[admins feel free to move into emotional support & advice if that's the proper place]
almost to a fault, (or maybe to a fault)...
may we discuss? what does this indicate to you?
hmmm..I always do this too...I know that they say one thing and mean another, but then I know I couldnt handle the real truth, because I always assume the worst...vicious cycle really...
I am too. I think it may be a product of my social anxiety (which I'm certain is a product of low self esteem begotten by a struggle with depression). I have, I think, degraded my own self worth to a point that I am convinced that since I don't even like myself, others must feel the same.
My reasoning says that this can't possibly be so since I have a fair amount of friends, but then the other part of me steps in and implies (and oh so persuasively) that they only hang around because they pity me in some way or another.
I am trying to overcome this, but it has proven to be a difficult task. Even as I write this, I wonder if I should really post it because I wonder if people will think of it. It scares me to be so vulnerable, but I want to challenge myself.
both the first two i would thinkWhy are you always wondering what people think about you? Is it because you feel they are judging/insecurity or do you just like knowing how you come off to people (which everyone does) Or is it something else? It kinda matters (Although, from personal experience, I can tell figuring out "why" you are wondering about what people think of you can be difficult.)
Quit saying what it's my mind. It's creepy.
I am too. I think it may be a product of my social anxiety (which I'm certain is a product of low self esteem begotten by a struggle with depression). I have, I think, degraded my own self worth to a point that I am convinced that since I don't even like myself, others must feel the same.
My reasoning says that this can't possibly be so since I have a fair amount of friends, but then the other part of me steps in and implies (and oh so persuasively) that they only hang around because they pity me in some way or another.
I am trying to overcome this, but it has proven to be a difficult task. Even as I write this, I wonder if I should really post it because I wonder if people will think of it. It scares me to be so vulnerable, but I want to challenge myself.
I hate when I have to play stupid only because people around me don't think that being smart is a positive thing. .......
I've noticed that people in general don't like too smart people or people who know too much. It makes them feel uncomfortable. I am the opposite, I love people who know more than me and are smarter than me - I can learn so many things from them! I hate when I have to play stupid only because people around me don't think that being smart is a positive thing. I am sure INFJs know what I mean .......
This is exactly my thought process, and you explained it really well.I am too. I think it may be a product of my social anxiety (which I'm certain is a product of low self esteem begotten by a struggle with depression). I have, I think, degraded my own self worth to a point that I am convinced that since I don't even like myself, others must feel the same.
My reasoning says that this can't possibly be so since I have a fair amount of friends, but then the other part of me steps in and implies (and oh so persuasively) that they only hang around because they pity me in some way or another.
I am trying to overcome this, but it has proven to be a difficult task. Even as I write this, I wonder if I should really post it because I wonder if people will think of it. It scares me to be so vulnerable, but I want to challenge myself.
Because I am perhaps overly invested in my persona, people always assume that I am smarter than I think I am. (I present as being knowledgeable, it is important to my self esteem that I not appear dumb) When (with certain people) I am in a situation where I lack understanding or functionality, my mind starts to cloud. Insecurity complexes begin to constellate and challenge my learning functions. I get a little dizzy.
well said...good answer, i like itI am not always wondering about that, but from time to time. I guess the reason is that it is important for me that the others don't have the wrong opinion/impression or more like I leave the right impression about me, the one that truly represents me. When they have the wrong impression about me I wonder if it is because I did/said something in the wrong way or if they understood it wrong. It is usually the second because I am very good in saying what I think/feel and thinking/feeling what I say. Yes, usually I use long sentences and detailed explanations which might confuse some but oh well, this is how I am. I've noticed that people in general don't like too smart people or people who know too much. It makes them feel uncomfortable. I am the opposite, I love people who know more than me and are smarter than me - I can learn so many things from them! I hate when I have to play stupid only because people around me don't think that being smart is a positive thing. I am sure INFJs know what I mean .......
I agree with all of the posts above about self-esteem. Those hit the nail on the head for me as well.
While I am working on developing a self esteem to resemble the one I had as a child, I'm sort of disturbed by what passes for 'proper self-esteem' in the adults around me. It doesn't feel healthy.
Some people I have gotten to know have opened up to me to reveal truly disturbing patterns in the opposite direction-- self-inflated and other-degraded. They seem happy and stable, but they live in a perpetual fantasy about their own worth. That doesn't strike me as healthy for any of us.
RememberIfItRained, imagine if your wish were fulfilled. Imagine what the world would be like if everyone's thought processes were advertised on their foreheads. It would be a frightening world at first, but how would it change us?