How do you feel about eye contact, glaring, and gazing? | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

How do you feel about eye contact, glaring, and gazing?

Milon said:
Personally, I like eye contact. It shows me the person is focused on me. But maybe, like Black Swan, I've been too long in the corporate world. If someone refuses eye contact, I'm very edgy of the person. Either they don't care about me or what they're communicating, or else they're trying to hide something.
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For me it is direct eye contact, and when it is constant. I will become suspisous of peoples motives if they wont even look at my face, body, ect. It is kind of hard to explain
 
I rarely make eye contact unless the person is across from me and is the same level. If I was scared, mad or anything in between, I would just stare somewhere else. Sometimes the target happens to be my feet or shoes. Also, I feel nervous or scared when I stare straight into their pupils.
 
I always make eye contact for various reasons. I like to read what people are feeling and I also tend distrust anyone who can't make direct eye contact.
 
I think one of the reason eye contact is so difficult for me is because of the fact that it makes me too intense. It's not that I'm inattentive or mistrustful; it's that I tend to read people too well. I sense judgments, I sense a whole slew of emotions, and I tend to react too strongly to them. It's easier to just read the rest of the body language...
 
I find it uncomfortable to stare directly into the eyes of someone I'm talking to for more than 6 seconds, I will immediately look elsewhere at that point, like gloomy-optimist said, it makes me too intense too
 
Heh, just thought of another reason I like eye contact. My corner of the corporate world tends to attract a lot of females. If I don't hold eye contact, my eyes wander - I like to take in everything. And I don't like to make my female co-workers feel uncomfortable, especially because guys tend to be taller than girls. Get my drift? ;) And I've yet to be told that my stare is too intense, so I think what I'm doing now works pretty well.

EDIT: lostintranslation, you have an awesome avatar!!
 
^^ That...is a great and perfectly legitimate reason, actually.
 
It depends on the situation....

Possibilities:

Brief eye contact + small uninvasive talk/smile= usually friendly

Extended eye contact +/- invasive talk/smile +/- stalking = creepy

Eye contact, then looking away, then eye contact = shy or shady

Do not know you (i.e. strangers) + no eye contact = okay/normal

Know you (i.e. your colleague or classmate or friend) + turn the head the other way on purpose = shy/insecure or snob/superior-inferior complex
 
As for myself, I always use eye contact and nod, give some "umhmm's" to let the person who i'm talking to feel appreciated and listened to. I personally feel like it's the worst when you're saying something meaningful or passionate and the person listening is just scratching their heads and looking out the window.
A lot of people say that i'm a good listener, and I think eye contact has something to do with it.

But when it comes to eye contact romantically, I get really, really embarrassed and shy. I don't want to give away my feelings and let them see it written all over my face. I also tend to blush a lot, and I blush even more when I look into their eyes. So---hahaha pretty polar opposite. :)
 
if i have to look into someones eyes for a one on one conversation (not a group conversation) it's hard to do it....i dunno why, i've never liked looking into others eyes, it's stressful, hard, and it puts me on the defensive.
*shrugs*
but hey i wanna be a good public speaker when i get older so i better get used to looking into other ppls eyes
 
Lol well i must admit i have a staring problem (i zone off on peoples faces-or rather body parts.... usually butts) but i suck at eye-contact. When talking I usually look to the side if i dont know you or just started to know you....
y'know the one you all talk about that you stare at and make feel uncomfortable.... thats me :m142:

My INFJ really does the eye-contact thing well though, shes a professional :p... she also glares welll.. it freaks me out :m100:
 
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I have this terrible staring problem. In ways it's funny but sometimes I just can't help it. During conversations, and speaking, though, I think I'm pretty good with eye contact. There may be some moments where I feel a bit awkward, but who doesnt?
 
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I like prolonged eye contact, but not when Im trying to talk. I lose track of what I am saying.
 
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