Self Analysis Intrinsicly Selfish? | INFJ Forum

Self Analysis Intrinsicly Selfish?

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by IndigoSensor, Jan 28, 2010.

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  1. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    This is something that has been bothering me in the back of my mind for a while now. Is it selfish, to be constantly self-analyzing? I spend an extrodinary amount of mental power and energy being critical of my thoughts, feelings, and emotions. This is second nature to me really, I do it without making too much of a conscious though to do so. Nevertheless, all of this self-focus on figuring myself out makes me wonder if I am just being very selfish about it.

    In essence, it is as if I am wasting all of my mental power on figuring things out that apply to only myself. I have a powerful drive to understand myself at the deepest level possible. Then in turn, be able to explain it out loud to whomever will listen. This is the thing though, it is always about me, me, me, with this. I could be spending more of this energy helping others, studying, praticing something, ect. I feel like I could be using this abillity somewhere else. More for the fact that I feel guilty that I focus on myself far too much. it's unfair.

    I will tell myself that by learning more about myself, I can inturn understand the human condition more, and then help others well. This is true, but it sort of doesn't feel good enough. I do care about others, and their well being and happiness quite a bit. It isn't that I am ignoring other things, or people in place of my self-analysis. No one has witnessed (at least they haven't said so), that I am being selfish with all of this self analysis. I have tried voicing my thoughts and feelings more verbally with people, and have gotten better with it. I now feel ok talking to someone about this. When I do open up to people though, I feel like my inner thoughts and feelings come up as a topic far too much. Not everyone is going to want to hear that. I fear that people will think I am just being egotistical, needy, or in a round about way, boring by doing this. Many people won't understand me well, so the discussion would be boring for them anyway. I do watch myself with this though.

    It just feels so selfish of me, to constantly try to figure myself out. I feel bad about it, I actually feel quite bad about it. It's unfair. Yet, this is so second nature to me, that I don't think I could stop. Part of me doesn't want to anyway. Like nearly everything, it will work itself out somehow (as if my magic) eventually. That doesn't stop me from wondering/worrying though.

    So, my question to you is. Do you ever fear or feel that your constant internal processing is selfish in a way, and do you feel guilty about it at all? If you have gone through this, how have you fixed it, or worked on it? Is this even selfish at all?
     
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  2. Raccoon Love

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    Yes, this is exactly how I feel at times. I am constantly self-analyzing myself, trying to understand myself, always introspecting, everything that I do feels like it's all about me when in reality I really do want t understand myself better in other to help others, but it just feels so selfish in the process :(, I am very critical on myself to the point that others might think the only thing I care about is myself, this is not true, its just that my need to understand myself perfectly, such perfectionism sometimes gets a little to far to the point where I can be very withdrawn during such process. I am still working on this, trying not to focused so much on improving my supposed negative traits and actually pay attention to other important life matters. I do not think it is selfish, I just think that it can be misunderstood as selfishness from one part in the eys of others, there is nothing wrong with analyzing yourself.
     
  3. Reon

    Reon Midnight's Garden

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    This topic correlates with me rather well (in mbti terms, I suppose this is a Fi vs Fe problem) but I don't think self-analyzing yourself is particularly selfish. I think that you need to have a deep understanding of yourself, your biases and all that to help people, and you also need to know when you are taking on values that you think are you own but are that of other people. You won't help people if you just mimic them and make then feel ok instead of helping them. You have to stand for what you stand for, not what other people stand for. I don't think introspecting is something that needs to be fixed but I do suppose that's just my point of view.

    Does it feel like you owe other people your time? Or does it feel like you are spending to much time introspecting?
     
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  4. Raccoon Love

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    I think you indeed have a good point, but sometimes we might introspect so much that we become unaware of anything outside ourselves since we are basically constantly always criticizing our actions, this is of course to later be able to apply it but sometimes it feels that it is just selfish as basically the more you do this, the more self-centered you feel. This feeling of guilt often overtakes me.
     
  5. Reon

    Reon Midnight's Garden

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    At that point, aren't you ignoring life more than introspecting to much? Why do you feel guilty? Do you feel like you owe other people your time and emotions.
     
  6. Raccoon Love

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    Well like Indigo stated, you feel self-centered like if the world revolves around you, and as INFJ's I guess we do have a concern for applying our judgment to the world and into helping others since we use Fe, we do not only want to understand ourselves but we also want to be able to use it in some sort of way, and once that second purpose feels like its not being done we can become quite guilty about it, or at least in my opinion.
     
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  7. OP
    IndigoSensor

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    Both, but definitely much more of the former then the latter. Usually, I will feel I am introspecting too much when I notice my worldly obligations drop off.
     
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  8. Matariki

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    I don't believe its selfish to analize yourself. I believe its a very good thing to do, through analizing you can understand more about yourself and how you work. It has never crossed my mind as being selfish.
     
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  9. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    Ironically, you're analyzing yourself quite a bit in this post :) I don't think it's necessarily bad, unless it's all you think about, and you don't seem to be making any progress. Do you understand yourself better now than you did a year ago? Has this allowed you to make better choices? If the answer is yes, with some sound reasoning to back up the claim, then no, introspection has not been a selfish thing for you and has on the contrary has benefited you in better adjusting to your environment. It's worse, in my opinion, to be totally oblivious of why you do the things you do, because then you're living in ignorance, and availing yourself to any manner of detrimental consequence.
     
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  10. anica

    anica dark dreamer
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    Self Analysis Intinsically Selfish?

    This may seem in direct contradiction to my post in the Bipolar thread, but I'm extremely self-absorbed. Sometimes I think it's a direct resu;t of the bipolar; other times I think it's part of being an extreme introvert. But I think there's a distinction between self-absoption, this constant processing we do so naturally. My boyfriend described it yesterday as being less aware of other people as well as less aware of my surroundings. But I don't see that in you. I experience you as quite empathetic. Is this something upi do consciously and requires effort? Amd you share your insights, something many of us don't.
     
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  11. Morgain

    Morgain defective wisdom
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    really good!

    I'm going to turn your question around Indigo. I think that spending time to others, doing thinks to others is selfish in my case. Because when I stop self analysis and go in the world without my own values, I mimic there values (like Reon said). I do what I'm suppost to do, give them what they ask from me, do all the right things to be considered caring and loving. But to me it is all fake. I do it for my own good, to be liked and to be loved. But it is all empty. It is only when I search within me what my values are, when I love myself and accept myself for who I am, that I can make a positive contribution to others. What I do for others is only powerful and really helpful when I do it out of what I stand for! It is a contradiction, I love contradictions :becky:

    I don't know if this rambling is understandable :D
     
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  12. Gaze

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    It's like the saying, "everything in moderation" (The Bible). I think it's been good to learn more about self in terms of strengths and weaknesses, but sometimes self analysis can go too far and lead to self indulgence. I've realized, at least in my case, that i can become too involved with the idea and process of continued self analysis that my attention becomes overly focused on me, and the effect is that i don't give enough attention to others things which are more important because i'm spending too much time thinking about how i process a situation and the way it affects me. So, taken too far, self analysis can become a selfish enterprise. But self analysis is not inherently selfish. Of course, it allows us to grow and learn, but in moderation.
     
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    #12 Gaze, Jan 28, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 28, 2010
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  13. xizzax

    xizzax Community Member

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    Yes, a bit selfish... but as our fellow INTP friend says: it's better to know your motivations and reasons for doing things than living in ignorance.

    and i also agree with Restraint about everything in moderation. I'm trying more and more know to apply what I've learned about human behavior (from analysing myself) and using it to aid others.
     
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  14. INFJesus

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    From Keirsey.com and Please Understand me.

    Idealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination.

    So you seem pretty normal in that respect in regard to your type.
     
  15. Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    There are a lot of selfish people that could do with a good dose of self-analysis.
     
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  16. Gaze

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    Quite agree.
     
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  17. ec3khrl

    ec3khrl Community Member

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    I think that's just the identity crisis for many introverts, but it appears to be a good sign actually because you start to consider things with more focus on things other than yourself (which is an extroverted viewpoint). You grow when you start to see things in other ways even though you are still you.

    Extroverts have their own crisis from time to time but all in all those are times for us all to self doubt a little bit and realize there are other perspectives just as valid as ours.

    I don't think it is even a selfish thing at all to self analyze, it is more likely that you start to see yourself in a more extroverted perspective that's all.

    You are you there is nothing to feel guilty about it.
    Introverts mostly see the sun goes from east to west on the earth.
    Extroverts mostly see the earth goes around the sun.

    The fact that the earth goes around the sun will not help you navigate on earth, but it complements us with the outward reality going on beyond our self impressions about what "really happens". Both are real and just as valid.
     
  18. Beneath the surface

    Beneath the surface Regular Poster

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    My view on this is that, to gain an understanding of others, we must first strive to seek an understanding of ourselves.

    Yes, we do become a little self-absorbed in the process, but I guess that is what is required.
     
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  19. NeverAmI

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    I don't know that the action alone necessarily could be judged.

    You either need the original intent or situations with expanded context, and those would be individually labelled as selfish or not.

    As for the idea of analyzing yourself in order to become better, I think the world would be in a better state if more people did this with an expanded scope.
     
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  20. randomsomeone

    randomsomeone Well-known member

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    I tend to not analyze myself too much, but what I do do is to analyze the world around me a great deal. I guess part of this is 1) that I am basically okay with myself and 2) my place in the world and response to the same is of keener importance. Funny thing, this has been in many ways a path to self-knowledge. It's like this...staring at a hammer may yield some useful information about it, but picking it up and using it reveals even more in that one discovers how it works dynamically and the many things that can be built by using it well. There is a place for both, I guess. So....yes, self-analysis can be selfish if overdone. It can also become unproductive. Yet, moving out of a mode of self-analysis (into something perhaps less self-focussed) can still also lead to new self-awareness, and that represents growth, worthy of additional analysis if only to consolidate our new awarenesses.
     
    #20 randomsomeone, Jan 29, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2010
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