[PUG] Self-Segregation and Bigotry

[NeverAmI]

I understand that Shai Gar is the site owner. If this is correct, Then his 1st 2 posts to me both included the word TROLL in them.
When the paranoia starts at the top, it is going to have a trickle down effect.
I then chose to explain to him that between those 2 posts that he made to me, other people had moved on and began to see me for me, and not the CROW!!! I explained by telling him about my friend list and REP hits.
This has been called cock waving and now no one has rep power lsited in their inventory.
Not only that. All the "red names" have paid a visit to my profile today.
So yeah stuff goes on behind the scenes.
This is a safe place ??
I don't feel safe, not when the site admin has been convimced I have some sort of agenda since day one.

No wonder people are obessed with trolls, Its starts from the top and trickles down through the ranks and grows like a cancer.

I was wrong to call you out on it. I didn't have any clear evidence, it was just a hunch. I apologize.

You have certainly contributed to this forum and I have no intention of seeing you go away.

 

[INFJesus]

To be honest, no, your initial introduction to the forums was not fair. A number of people mentioned why this might have been the case and I would like to think we have put the past behind us. You have already established yourself as a legitimate member of the forums to a number of people and I would think that we had let things be. Except you keep bringing this point up on an almost daily basis and I think its difficult for some people not to make parallels with another poster that had a similar time accepting an apology from a fellow member.

That being said, any time someone hits a report button, the admins and mods are required to investigate. It's not always legitimate nor does not automatically mean that you are being implicated for something, but we have to check each report.

This is exactly what I was trying to address in my post above. We've all made mistakes of accusing the wrong people and we're all walking on egg shells here. It would be extremely nice if we could find some way to move past this sludge-slinging.

I bring it up frequently because, I start to feel OK about being here, and someone brings it up again. and then I feel like I have to start all over.

I am sensitive myself, and It just starts to wear me down. I am also not a push over and will defend myself, PLUS if I see others reciving the same treatment, well if I am truly an INFP, then of course I am going to defend them as well.

I would love to move past things, and I thought I had.

 

[INFJesus]

I was wrong to call you out on it. I didn't have any clear evidence, it was just a hunch. I apologize.

You have certainly contributed to this forum and I have no intention of seeing you go away.

Thank you..
I myself, find you one of the most reasonable, well spoken and brightest posters here.

 

[NeverAmI]

Thank you..
I myself, find you one of the most reasonable, well spoken and brightest posters here.

Thanks, I have certainly benefited from your posts as well.

 

[bamf]

thus my answer...lol I like to think Jesus was a rebel. But I will save that for another time...

Jesus Was A Communist

(sorry...had to do it!)

 

[sassafras]

I bring it up frequently because, I start to feel OK about being here, and someone brings it up again. and then I feel like I have to start all over.

I am sensitive myself, and It just starts to wear me down. I am also not a push over and will defend myself, PLUS if I see others reciving the same treatment, well if I am truly an INFP, then of course I am going to defend them as well.

I would love to move past things, and I thought I had.

I think we can move past this. In all honesty, from what I've seen, a number of members respect and enjoy reading your posts. I think the only thing that people have going on you at the moment is the fact that you bring up the same point over and over. I know you mean well, but it seems like you're still very much upset about how you were welcomed and it is easy to misinterpret that upset when everyone is on "crow alert" and pointing fingers.

I, for one, would like to see you comfortably settled in without being vigilant all the time. It's not pleasant and it's unfortunate that your first taste of this community is having to walk into this ballistic ball of chaos. If I personally have somehow made you uncomfortable, I do apologize. I've read a number of your posts and to say the least, I think you make a nice contribution to the forum.

I don't know if this will solve the problem, but maybe people should refrain from making "troll" accusations on the physical forum and instead pm a mod or an admin if they are concerned. I can't imagine how upsetting it is to be a legitimate member and being publicly accused of sowing chaos because someone had misinterpreted something you had said. Limiting the amount of "you're acting like a troll" conversations on the forums might remove the instances of people tailgating on those accusations and breeding further unrest.

What are your thoughts, folks?

 

[BenW]

...[Jesus] did show tendencies of an INFJ...

That's true.
He did have a blog, of sorts.

 

[WellNoWonder]

It is a manner of etiquette, I would think. It doesn't matter what you say, it is how you say it.

I have been thinking about this.

I have taken myself out of INFJ'ness (if I am one to begin with) to look at this.

What if the manner of etiquette here is seen as way to push "lies of omission" by whose who participate here who are not INFJ? It can be viewed that way. Because INFJs are good at hiding things, and I know I am for certain. Our way of relaying information in a rainbow of skittles fashion can put people off, because people can get sense/feel that we are lying, and some people can react to that in a not-so-nice way. No matter if we think we are being nice about the shit.

"Why is the person behaving nicely yet lying to me at the same time?"

 

[IndigoSensor]

I have been thinking about this.

I have taken myself out of INFJ'ness (if I am one to begin with) to look at this.

What if the manner of etiquette here is seen as way to push "lies of omission" by whose who participate here who are not INFJ? It can be viewed that way. Because INFJs are good at hiding things, and I know I am for certain. Our way of relaying information in a rainbow of skittles fashion can put people off, because people can get sense/feel that we are lying, and some people can react to that in a not-so-nice way. No matter if we think we are being nice about the shit.

"Why is the person behaving nicely yet lying to me at the same time?"

There is a fine line between being nice as to keep the peace, and being passive aggressive. It isn't hard for others to see either. Almost everyone here that tries to keep the peace, does so in a manner that does not foster arguments or escalations.

 

[Morgain]

I don't know if this will solve the problem, but maybe people should refrain from making "troll" accusations on the physical forum and instead pm a mod or an admin if they are concerned. I can't imagine how upsetting it is to be a legitimate member and being publicly accused of sowing chaos because someone had misinterpreted something you had said. Limiting the amount of "you're acting like a troll" conversations on the forums might remove the instances of people tailgating on those accusations and breeding further unrest.

What are your thoughts, folks?

I think this would help with keeping the peace yes! :becky:

 

[NeverAmI]

I have been thinking about this.

I have taken myself out of INFJ'ness (if I am one to begin with) to look at this.

What if the manner of etiquette here is seen as way to push "lies of omission" by whose who participate here who are not INFJ? It can be viewed that way. Because INFJs are good at hiding things, and I know I am for certain. Our way of relaying information in a rainbow of skittles fashion can put people off, because people can get sense/feel that we are lying, and some people can react to that in a not-so-nice way. No matter if we think we are being nice about the shit.

"Why is the person behaving nicely yet lying to me at the same time?"

I wouldn't like someone to hide their intent, for sure. I tend to think of the scope of intent as transcending general manners. However, you are right, communication definitely deserves work on both sides of the fence. Understanding is indeed a virtuous goal.