I don't often feel comfortable with eye contact because I don't want to share my feelings and I know that my eyes will give me away and make feel vulnerable. How bout you?
I don't have a problem with eye contact. I feel uncomfortable NOT making eye contact. It's a great social/interpersonal skill. It's a good way of knowing if someone doesn't like you, if they avoid looking at you.
When I'm listening or trying to understand someone I look straight into their eyes. When i don't want anyone to know what I'm thinking, or if I'm getting emotional about something, I look away.
I feel very uncomfortable with eye contact. As you said, I always think that I give away everything I feel, which is true I think. I guess it's because I'm too shy. I always look somewhere around a face. It's really hard for me to look someone straight into the eyes..
I love eye contact ^^ It can make me feel where someone is comming from, ice cold or warm and friendly!! And sometimes it feels like love at first sight because I tend to romantisize daily life situations xD
Yes I find I can look very easily at someone when they are talking, but I feel less inclined to share my eye contact with another when I am talking because I am aware of the power between two people silently occuring through interraction... I don't like my power being taken away through someone who I may not yet trust to really know me and how I work, so I think I come across a bit rude or something inicially... when I think I can trust them, I will look at them more. (I guess I don't like getting mad at myself for allowing myself to give them the power if I share myself and something bad happens)... lol, how neurotic of me! With my family (kids and friends), I share my intensity because they are good souls who love me the way I need to be loved and treated.
Of course, if they are bad souls then I turn away and probably become anxious. Then I leave and preferably find someone good who makes me calm and restored. ^^
I guess I understand that. If there is someone who I don't like or who I get negative vibes off, looking them in the eye is like revealing my emotions to them, which they'll get pleasure off exploiting. So I would avoid it in that sense but sometimes you have to be strong to people like that and develop a poker face.
I like to look at people's eyes but I feel kind of awkward looking at them for too long. Like someone previously said, I can usually know what the person's feelings(sometime's thinking) is by just looking at them and it makes me uncomfortable that they may be uncomfortable me looking at them.
I have to look into people's eyes so that I know what they are really thinking and feeling. When talking about me, however, I don't feel very comfortable with eye contact.
I usually see most people as dangerous until proven safe! No, thats just an exageration, I am interested in others of course, it's nice to sense their vibes and all... ok everyone, here's one for you. When yr in the grocery store check out line, how do you feel then about eye contact with others around you? When you get to the check out person, do you feel safe interacting with them and with eye contact with them also?
I rub my hands with excitment for yr replies!!! (yes I'm a geek...)
i often have the feeling of overpowering a person when i look into their eyes and being simultaneously overwhelmed by what i am intuiting through theirs. it is hard for me to maintain a rather matter-of-fact and steady gaze that i find many S-types are naturally able to do.
The only time I've noticed an issue with eye contact is when a friend of mine (or others) will stand abnormally close to me while they talk. I actually feel myself moving my head back and won't look them in the eyes in an attempt to protect my personal boundaries. It's funny because I speak so quietly sometimes that strangers will purposefully position themselves close to me to hear and so I experience this whole awkward conversational dance that I'm trying to work on, haha!
The only time I've noticed an issue with eye contact is when a friend of mine (or others) will stand abnormally close to me while they talk. I actually feel myself moving my head back and won't look them in the eyes in an attempt to protect my personal boundaries. It's funny because I speak so quietly sometimes that strangers will purposefully position themselves close to me to hear and so I experience this whole awkward conversational dance that I'm trying to work on, haha!
It's simply marvelous but often the other person involved thinks I hate their guts or I'm hiding something crazy. I should create a youtube account with documented proof of an incredibly introverted INFJ attempting her awkward social rituals.
It's simply marvelous but often the other person involved thinks I hate their guts or I'm hiding something crazy. I should create a youtube account with documented proof of an incredibly introverted INFJ attempting her awkward social rituals.
That would be wicked! We need more videos on INFJ-ness. Less 10 minute self interviews and more documentary footage on us in the wilderness, performing social and mating rituals. Mating rituals would preferable.
That would be wicked! We need more videos on INFJ-ness. Less 10 minute self interviews and more documentary footage on us in the wilderness, performing social and mating rituals. Mating rituals would preferable.
Definitely.
Social rituals = we'd be discovered as the most versatile personality out there, I bet.
Mating rituals = not so much. Unless we're talking about in the sack then I do believe INFJs have some super mojo. Whatever mojo really means. (But if you can find me INFJs involved in the porn industry then I'll give you ten bucks.)