Happiness

aerosol

aerosol

American trash
MBTI
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
I think I expect too much out of life. I've been thinking lately that maybe we are not supposed to stay happy for very long periods of time. There must have been somebody (or some force) who created this existence and I'm just pondering what they had in mind for us. I try to look at clues as to how this world was formed and what it is made up of. Summer could symbolize the height of happiness, but that's only about one fourth of the year or so. 24 hrs in a day is 12 hrs light and 12 hrs dark. An orgasm is extremely short. The taste of food only lasts for a moment.

Maybe there are no clues. Maybe the clue is to make the best out of life and just see how that makes you feel. Still... I wonder if we as people are supposed to be generally happy or generally unhappy? Life and the way humans think are kind of laid out to make us unhappy, seems like. Always striving for something better, never content...
I've been unhappy/normal like 80% of my life, and the rest either content/flippin' superhappy. Seems unfair, or maybe this is how it breaks down for others, too?
 
Doesn't that kind of reasoning imply there's some kind of system that regulates how much happiness one individual "gets?"

But~ I never thought that dopamine regulation had any connections to higher powers.

LoL

But, No~ but uuh~ Happiness.... well, you control a lot of how you feel... Wasn't that Taoist? You can't control how things spell out, but you can always control how you will react upon it. Yea, I guess some people are better at this than others.... but that shouldn't be a reason to discourage anyone!

Regardless... We should cherish the darker times of our lives.... for the more despair you have experienced the greater you will experience happiness. Because obviously.... if you're always happy.... then it's not really special at all is it? If happiness was something easily attained, who would care~?!~

BUT.... Let's see advice... I really don't like giving advice... it's scary... but let's try it just once then... just today.... I don't think you should think it's unfair how you're feeling right now.... you shouldn't blame anything. I mean... that's a really depressing thought... thinking that the world is unfair, well maybe it is, but thinking about it isn't going to do anything positive right :D?

"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"
So what Shakespeare is trying to tell us is to..... simply not think!

:m139:
 
I don't mean regulation as such. I'm more so on the philosophical side when it comes to this. What was/is the "plan" for people? To aimlessly roam around in life, looking for a purpose? When they were created/came about, was the idea that they will be a happy bunch or just a sad bunch?

I guess you need to believe that the universe was created by someone or something in order to discuss this. I see so much clever logic in the world and everything is related and it's just beautiful. That makes me think the existence of universe can't have been random. And if someone/something is behind this, they must have had some idea of what they'd like people to do and feel here.
 
aerosol said:
I think I expect too much out of life. I've been thinking lately that maybe we are not supposed to stay happy for very long periods of time. There must have been somebody (or some force) who created this existence and I'm just pondering what they had in mind for us. I try to look at clues as to how this world was formed and what it is made up of. Summer could symbolize the height of happiness, but that's only about one fourth of the year or so. 24 hrs in a day is 12 hrs light and 12 hrs dark. An orgasm is extremely short. The taste of food only lasts for a moment.

Maybe there are no clues. Maybe the clue is to make the best out of life and just see how that makes you feel. Still... I wonder if we as people are supposed to be generally happy or generally unhappy? Life and the way humans think are kind of laid out to make us unhappy, seems like. Always striving for something better, never content...
I've been unhappy/normal like 80% of my life, and the rest either content/flippin' superhappy. Seems unfair, or maybe this is how it breaks down for others, too?
Click to expand...

I don't think there is a set rules for life. I think the meaning is all up to our own interpretation and the journey that gets us there. By journey, I mean tearing down everything we ever believed, examining it, and putting it back together again to draw our own conclusions. I think love plays a big, if not the sole part of our happiness. And I think happiness is misunderstood, it means, appreciating the good when its here and accepting the bad with a resolve that it is necessary to make us stronger/better and more able to love. I don't know but I suspect during those really good moments of happiness is when we are suppose to take a giant leap of faith that will sustain through tougher times.
 
Strive for mostly contentment punctuated by an occasional moment of bliss. Any better than that and you're very lucky.
 
Norton said:
Strive for mostly contentment punctuated by an occasional moment of bliss. Any better than that and you're very lucky.
Click to expand...

Yeah, that makes sense.
 
aerosol said:
I've been thinking lately that maybe we are not supposed to stay happy for very long periods of time.
Click to expand...

I agree with this. I can say from personal experience that in the time periods where I am truly happy, not much "progress" gets made. I need hardships, and challenges to have to work through in order to become a better human and a better person. Without the unhappiness to go with it, there is little to gather to understand. Of course, you need the periods of happiness to reflect, accept your "rewards" and just in general take a break.

Really, this is just about the whole yin/yang concept. Some people need more yin, some people need more yang. In the end though, you need a little of both. For me, I know I need much more yin then yang. However I strive for as much yang as I can (I am an idealist by nature afterall). Further, the idea that I accept and understand that I need more yin in my life actually creates more yang, knowing what I must do, and knowing that it won't last for ever.
 
Then a woman said, "Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow."

And he answered:

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that hold your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."

But I say unto you, they are inseparable.

Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.

Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.

When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

-Kahlil Gibran!
 
IndigoSensor said:
Further, the idea that I accept and understand that I need more yin in my life actually creates more yang, knowing what I must do, and knowing that it won't last for ever.
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But I hate the idea of that. I can't be happy forever? I want to believe I can. Happiness is a really fickle thing. Then, some can create their own happiness based on how they think. I did that when I was a little younger. I just had a positive outlook on things and I felt happy and content eventhough my life was going NOWHERE. Kind of like the book "The Secret", but less stupid.
 
Oranguh said:
Then a woman said, "Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow."

And he answered:

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that hold your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."

But I say unto you, they are inseparable.

Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.

Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.

When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

-Kahlil Gibran!
Click to expand...

I like this. I understand there has to be a bit of both.
I tried to write a more extensive reply but I erased it and realized I don't really know what I'm trying to get at in this thread. Haha. I guess the idea of life and the definition of happiness are too broad to make for easy, clear conversation.
 
Oranguh said:
Then a woman said, "Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow."

And he answered:

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that hold your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."

But I say unto you, they are inseparable.

Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.

Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.

When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

-Kahlil Gibran!
Click to expand...
This is far more beautiful than words could ever describe. Perfect in every way.
 
aerosol said:
Summer could symbolize the height of happiness, but that's only about one fourth of the year or so. 24 hrs in a day is 12 hrs light and 12 hrs dark. An orgasm is extremely short. The taste of food only lasts for a moment.
Click to expand...


these things are all physical things. the parts in life that will truely make you happy aren't physical. some of the richest, 'happiest' people in the world normaly are not happy. i think we need abstract things like love, friendship, and faith to be happy.
 
Canis lupus said:
these things are all physical things. the parts in life that will truely make you happy aren't physical. some of the richest, 'happiest' people in the world normaly are not happy. i think we need abstract things like love, friendship, and faith to be happy.
Click to expand...
I think they are more meant to be metaphors.
 
nil said:
I think they are more meant to be metaphors.
Click to expand...

Yeah. They also seem like clues to me. The cycle of the seasons... Spring is birth, Summer is prime of life, young adulthood I guess? Fall is decline and old age, detoriation... Winter is death. If you look for clues here and in other aspects of the world, it appears as though we are all "supposed" to expect to live pretty dull lives with only very minor instances of happiness. That's just my take, though.
 
If you were happy all the time, it wouldn't be "happy", it would be "normal".
 
aerosol said:
I think I expect too much out of life. I've been thinking lately that maybe we are not supposed to stay happy for very long periods of time. There must have been somebody (or some force) who created this existence and I'm just pondering what they had in mind for us. I try to look at clues as to how this world was formed and what it is made up of. Summer could symbolize the height of happiness, but that's only about one fourth of the year or so. 24 hrs in a day is 12 hrs light and 12 hrs dark. An orgasm is extremely short. The taste of food only lasts for a moment.

Maybe there are no clues. Maybe the clue is to make the best out of life and just see how that makes you feel. Still... I wonder if we as people are supposed to be generally happy or generally unhappy? Life and the way humans think are kind of laid out to make us unhappy, seems like. Always striving for something better, never content...
I've been unhappy/normal like 80% of my life, and the rest either content/flippin' superhappy. Seems unfair, or maybe this is how it breaks down for others, too?
Click to expand...
We are whatever we are, I suppose. Some have a natural predisposition to be happy, some unhappy. I was blessed (or cursed) enough to be the latter.

I think Norton got it right. Strive for contentment. Really, just try to get through. There is far too much to try to succeed perfectly, merely try to succeed... depression shall come as it comes, and euphoria shall come as it comes. That is the best I can make at this, but I am terrible at cultivating moods in myself and others, I just take it as it comes, so you might should talk to someone who is skilled at this.
 
Well, I think that introverts in general are a little less happy than extroverts because we concentrate on issues that are depressing more than extroverts. My regular mood is pretty much just content most of the time but i get into my brooding mood quite a bit too. I think that being content more than happy makes the happy moments in life more genuine and beautiful.
 
Potentially relevant to your question:

[ame="http://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Trap-Struggling-Start-Living/dp/1590305841"]The Happiness Trap[/ame]


The author's position as described in the summary:

"...happiness is not a normal state of being; pain is inevitable and what matters is how it is dealt with."
 
Hmm. Pertaining to the introverts and extroverts, I think introverts have longer periods of happiness and sadness. While extroverts go back and forth much more quickly. And you guys have came to an agreeable conclusion though: there is no up without down, no dark without light, and no happy without sad.

It's hard to draw a line in this case, but if you're looking for my opinion here it is: When you find a legit cause to fight, love, cry, and live for, thats where your contentment will be. Please note: boyfriends or girlfriends are not a legit cause. If all of your energy focuses on that sort of relationship, well, I think you know what I'm getting at.
 
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