INFJ's are Sadistic! | INFJ Forum

INFJ's are Sadistic!

Chessie

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Apr 5, 2010
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Now this will blow your mind. How can an INFJ possibly be sadistic? We're deeply empathic and passionately interested in the well-being of our friends and loved ones! We actually quail at the idea of harming someone and will go to great lengths to avoid confrontations where we could injure somebody.

Look inside for a moment.

I have many INFJ friends and I want to ask flatly. Are you sadistic?

I've watched a lot of them and all of them avoid harming other people. Still, inside each is a seed of real and extremely creative violence and the capacity to cause incredible pain. Some take it as a point of personal pride that they don't hurt people despite what is an incredible capacity to do so, particularly realizing how deeply into people's heads we can get.

There's a difference between hurting someone and harming them. In our fantasies, many INFJ's cause massive damage to people. We don't talk about it. Few people looking at us would ever know the depths of violence we're capable of but that we never do expose. We live in other worlds inside our minds and explore places in our introspection that are simply too dark for most persons to ever touch willingly.

Are you sadistic?

I am a part-time dominant with a sadistic side. I would never harm someone. Never make them bleed or do anything against their will or go beyond a hard limit or disobey a safe word. I find my greatest joy in touching someone while they hurt and feeling their pain and how the pain cleans their spirit.

I also like watching someone cry. I enjoy seeing that moment when they break and the real person is right there, unabashed and weeping and for a few seconds...free. Free from the restraints of society and free from being a civilized human.

People in the BDSM community have some of the lowest rates of suicidal behavior in any sub-culture. They have one of the highest rates of relationship success, particularly if they play with kink with their partners.

In my case, I like hurting people. A lot. I would feel awful if I ever damaged someone, but hurt and harm are two different things.

I want to know the honest truth from you. When you look at people, do you ever want to cause them pain for the sake of pain? To experience pain with them or to have pain inflicted on you to clean your mind and body?
 
I suppose I am sadistic, however I am no INFJ.
 
yes I am i guess I VERY AM

i'm just hiding it ... or it comes out unexpectedly

a while ago....... I just got a knife and threatened to stab myself and someone

oh and my mom just hit me with a belt a while ago.. at first i ran and then it doesn't feel painful so whatever i don't care hit me till i die!!!!!!!!


yeah

and I like stretching myself till it hurts.. and I cry.. and I love it when I cry because of pain... it's like I can endure it forever


I'm SADISTIC whenever I'm mad and I can't control myself... I always explode!!!!!! I ALWAYS DO!!!!!!!

I just did a while a go and my relative even thought i was exorcised??

i'm scared of what i can do..... i never experienced something like what happened a while ago.. ever.... i guess......... i know i'm mad but i can't believe i'm that strong!!!!!! it's good the knife didn't slip or something

yeah iwant to cause other people pain if they cause me pain and i can't even stand up for myself... i try to keep everything in control but when it happens for several times..... ughh!!!!! i don't know how to control myself anymore.... i don't care about their feelings anymore

but the nagain.... it all comes back to me... sooner or later
 
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This is really funny and ironic. You talk about how INFJs plan out how to get in someone's head and mess them up. That sounds a lot like tertiary Ti. The tertiary function is often attributed to being the play function, but also the 'immoral' function (when there is need for 'immoral' urges).

An ENFJ friend of mine and I were at a costume party once, in a large crowded room (about 100 people).
He looks at me and says, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
I said, "That I could kill everyone in the room?"
He said, "I love you man... and not just because you were thinking what I was thinking, but because I know you were thinking it the way I was thinking it."
I nodded, "Yeah, I have everything planned out, where I'm going to start, what I'm going to do to whom."
He grinned at me with the contented smile reserved for feeling truly understood.

As best as I can tell ENFJs do the same thing, but we do it with our Se, so we plan it out physically, and are constantly aware of how to shut someone down physically. (Granted, having trained for this sort of thing my entire life probably exacerbates this... but then I don't know any male ENFJs who haven't delved very deeply into combat arts... including my buddy who's done the same for almost as long as I have.)

Edit: Otherwise, I have no interest in BDSM play. Even when I engage in playing a dom, because a partner wants it, I'm never into hurting them... just taking control of the interaction. I think this part of yourself has grown into a kink on that front.
 
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Now this will blow your mind. How can an INFJ possibly be sadistic? We're deeply empathic and passionately interested in the well-being of our friends and loved ones! We actually quail at the idea of harming someone and will go to great lengths to avoid confrontations where we could injure somebody.

Look inside for a moment.

I have many INFJ friends and I want to ask flatly. Are you sadistic?

I've watched a lot of them and all of them avoid harming other people. Still, inside each is a seed of real and extremely creative violence and the capacity to cause incredible pain. Some take it as a point of personal pride that they don't hurt people despite what is an incredible capacity to do so, particularly realizing how deeply into people's heads we can get.

There's a difference between hurting someone and harming them. In our fantasies, many INFJ's cause massive damage to people. We don't talk about it. Few people looking at us would ever know the depths of violence we're capable of but that we never do expose. We live in other worlds inside our minds and explore places in our introspection that are simply too dark for most persons to ever touch willingly.
This I agree with and relate to as an INFJ.

Are you sadistic?

I am a part-time dominant with a sadistic side. I would never harm someone. Never make them bleed or do anything against their will or go beyond a hard limit or disobey a safe word. I find my greatest joy in touching someone while they hurt and feeling their pain and how the pain cleans their spirit.

I also like watching someone cry. I enjoy seeing that moment when they break and the real person is right there, unabashed and weeping and for a few seconds...free. Free from the restraints of society and free from being a civilized human.

People in the BDSM community have some of the lowest rates of suicidal behavior in any sub-culture. They have one of the highest rates of relationship success, particularly if they play with kink with their partners.

In my case, I like hurting people. A lot. I would feel awful if I ever damaged someone, but hurt and harm are two different things.

I want to know the honest truth from you. When you look at people, do you ever want to cause them pain for the sake of pain? To experience pain with them or to have pain inflicted on you to clean your mind and body?
This I do not relate to, is this not just a fetish and referring to any type?
 
This is just... creepy.:bolt:
 
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I have a vivid, violent imagination.
 
Now this will blow your mind. How can an INFJ possibly be sadistic? We're deeply empathic and passionately interested in the well-being of our friends and loved ones! We actually quail at the idea of harming someone and will go to great lengths to avoid confrontations where we could injure somebody.

Look inside for a moment.

I have many INFJ friends and I want to ask flatly. Are you sadistic?

I've watched a lot of them and all of them avoid harming other people. Still, inside each is a seed of real and extremely creative violence and the capacity to cause incredible pain. Some take it as a point of personal pride that they don't hurt people despite what is an incredible capacity to do so, particularly realizing how deeply into people's heads we can get.

There's a difference between hurting someone and harming them. In our fantasies, many INFJ's cause massive damage to people. We don't talk about it. Few people looking at us would ever know the depths of violence we're capable of but that we never do expose. We live in other worlds inside our minds and explore places in our introspection that are simply too dark for most persons to ever touch willingly.

Are you sadistic?

I am a part-time dominant with a sadistic side. I would never harm someone. Never make them bleed or do anything against their will or go beyond a hard limit or disobey a safe word. I find my greatest joy in touching someone while they hurt and feeling their pain and how the pain cleans their spirit.

I also like watching someone cry. I enjoy seeing that moment when they break and the real person is right there, unabashed and weeping and for a few seconds...free. Free from the restraints of society and free from being a civilized human.

People in the BDSM community have some of the lowest rates of suicidal behavior in any sub-culture. They have one of the highest rates of relationship success, particularly if they play with kink with their partners.

In my case, I like hurting people. A lot. I would feel awful if I ever damaged someone, but hurt and harm are two different things.

I want to know the honest truth from you. When you look at people, do you ever want to cause them pain for the sake of pain? To experience pain with them or to have pain inflicted on you to clean your mind and body?

I'm in many ways a person who tends towards submmsssion and a touch masochistic. But nothing extreme in real world terms.

But yes I'm sadist as I'm a masochist . I think these terms are defined to rigidly everyone has these traits its just how much they manfist. Everyone has these thoughts no matter how nice they actually are. its part of who we are and what we are.

To me this isn't a type thing. Its a person thing. We can all be extremely cruel given the right circumstance. Physically mentally and so on.

I personally have a very untapped dominate side that I'm not yet comfortable with. In other words I don't' understand it and I'm unsure of how to set limits even in a soft non kink related setting. So even for example leading others. But its there and I do tend to enjoy dominating others even if I'm mostly someone who is submissive or a neutral/switch (I'm referring to the very rigid BDSM use of the term, IE I'm not a lifestyle by any stretch).

But I would never truly hurt someone I cared about. Would I spank someone, whip them play a little rough, maybe. I wouldn't push much beyond that. IE I'm not sadistic in ridge sense of the word. But again I think everyone can be pushed into a role they may not normally take if they are pushed hard enough and the circumstance presented give them the chance.

And I'm truly sadistic to someone I love/like. Not really.

Edit:

Just to clarify a Fetish is something that becomes necessary for someone to enjoy themselves and have fulfillment during sex.

A Kink is something you enjoy during sex or is arousing but not required.

For example I have furry kink but not a fetish.
 
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I tend to get flashes in my mind of the best way to kill/disable someone with what is within reach. Has been happening as long as I can remember. Am I sadistic? Nope. I've been called a masochist a few times, but never a sadist. BDSM is enjoyable to me, however I do not gain pleasure from inflicting pain but rather from the emotional bond and intense amount of trust.
 
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No, its definitely creepy, especially what VH said about killing people... wtf?

Any time I even try to really think on something like that I get turned off, I don't think I could kill someone who hasn't harmed me in some way, well I could, I could force myself through anything... but I wouldn't be able to justify it to myself.

I much more fancy myself as a dark hero or an antihero. Someone who saves people, even with violence but only if its justified. I dont think INFJs are sadistic in general, I'm pretty sure they're not. If anything we are more masochistic on average.
 
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I can feel a bit sadistic towards people I hate that have hurt me in some way, I guess, but that's about it. I think that's pretty normal, though.

I don't think I ever imagine hurting people who haven't hurt me.
 
I can feel a bit sadistic towards people I hate that have hurt me in some way, I guess, but that's about it. I think that's pretty normal, though.

I don't think I ever imagine hurting people who haven't hurt me.

Thats what I'm saying. This thread is kind of creepy in that way.
 
I like dark stuff, but blood and violence... not my thing.
 
"I also like watching someone cry. I enjoy seeing that moment when they break and the real person is right there, unabashed and weeping and for a few seconds...free. Free from the restraints of society and free from being a civilized human."

Dude, that is truly a terrifying characteristic....may want to speak to someone about that.

The other stuff that you said was fair enough....maybe, except starting a thread by saying "Now this will blow your mind."
 
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While sometimes I have the tendency to get angry and people can just piss me off easily, uurgh, I don't think I've a mean bone in my body. If someone hurts me, I wouldn't wish any ill on them. But depending on what was done, I would just put them on ignore and they'll no longer exist because I wouldn't want anything to do with them after that.
 
I think of extreme violence as a way of seeing another life, so if I imagine hurting others it's to explore that possibility.

For example: I used to wonder what might happen if I stabbed someone out of the blue, or something.

...... That sounds really creepy. D:
 
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I've noticed something in these proceeding posts and it's something I was kind of looking for. Everyone has in some way said they feel genuinely creepy talking about these things.

Even discussing parts of ourselves that are so completely against what our society says we should do and which exist regardless is difficult for us. In this post alone, in a matter of six hours, I've been told that I may have a mental illness, may be sick, may need to speak to a psychologist.

Imagine what it takes to condemn something so completely?

It takes deeply ingrained social programming. To break out of this and to explore these fantasies safely in an environment of mutual trust and enjoyment is unimaginable to many of the people here.

I want to clarify. When I speak of breaking down a person, I mean sending them into what's called 'Sub-space'. It's a mental place that people go when they've been hurt enough where they submit their will very nearly completely. It's a very pure and introspective place that can be very cleansing, like meditation. It's also VERY vulnerable.
 
chessie said:
"I want to clarify. When I speak of breaking down a person, I mean sending them into what's called 'Sub-space'. It's a mental place that people go when they've been hurt enough where they submit their will very nearly completely. It's a very pure and introspective place that can be very cleansing, like meditation. It's also VERY vulnerable."

yeah, I know what that is, it's fucking scary that you break people down to that state, it's horrific, and I'm not saying this because it's what I've been taught or conditioned, it's something that happens to people who are victims of kidnapping and what have you, it's hardcore conditioning and fucking horrifying, you could then essentially build up the person in what ever image you see fit. I am not thinking about what I've been told, I am thinking of the psychological health of a person being broken down to that state.
 
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I've watched a lot of them and all of them avoid harming other people. Still, inside each is a seed of real and extremely creative violence and the capacity to cause incredible pain. Some take it as a point of personal pride that they don't hurt people despite what is an incredible capacity to do so, particularly realizing how deeply into people's heads we can get.

There's a difference between hurting someone and harming them. In our fantasies, many INFJ's cause massive damage to people. We don't talk about it. Few people looking at us would ever know the depths of violence we're capable of but that we never do expose. We live in other worlds inside our minds and explore places in our introspection that are simply too dark for most persons to ever touch willingly.

Are you sadistic?
Absolutely.

My creative outlet is online role play, usually with the game Neverwinter Nights. I make villains on various servers and try to be as awesomely terrible as possible. One of my villains a few years ago became so famous that they're still a legend; and most players think she was a Dungeon Master created NPC; they're always surprised when I tell them it was me that played them.

Being a Dungeon Master and role-playing villains is a healthy, creative outlet for these sort of tendencies.

As for specifically sadist tendencies, I possess them to a moderate degree. My preference in villainy leans toward megalomania, however; as all my created villains are power-hungry, rather than completely violent focused... except for that one, they were fun.
 
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