INFJ and sex.
- Thread starter RecklessDreamer
- Start date
Excuse me, Why the insult and projection? I'm just posting ACCURATE information here. Ego block represents the first two functions of Ni & Fe in Socionics for an IEI. Then for the Super Ego block it's Si & Te polr. Augusta pretty much uses Freud's concept of the Ego/SuperEgo/Id very differently than Freud would. But more importantly, Model A is more generally accepted and states the functions in this order: http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.php?title=Model_A
Wikisocion website IEI profile: http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.php?title=IEI
They state that the IEI type in SOCIONICS is Ni- Fe - Si - Te - Se- Ti- Ne - Fi. I have no idea why you think the order is different??
Go look at the websites I linked before you continue to post inaccurate knowledge. They'll help you understand Socionics more, good luck.
yep, the famous function associated with... understanding.
Correlation doesn't mean translation ftr. Dostoievsky last time i checked and since i've been reading him is typed as an EII, and as far as i know he's mostly typed in MBTI as an INFJ.
Returning to the OP...
For me, sexual intimacy comes after, and never before, emotional intimacy. I've tried reversing the order but it's never nearly as fulfilling or enjoyable, as I either don't know enough about them to really maximize the romp or just don't care enough.
For me, sexual intimacy comes after, and never before, emotional intimacy. I've tried reversing the order but it's never nearly as fulfilling or enjoyable, as I either don't know enough about them to really maximize the romp or just don't care enough.
As much as I love to make connections, I really like casual sex.
Your statement doesn't apply to me. I will have sex with who I want because the girls I want to have sex with are not relationship material. If I find a girl who is relationship material (love material, depending on how you define "love"), I'll reconsider. There is a world of difference between girls I love and girls I only want to have sex with.
The point is that what I have said doesn't mean I am not on the lookout for true love. I am. It's just that, forgive my rude tone but it is going to take a lot to convince me that you aren't going to act like the cheating slut you are as soon as I let my guard down.
Your statement doesn't apply to me. I will have sex with who I want because the girls I want to have sex with are not relationship material. If I find a girl who is relationship material (love material, depending on how you define "love"), I'll reconsider. There is a world of difference between girls I love and girls I only want to have sex with.
The point is that what I have said doesn't mean I am not on the lookout for true love. I am. It's just that, forgive my rude tone but it is going to take a lot to convince me that you aren't going to act like the cheating slut you are as soon as I let my guard down.
There are people who face more issues to disengage from certain feelings than others when it comes to sex there are lots of reasons for that. I recognize that i have double standards and a lot of issues regarding this subject and i can't put my finger on where exactly it's the problem. As an INFJ and specially as a judger, we can be promiscuous as anyone, but they need to know where they are before, and make themselves a mindset, or something like that. As a judger, i need to see if the relationship is serious or not, if there are strong feelings behind or not, and if there are, it doesn't matter how much the other person may see our relationship as just a "fling", she will know my feelings, no matter what, and she will know my intentions. Not because i'm a clumsy romantic (which i am anyway lol), but because i've already made my mind and it's stupid to keep those feelings hidden, i would fail to trust her, and things will get "stuck" and i would be doing unnecessary harm to myself. It doesn't have to be verbal anyway. Maybe perceivers don't to have this "i need to know what's going on" as marked as judgers, they're more flexible, however, there's always room for exceptions, and i'm mostly rambling here.
As i study the Enneagram i can see that as a 4 of the sexual subtype (Competition/Hatred is the keyword of this subtype), these issues that surrounded me, like idealization of love, jealousy, ambivalent feelings towards sex, going grossly over-the-top with emotions, and constant self-torture for my out-of-reach romantic interest, are indeed inside my psyche, and not an outside influence.
As i study the Enneagram i can see that as a 4 of the sexual subtype (Competition/Hatred is the keyword of this subtype), these issues that surrounded me, like idealization of love, jealousy, ambivalent feelings towards sex, going grossly over-the-top with emotions, and constant self-torture for my out-of-reach romantic interest, are indeed inside my psyche, and not an outside influence.
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Sex, for the introverted intuitive feeler/thinker, is quite complex. It always revolves around our highly subjective and intensely personalized image of what it entails. (which is never one thing but is many things at once) Often it starts being one thing, those first moments when the activity commences, and then, depending upon the feelings and internal images our partner evokes, it evolves into a host of other things. With the right person, under the right circumstances, it can be reality altering. On the other hand, when things go sideways, it is empty and disturbing. Usually it is somewhere in between.
While I think in the long run sex can add to intimacy through greater understanding of ones partner, I personally do not find a great deal of emotion to be had because of the act itself. Theres a little sure, but its never an overal factor on when, why how it happens. This coming from an intj though so perhaps its irrelevant. Still I think many people become disappointed in a relationship partly because they equat the act of sex to love itself. "Why did he / she have sex with me if he / she didnt / doesnt love me?" To which there is an incredibly easy answer. Some build it up to this life changing experience this end all be all action. I find it no wonder those that do this often bemoan the outcome.
Sex has always been pretty amazing for both of us, in my experience. I've had a lot of meaningful sex and a lot of... "fun" sex. I would rank the meaningful (deep?) sex as better but the casual was great in it's on way. Passion and some sort of connection are definitely present in both and that is always what makes it.
It's true, casual sex isn't what we look for the most, the best is when your connected on every level and both go into it with the same fire.. being love drunk is mandatory for me even to be interested, but (for people who put in the love) when that door opens with an INFJ!!!!! hold on for dear life!! 
also? some good advice if your an infj or involved with one.. try s&m and/or dom/sub play.. the intensity and depth is outstanding, then when you finally merge... it's like being molded into one being i'm an aries infj and my boyfriend is a sagittarius enfp.. the sex is supernatural haha on the flipside.. i hope he never leaves me, that could kill me
also? some good advice if your an infj or involved with one.. try s&m and/or dom/sub play.. the intensity and depth is outstanding, then when you finally merge... it's like being molded into one being i'm an aries infj and my boyfriend is a sagittarius enfp.. the sex is supernatural haha on the flipside.. i hope he never leaves me, that could kill me 
I really understand that "who you love" vs "want to have sex with" .. Bit ..
I have been casual in the past because there are so few men I would consider... that if I didn't have casual sex I'd have far too extensive of periods of celibacy...
But a lot of that had to do with having no hope in a good relationship coming around.. Now, I'm being more hopeful, as lame as it sounds I'm putting myself out there in case there is someone to find
Sooooo back to celibacy.. Lol
I really understand that "who you love" vs "want to have sex with" .. Bit ..
I have been casual in the past because there are so few men I would consider... that if I didn't have casual sex I'd have far too extensive of periods of celibacy...
But a lot of that had to do with having no hope in a good relationship coming around.. Now, I'm being more hopeful, as lame as it sounds I'm putting myself out there in case there is someone to find
Sooooo back to celibacy.. Lol
As lame as it sounds, "fucking dumb sluts," is bad for the soul.
yes that is true. I get too far away from myself with casual sex.. Because I'm not connected to it an emotional capacity and it tends to bleed over throughout my whole life..
But it's hard even to have people I'm connected with understand my sex drive.. It becomes an issue with men with little experience which of course is what I like, just because they more often view sex as I do in it's pure form as an emotional experience
I deed have casual sex or rather one night stands and may do it again I guess all ENTP's do . And I do enjoy it in the process and feel good afterwards. For I do it for right reasons, for me that is a physical attraction and desire. If I don’t feel them, I don’t do it.
However I can't have friends with benefits. So if I continue having sex with a person, it’s because I develop feelings for him, and only then sex makes sense to me. Sex for the sake of sex gets boring already second time and I back out.
So if its not a one time thing, sex is highly related to my feelings and to a connection with a person. And best sex is ALWAYS related to a very deep connection with a person.
So DEEP connection= FANTASTIC sex
I guess all ENTP's do . And I do enjoy it in the process and feel good afterwards. For I do it for right reasons, for me that is a physical attraction and desire. If I don’t feel them, I don’t do it.However I can't have friends with benefits. So if I continue having sex with a person, it’s because I develop feelings for him, and only then sex makes sense to me. Sex for the sake of sex gets boring already second time and I back out.
So if its not a one time thing, sex is highly related to my feelings and to a connection with a person. And best sex is ALWAYS related to a very deep connection with a person.
So DEEP connection= FANTASTIC sex