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ENFJs

All the sites I've seen him typed list him as INFP.

And I am still not convinced he is an extrovert. I mean watching him in interviews he seems rather reserved and he speaks very deliberately all would be hallmarks of him being introverted. Now even when he seems more comfortable like on a one on one situation his style of speech is still very low key. An extrovert would put more of themselves out there in the majority of situations. Even if there goal was to be private there energy would be more open.

I can certainly see what you mean. I'm willing to consider the possibility that he's an INFP, especially since INFP is the shadow function of ENFJ. It's highly possible he's being mistyped as an ENFJ.

Here's a few of the websites I was basing this on...

http://typelogic.com/enfj.html
http://www.mypersonality.info/personality-types/enfj/
http://www.purchase.com/blog/psychology/enfj
 
As an ENFJ I would say you are right (at least in my case). I do know of a lot of people on campus and almost always recognize a face I have talked to and can talk to if I end up having to eat dinner with out my core 5 friends. Though I really I prefer my core group of 5 people that I always hangout with and do things with because I like building deep relationships with people. As for the recharging time, sometimes I do like it, though it isn't as necessary as it is for my Introverted friends.
 
As an ENFJ I would say you are right (at least in my case). I do know of a lot of people on campus and almost always recognize a face I have talked to and can talk to if I end up having to eat dinner with out my core 5 friends. Though I really I prefer my core group of 5 people that I always hangout with and do things with because I like building deep relationships with people. As for the recharging time, sometimes I do like it, though it isn't as necessary as it is for my Introverted friends.

This really sounds like me.

I don't like to be completely alone very often, but I do like to withdraw down to one or two people that I am close with when I need to recharge, which is often. These have to be people that I can harmonize with because being completely alone isn't quite the same as having shared harmony - and I recharge with harmony. I can only stand so much chaos and confusion, and then I have to get away from it and recharge with harmony.

A classic example. If I am at a party, I get overwhelmed in proportion to how many people are there, how many of them I don't know, and how much noise and confusion is going on. Once I've reached my limit, I have to go find somewhere quiet to be 'alone', but I prefer to find somewhere with one or two people that I can harmonize with. To me, that counts as 'alone', because I'm alone with them.
 
what are your thoughts on a friendship relationship between an INFJ male and an ENFJ female? how do those tend to turn out?
or should I say:
INFJ + ENFJ (E very high) = ?
 
On the subject of the ENFJ / INFP connection, brought up with Johnny Depp... as well as the difference between our idealized self image and our real selves...

There is a quiz that attempts to measure one's ideal self and real self. We have a thread devoted to it here.

I've taken this quiz several times, and almost always come up with scores very similar to the following...

Results From 2 Years Ago

attachment.php


Last Year's Results

ideal you |||||| real you ||||||

Introversion
||||||||||36%
|||||||||||||50%
Extroversion
||||||||||||||||66%
||||||||||||||53%
Intuitive
||||||||||||||||||73%
|||||||||||||||||| 73%
Sensing
||||||||||||||||63%
||||||||||||||60%
Feeling
||||||||||||||||70%
|||||||||||||||| 70%
Thinking
||||||||||||||56%
||||||||||||||56%
Judging
|||||||||||||||||| 76%
|||||||||||||| 60%
Perceiving
||||||||||||43%
||||||||||||50%

ideal type - ENFJ, real type
 
what are your thoughts on a friendship relationship between an INFJ male and an ENFJ female? how do those tend to turn out?
or should I say:
INFJ + ENFJ (E very high) = ?

I would assume this would be a golden relationship. As friends, you guys could have a lot of harmony. Just watch out for moments where your Fe disagrees on how things should be, and be willing to accept each others' feelings as valid. 'Agree to disagree'.

As lovers, I'd consider this ideal, but unfortunately the very E ENFJ female might walk all over the meek INFJ who would probably let her. The ENFJ would have to be more mature to appreciate what the INFJ has to offer as real strength and stability. Otherwise, she will probably see the INFJ male as 'not strong enough' to be a mate.
 
I would assume this would be a golden relationship. As friends, you guys could have a lot of harmony. Just watch out for moments where your Fe disagrees on how things should be, and be willing to accept each others' feelings as valid. 'Agree to disagree'.

As lovers, I'd consider this ideal, but unfortunately the very E ENFJ female might walk all over the meek INFJ who would probably let her. The ENFJ would have to be more mature to appreciate what the INFJ has to offer as real strength and stability. Otherwise, she will probably see the INFJ male as 'not strong enough' to be a mate.

That makes a lot of sense.
 
I am just about ready to give up on trying to type you, and just auto respond and say "you are currently in 'I think I am xNFJ mode', and have been for x amount of time, so you will just change to the other in x amount of time" :D
 
I would assume this would be a golden relationship. As friends, you guys could have a lot of harmony. Just watch out for moments where your Fe disagrees on how things should be, and be willing to accept each others' feelings as valid. 'Agree to disagree'.

As lovers, I'd consider this ideal, but unfortunately the very E ENFJ female might walk all over the meek INFJ who would probably let her. The ENFJ would have to be more mature to appreciate what the INFJ has to offer as real strength and stability. Otherwise, she will probably see the INFJ male as 'not strong enough' to be a mate.
my circle of core friends here is 3INFJ's (myself included) 2ENFJ's 1ISTJ (we don't understand this either) and 1ENTP. The INFJ/ENFJ friendship is WONDERFUL.
 
This really sounds like me.

A classic example. If I am at a party, I get overwhelmed in proportion to how many people are there, how many of them I don't know, and how much noise and confusion is going on. Once I've reached my limit, I have to go find somewhere quiet to be 'alone', but I prefer to find somewhere with one or two people that I can harmonize with. To me, that counts as 'alone', because I'm alone with them.

I actually agree with you very much on this. At parties I host I have no more than 8-10 people because more would be out of hand (and I dont have a close enough relationship with more than that many people that I would invite to a party anyway) but at other parties when I go I may mingle very little, but I typical stay close to people I know really well, but furthermore I don't go to parties anyway because 1) I can't tolerate that many people (mainly because too many are drunk and its obnoxious) 2) I hate drinking around large groups of people because I feel like I can't relax for fear of doing something stupid or not being able to respond if something bad happens.

So it would seem (at least in my case) I'm a very I ENFJ, or one who just doesn't like crowds
 
you're just atypical sparkz. accept it.
 
[quote=N
 
I am just about ready to give up on trying to type you, and just auto respond and say "you are currently in 'I think I am xNFJ mode', and have been for x amount of time, so you will just change to the other in x amount of time" :D

directed to whom? Von i assume?
 
I have question. I know three enfjs. They all react same in our friendships. First, share similar toughts and sense of humor and interest. They are very intelligent and nice pieple. But, if I don't see any of them for some times, I am the one that has make phone call or text message. Almost always. What I want to say? Isi it just case with my enfjs or enfjs have tendency to "forget" friends if they are not at their sight. For me, I don't change friendships easily. If I gave someone my trust, I need them in my life. Because, I chose every single friend of mine. But, enfjs in my case have habbit to forget to contact. Isi it me or:)? I was wandering that for some time...
 
About my question.
Isn't it more logical that enfjs would have to be one that want to stay in contact. Because their Fe is first function, for me it is second. I am courious because I have different levels of friendship with my three enfjs, but they all react at almost identical way.
 
One of the best anecdotes I ever read in a description of ENFJs comments on the ENFJ...

TRADEMARK: "The first shall be last"

This refers to the open-door policy of ENFJs. One ENFJ colleague always welcomes me into his office regardless of his own circumstances. If another person comes to the door, he allows them to interrupt our conversation with their need. While discussing that need, the phone rings and he stops to answer it. Others drop in with a 'quick question.' I finally get up, go to my office and use the call waiting feature on the telephone. When he hangs up, I have his undivided attention!


This is actually how DOMINANT Fe behaves. It is so concerned with people that it assumes everyone else is too and understands that the newest person is the most important. Fe is always willing to get out of the way to let someone else ahead of them, and dominant Fe users assume everyone feels this way.


That sounds exactly like me, actually. Hm.
 
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That sounds exactly like me, actually. Hm.

Yeah, it's exactly me too.

None of the INFJs I know suffer from this issue to the degree that I, or my other ENFJ friends do.

What I've come to assume is that ENFJs seem a lot like INFJs when they engage in introverted activities, or are forced to lean on their introverted functions, especially Ti. ENFJs have to really press into their introversion to use Ti. This means that those of us who are on forums like this, talking about theory and the inner workings of the mind, are likely to score as INFJs because we have solid Ni and Ti functions and being in this mode tips the scales when we self inventory.

Yeah hun, I think me and you are ENFJs.

We're too bad ass not to be (aka tertiary Se).
 
Agree with the above. The avatars say it all. :) Now please don't kick my ass.