My butterfly story, well… it begins with a dream—a dream more alive than I am now, the kind of dream you wake from and weep over when you realize it wasn’t reality.
I had been going through a lot in my life, trying to find who I am at my core beyond all the pain of the past, the guilt, and the regret that were a heavy weight. I cried many times a day to God, asking for help, for guidance toward my purpose, and for some rest in the search.
So I went to sleep that night like any other night, but I suddenly found myself in the air with a presence behind me that felt as if I was being supported and carried by it. I was high above the ground, and I could see water below me, then an armada of ships sailing in the open ocean. Then a voice said, “These are yours.”
I said nothing in response. I didn’t know what to say. We drifted through the air toward the ships, descending as we went. Once I was above them, I could see that the people on the ships did not look like normal people.
I was then set down on the deck of the last position on the very last boat. Everyone was standing, facing forward. I can best describe them as resembling the card people in Alice in Wonderland, in shape and size, with one exception: their color was a vibrant blue—unlike anything I have ever seen before.
The other strange thing was that these “people” had no heads as we understand them. Instead, there was a kind of viewing window in the center of their chest that looked like glitter in water—blue, of course. But as I looked at the person beside me, I saw them turn, and a face appeared out of the swirling, glitter-like substance. It was a face I have since come to recognize: Paramahansa Yogananda.
As I stood on the deck in awe of how alive everything was, it is something I don’t have the capacity to fully put into words. I looked to the side and saw, of all people, Benjamin Franklin and Isaac Newton. They were standing by the rail. Franklin was holding what looked like a straw, when Newton took a drop of water and placed it into one end of the straw. At once, it began to rain from the other end.
The next thing I noticed was that I had limitless senses and the ability to be wherever I thought instantly. One of the stranger things I marveled at was that there were no stars or sun or anything to give off light, yet everything was bright. I looked closer and could see down to the smallest levels, and I saw that darkness itself was giving off light.
I was then alone with myself again, and I noticed two large mountains jutting out of the sea, with trees and houses dotted across them. There was a bridge connecting the two mountains. At once, I was on the bridge, and I met an old man who looked ancient, robed entirely in white except for a gray sash he wore. He never spoke to me, only handed me a white five-petaled flower.
Then I was back in my bed, very confused.
This is what began to change me, and the information I have been able to extract from that dream has changed me. At first, I wasn’t sure what was meant when I was told, “These are yours.” Perhaps I was meant to lead them—that was my initial egoic thought—but I have come to consider that these may be past lives.
That is the short version of it.
I have not read any C.S. lewis, but I will I love to read.
I hope that you and your family have a blessed Shabbat!
