Would you be attracted to yourself?
- Thread starter Satya
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Satisfaction is not the same as attraction. You can be satisfied with people you aren't attracted to and attracted to people who do not meet your standards or needs.
Excellent posts up until now by the way. I've loved reading all these replies.
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The one thing that I wouldn't like in bizarro-me is that I'm not much of an intellectual and I am not very knowledgable about many things. (I'm good at coming off as such, though haha!) I'm pretty scatter-brained. So I wouldn't really respect a mate who wasn't very very intelligent and mentally organized. All my information is kinda jarbled.
I would be attracted to my responsible nature and perseverence. I think I'd be really attracted to the deep emotional nature tempered with reason, emotional stability. Or the "hard on the outside, softie on the inside" nature.
I would be attracted to my responsible nature and perseverence. I think I'd be really attracted to the deep emotional nature tempered with reason, emotional stability. Or the "hard on the outside, softie on the inside" nature.
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I'm still thinking about whether or not I would be attracted to myself.
But on first thought, when I first tread the thread, I said: "No. Absolutely not".
And I don't think I would be attracted to someone who lacked confidence and didn't like themselves.
Or even if I liked them and felt attracted on some level, I don't know whether I would pursue the attraction/relationship because it's important to me to be with someone who has achieved a certain level of self-development and growth. It all depends on the degree, of course. But sometimes if someone doesn't love themselves or even like themselves, then perhaps they're not truly in a place to be part of the kind of relationship I envision. Then again, that kind of relationship love is what brings some people to develop love for themselves. Maybe I idealize a bit too much :noidea:.
A big part of being able to love someone is being able to love yourself and appreciate the love they shower you with, out of appreciation rather than need. :love:
I know that's different from attraction though, I diverged..
But on first thought, when I first tread the thread, I said: "No. Absolutely not".
And I don't think I would be attracted to someone who lacked confidence and didn't like themselves.
Or even if I liked them and felt attracted on some level, I don't know whether I would pursue the attraction/relationship because it's important to me to be with someone who has achieved a certain level of self-development and growth. It all depends on the degree, of course. But sometimes if someone doesn't love themselves or even like themselves, then perhaps they're not truly in a place to be part of the kind of relationship I envision. Then again, that kind of relationship love is what brings some people to develop love for themselves. Maybe I idealize a bit too much :noidea:.
A big part of being able to love someone is being able to love yourself and appreciate the love they shower you with, out of appreciation rather than need. :love:
I know that's different from attraction though, I diverged..
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::shrug:: I think you come off as intelligent and interesting. I say this as a a raging intellect snob. My boyfriend has an IQ of 185 and when I found out, I proposed to him on sight. I know its silly to care so much about stuff like that, but I do. You're probably just not giving yourself enough credit.
Merrytrees, I agree with J.N., you do seem intelligent.
JustNickey, I don't think it's silly
It's obviously important to you and something you care about. I am curious, what makes it so important?It represents the soul (I think in anyone) and the inner femine of the male in Jungian psychology. In order to not too much derail this topic and to give the Anima topic some wings of it's own, I'll make a new topic about it. I have some questions on that myself.
I was about to post then realised you said everything I was about to say, but more coherently and without droning melodrama. :blah:Everything, except that I would like to be friends with my counterpart. I would like to provide the support and encouragement that I/they cannot muster up on my/their own to initiate and maintain growth.
I would be pretty attracted to myself, well perhaps not until one of us sparked an interesting topic of discussion. A combination between being logical and being able to bring out positive feeling? Hell yeah! I don't know about the boring part exactly. I tend to be pretty boring when inside of my shell but I doubt that would be a problem when i'm comfortable with the individual in question. We'd probably be good for each others self esteem, and be able to contribute different viewpoints to a given discussion.
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Merrytrees, I agree with J.N., you do seem intelligent.
JustNickey, I don't think it's silly
I think its just that I spent so much time pretending to be dumb so boys wouldn't be intimidated by me. I think I 'acted' myself stupid, actually. When I find a guy I can be myself around, or better yet, can teach me a few things, I'm over the moon. Plus I like to banter a lot and it takes a bit of cleverness for that. My boyfriend has to remind me life is not a Joss Whedon script with everyone speaking in puns and quips. And I just want smart kids...
LOLx2.
A) yeah. I dumbed down a LOT in my youth/teen/young adult years. I got very tired of watching them edge away toward the nearest EXIT when I spoke.
B) I love the "Life as a Joss Whedon script" vignette. I'm a big fan. I was once told my life was a David Lynch film. Wanna trade?
Yeah, but every so often (read 1/1,000,000,000,000; but much more likely in this forum) one edges closer. I always did have a thing for the smart women, otherwise conversations get dull...fast.
Mentally - i probably would be attracted to myself, after all, we'd be of similar intelligence.
Emotionally - maybe. i don't really want to go that deep here, plus it'll take more time than I have.
Physically - probably. I'd definitely be into a girl who trains as much BJJ as I do. Assuming grappling does the same things for her as it does for me, just balanced out with more estrogen, she'd be probably physically attractive (I think). Crooked fingers are hot...
Other - musical skills are a plus. but I hope the female version of me sings better...
I think we'd be friends at least.
If I were a woman and I met me, that's completely different, because I'm not a woman and am not sure exactly what they want...But I don't think i'd be immediately repulsed by me.
No. Too much alike= friends only. It will be very odd and extremely boring to be attracted to someone that's exactly like myself. There may be some common interests but there has to be differences... Otherwise, it will be perversely narcissistic.
I'm one of those people who have a reeeaally hard time noticing any good qualities about myself, so I dunno, probably not.
Sad, isn't it? >>
Sad, isn't it? >>
Tsk. Tsk. It looks like at least one person didn't read the original post all the way through.
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Satya, thanks for pointing that out. I re-read the initial post.
If we are talking about physical attributes, I like myself the way I am. If I were a guy, I probably would find me (girl) interesting. But then, for me attraction is more to do with how the person is, not how the person looks like. Ok, may be that's more about relationship, still not really answering the question....
I like my hair color. But it will change as a person ages, umm, usually. When that happens, I may have a new definition of what is attractive.
I am not tall but I like the way I am. Because it doesn't look proportional if I get too tall.
I like my strengths- my logic, my thought process, my work ethic, my empathy/sensitivity.
I do not like my weaknesses- not outspoken enough, not good with languages, too judgemental sometimes.
I like what I like- certain scents, clean bathrooms, mango ice-cream, people with good hygiene.
Ok I don't always have good hygiene myself, especially when I am stressed out, tired, etc. But I always excuse myself by cleaning up the next day or when I feel less tired.
If we are talking about physical attributes, I like myself the way I am. If I were a guy, I probably would find me (girl) interesting. But then, for me attraction is more to do with how the person is, not how the person looks like. Ok, may be that's more about relationship, still not really answering the question....
I like my hair color. But it will change as a person ages, umm, usually. When that happens, I may have a new definition of what is attractive.
I am not tall but I like the way I am. Because it doesn't look proportional if I get too tall.
I like my strengths- my logic, my thought process, my work ethic, my empathy/sensitivity.
I do not like my weaknesses- not outspoken enough, not good with languages, too judgemental sometimes.
I like what I like- certain scents, clean bathrooms, mango ice-cream, people with good hygiene.
Ok I don't always have good hygiene myself, especially when I am stressed out, tired, etc. But I always excuse myself by cleaning up the next day or when I feel less tired.
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