I see/hear other people express...

Does anyone else here find this to be true for themselves too?
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"Hey John, you just came in from outside right?"

Me: "Yea."

"What's the weather like?"

Me: "I... have no idea!"
 
Von Hase said:
I don't mean to bust anyone's chops, but I'm seeing a lot of conjecture on how to improve Se that has nothing to do with Se.

Focusing on details on a rational level is the function of Si. Examples include picking out the details in pictures, memory games, and the like. Si is the function of taking in what you perceive. Examples of Si include sheet music, cooking from recipe, using rote strategies in games like chess, mathematical reasoning, counting, analysis of surroundings, and the like.

Se is is the function of being part of what you perceive. Examples of Se activities include, visual art, using reactive tactics in games like Go, improvised music, martial arts, free form dance, athletics, camping, outdoorsy activities, target shooting, archery, jogging, sports, juggling, acrobatics, and the like.

Se can also be very competitive, and thrives on projecting strength. All of the people I know who have firearms permits and carry them regularly have a fairly strong Se. For example, my brother in law is an ISTP who never leaves the house without his gun. His father is an ENTJ who is a career Marine drill sergeant who served in Vietnam and owns several dozen firearms, yet never carries a gun outside his house unless he goes hunting (and all of his guns are hunting or target shooting weapons, which are both very Se activities). This is a good example of difference between secondary Se and tertiary Se. Secondary Se needs to feel capable of protection at all times (for T types that is physical protection, and for F types that is emotional protection). Tertiary Se is comfortable knowing that they can protect themselves when need be. Inferior Se gives protection last priority, but does consider it - for example INTJs are prone to take enough martial arts classes to feel confident in self defense, but after that give it up. Ironically, none of these friends would ever use this projected, implied, or reserved strength to harm anyone needlessly. Se is the projection of strength for more than the application of it.

At the same time, Se is very communal and benevolent. I personally think that Se is the biggest reason for the success of dance clubs. One of my favorite examples of the manifestation of Se is watching large groups of people who love each other spontaneously dancing in unison at a party. All of a sudden when a certain song comes on, the whole dance floor pops into position and everyone starts doing the same dance, and having a blast.

Lastly, this guy is perhaps the best example of Se I've ever seen.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MeiwLLZjDo[/YOUTUBE]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MeiwLLZjDo
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HAH! I bet my boss at work is an ISTJ
 
I have a friend who has inspired me to follow my impulses more often.

We do things like yell back at cars that honk at us, walk to the park on impulse, climb trees, and dance.
Before I would be hesitant to be in the moment and just DO.

But is that enough to be considered Se? Is it something else entirely?
 
Von Hase said:
Based on your scores, I think it is likely that your self perspective is assessing your Ni and Ti higher than they are as tandem uses of Ne and Fi. If the only thing you actually use is Ne and Fi, they can merge to simulate Ni and Ti well enough for you to function. A lot of INFJs have merged their Ni and Fe to simulate Ne and Fi, even Te. This is really the failing of self assessment. People only have their own perspective to measure themselves against functions they may not use.
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Off topic I would suppose, but if self assessment can result in inflated scores (It's obvious that it can) what would be the proper way to get the 'right' results?
 
Von Hase said:
Se is is the function of being part of what you perceive. Examples of Se activities include, visual art, using reactive tactics in games like Go, improvised music, martial arts, free form dance, athletics, camping, outdoorsy activities, target shooting, archery, jogging, sports, juggling, acrobatics, and the like.
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Very interesting post, Von Hase!

I'm curious about one thing. How do you mean Se is used in Go? I thought it was mainly an NT game.

Edit:
I play Go, and also enjoy most of the Se things you mention in the post. But I never saw a connection.
 
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Hmm. So that's Se. I find I do this myself at work when I get pushed by an extreme influx of customers. All of a sudden I am doing everything with the absolute minimum number of motions. I know exactly where my employees are, my customers are, and what the next ten or so steps are. I'm twirling knives, precisely measuring with handfuls, and always making the next efficient movement.

I love it when I get that way.
 
Man that Se business is tricky. I'm glad I have my Ti to keep it in check.
If I followed all of my Se impulses, well, I probably would've committed suicide by now. I mean I quicky rationalize why not to do such a thing as soon as the thought even enters my brain, but the impulses come up.
 
Lol solar, thank you. It's not really major. It's more like ugh I'm so frustrated and I want this to end now. I think it's more of a "I'm really impatient with myself" thing. My istj mother sort of conditioned me to be that way. As Indigo says, Ni is a slow function, so it often frustrates my mom. She is in no way unkind to me, just a little bit quick-tempered sometimes. And so I somehow made myself nervous and impatient with myself, even if no one else is.
 
midnightmelody said:
Lol solar, thank you. It's not really major. It's more like ugh I'm so frustrated and I want this to end now. I think it's more of a "I'm really impatient with myself" thing. My istj mother sort of conditioned me to be that way. As Indigo says, Ni is a slow function, so it often frustrates my mom. She is in no way unkind to me, just a little bit quick-tempered sometimes. And so I somehow made myself nervous and impatient with myself, even if no one else is.
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lol my mom also is frustrated by my Ni..She gets mad at me and impatient with me for things I really don't find any reasons to get mad about.
 
midnightmelody said:
Lol solar, thank you. It's not really major. It's more like ugh I'm so frustrated and I want this to end now. I think it's more of a "I'm really impatient with myself" thing. My istj mother sort of conditioned me to be that way. As Indigo says, Ni is a slow function, so it often frustrates my mom. She is in no way unkind to me, just a little bit quick-tempered sometimes. And so I somehow made myself nervous and impatient with myself, even if no one else is.
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Yeah, good Ni rests on experience, so it's a pita at times. :)

I've been there with suicidal tendencies a ton of times. No one ever knew it either, because I can stonewall with the best of them. I hope you find your magic key soon, because you deserve to! :hug:
 
Solar Empath said:
Yeah, good Ni rests on experience, so it's a pita at times. :)

I've been there with suicidal tendencies a ton of times. No one ever knew it either, because I can stonewall with the best of them. I hope you find your magic key soon, because you deserve to! :hug:
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Glad to know I'm not just a crazy.

It's easy to snap out of it but sometimes I wish I weren't so dramatic. Yeah, I'm pretty sure nobody knows other than those I just told on this forum, haha. In fact, I've never really opened up about anything that dark. It's kind of odd and maybe I shouldn't have done so.
But I appreciate that you listened.
 
midnightmelody said:
Glad to know I'm not just a crazy.

It's easy to snap out of it but sometimes I wish I weren't so dramatic. Yeah, I'm pretty sure nobody knows other than those I just told on this forum, haha. In fact, I've never really opened up about anything that dark. It's kind of odd and maybe I shouldn't have done so.
But I appreciate that you listened.
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Meh, sometimes it's good to let it out, even if it's only in text on a forum.

Better than thinking you are irretrievably broken IMO.

As for the mood shifts, yeah I get those too. Sometimes Empathy and Intuition is a hard burden. The worst thing though is when you start getting upset about being upset... I have to remind myself often that it is okay to feel bad, it doesn't make me broken. And while I may not think like the average ST, I think the NF viewpoint is important to making society a worthwhile place to exist. It's just hard when the weight of whatever you are carrying seems too much to bear.
 
Solar Empath said:
Meh, sometimes it's good to let it out, even if it's only in text on a forum.

Better than thinking you are irretrievably broken IMO.

As for the mood shifts, yeah I get those too. Sometimes Empathy and Intuition is a hard burden. The worst thing though is when you start getting upset about being upset... I have to remind myself often that it is okay to feel bad, it doesn't make me broken. And while I may not think like the average ST, I think the NF viewpoint is important to making society a worthwhile place to exist. It's just hard when the weight of whatever you are carrying seems too much to bear.
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You broke into my mind! Ah!

Lately I have just been so annoyed by my emotions. I wish they would just settle down. But then I remind myself that they are only natural and that I can find ways to handle them.
 
midnightmelody said:
You broke into my mind! Ah!

Lately I have just been so annoyed by my emotions. I wish they would just settle down. But then I remind myself that they are only natural and that I can find ways to handle them.
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I didn't break in. That's a very normal response in an emotional person (which isn't the same thing as a moody person: you can be both, neither or either). BUT in a world that denies the value of emotion, you never get to hear it.

I try to remind myself that feeling is okay. Also, I try to avoid personal feedback: I think of something, it upsets me. Then since I am upset I start to dredge up every single thing that makes me feel that way, reinforcing the upset feeling. An hour later I realize I am upset about something completely irrelevant! Sucks. I try to nip that in the bud any more. Doesn't always work, but it does help some for me.
 
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