Your depth of feeling... More of a blessing or a curse? | INFJ Forum

Your depth of feeling... More of a blessing or a curse?

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by Sesquipedalian, Feb 12, 2009.

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  1. It's a blessing.

    24 vote(s)
    72.7%
  2. It's a curse.

    9 vote(s)
    27.3%
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  1. Sesquipedalian

    Sesquipedalian Community Member

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    I'm from www.intjforum.com and there have been threads on there where we discuss how our gifts of intelligence and knowledge seem to be more of a curse than a blessing more often than not...

    The more I get to know my INFJ the more I realize how her depth of feeling is probably miserable at times... ...to be controlled by your feelings rather than yourself... To have trouble distancing yourself from emotionally charged situations and they way you absorb others' feelings in an almost magnetic, sponge-like way.

    I was wondering... As those inclined toward feeling, would you say your depth of feeling tends more to be a blessing or a curse?
     
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    #1 Sesquipedalian, Feb 12, 2009
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2009
  2. efromm

    efromm Hiding In My Shell...
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    I love it and hate it at times. You need a balance and at times it can cripple you. I just cant imagine being any other way and taking the good with the bad is just a part of life.
     
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  3. arbygil

    arbygil Passing through

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    You should add a few new radio buttons: Both, Neither, and Sometimes. :D It all applies.
     
  4. PsilocinProject

    PsilocinProject Community Member

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    I used to hate being controlled by things. As a child, emotions controlled me... So, I threw them away. I started getting too smart for my own age and could look at all the possibilities of a single situation. Things started scaring me because I knew all of the bad outcomes. I started cursing my own knowledge.

    Now, I've learned to not give a fuck and embrace my intellect. Emotions, well... I still feel(Kinda) them but I completely blow dicks at paying attention to them and showing them. I don't hate the fact that, in my naive way of thinking, I snuffed out my own feelings. It was a time of growing for me; even if that direction wasn't right. At least I learned and I'm trying to get more connected.

    But I'm not as emotional as most of you in the first place. So, I don't know how you all feel about your own growth.
     
  5. Pristinegirl

    Pristinegirl Well-known member

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    right now my mentality is awesome, so I would say a blessing ^^
    Because when the feelings are good - then it will be EPIC.
    Hence when the feelings are bad - then it will be horrible.
     
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  6. efromm

    efromm Hiding In My Shell...
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    How does it apply?
     
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  7. arbygil

    arbygil Passing through

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    For me it does, because it depends. It can be a blessing when I'm trying to help someone. It can be a curse when I'm frustrated at myself for doing something foolish. It can be neither when I'm reading a book or seeing a movie and not paying attention to how I'm feeling (I'm simply "experiencing"). It can be both when I'm helping someone and I'm frustrated at them at the same time, because I know the truth - and I know they're getting there but not getting it. Which I guess is the same as saying "Sometimes", too.
     
  8. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    exactly :)
     
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  9. Ender612

    Ender612 Community Member

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    Ditto (#3)...reminds me of something I was thinking about a month or so ago, on how INFJs seem to have this handle (whether we want it or not) to sometimes get a good understanding of people's motivations for their actions...even the less savory ones.
     
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  10. Forgotten Rose

    Forgotten Rose Community Member

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    Well, I always follow my emotions and feelings when I have to make some kind of decision, so I consider it a blessing... even if the outcome doesn't turn out good.
    I see it as a blessing because... I wouldn't be me if I didn't follow my feelings.
     
  11. Lynx

    Lynx Newbie

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    Although it hurts sometimes, I view it as a blessing...

    My feelings have never led me astray - not when I truly listened to them at least. While it might have hurt at the moment, it turned out to be much better.
    The problem I tend to run into is "feeling" other people... If someone who I am close to is sad, upset, angry, etc etc etc I tend to pick up on that and react also. While this is good sometimes, it can lead to a lot of problems too. As I've gotten older I've learned to 'tune out' what I don't need to react to and can be a bit more objective about things.
     
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  12. Ambrosia Lemon

    Ambrosia Lemon Regular Poster

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    I would say it is more of a blessing that curse. It helps me understand the world around me and myself. I really don't know how I would fuction without feelings or trying to brush them aside. But hey that is how my brain works.
     
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  13. Silently Honest

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    It's neither, it's something you have and you have to, as I've heard twice before on this forum "own". Does it suck sometimes yeah, is it awesome sometimes, hell yeah, but I don't view it any worse or better then anything else.
     
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  14. gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    I've had periods in my life where I've lost touch with my depth of feeling. I have a strong Ti, and when I get stressed, a lot of time I find that I get lost in intellectual logic.
    It's so empty. I don't like feeling disconnected in that way. Sure, I'm still disconnected as an emotional INFJ, but at least then, there's passion; there's drive....

    I'd rather love the world and have that love slowly break my heart, than break the world apart logically until the pointlessness of the world wilts me away to nothing....
     
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  15. TK*

    TK* Community Member

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    It's a blessing because it is ME, my depth of feelings are a part of ME! This is who I am and I'm proud of it. I wouldn't trade that for anything; even when my feelings turn me into something ugly--it's still me. Without those moments, I couldn't learn from them.
     
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  16. OP
    Sesquipedalian

    Sesquipedalian Community Member

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    I put only two options for a reason ;). I wanted everyone's overall perspective on what their emotions are to them. Are they more often a blessing, or more often a curse? It can only be one or the other ultimately.
     
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  17. arbygil

    arbygil Passing through

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    Lol! You're such a T-ease...;)
     
  18. Ophelia

    Ophelia Community Member

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    Meh, why can't both be one of the options for the poll?
     
  19. yepunsarang

    yepunsarang Community Member

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    Well, like other people have stated, having an immense aptitude for feeling---i'd like to also put in, sensitivity--- is a double-edged sword. Because of this, you've to be aware of how much feeling you've got and use it in positive light.

    For me, I know that i'm really sensitive, not exactly the same thing as feeling---more the ability to feel strongly. There are many negatives to this---being hurt easily, drawing yourself away from others or society, intensely feeling the pain, darkness of the world, and being really abstract. But at the same time, I feel like my way of thinking and perception is a gift. Because of my sensitivity, I have this intense passion to help others and the world, something really genuine that much of the world doesn't have and needs. This sensitivity has also made me really strong to protect that inside. We also tend to see beauty easier than others I think---being able to see and feel things others can't really see is a gift.

    We have lots of potential to help others, make the world brighter, understand complex things and such... But sure, some days I just wish I was "normal"---but after those moments, I realize how I (and we) should NEVER wish that...
     
  20. ZenCat

    ZenCat Waving Sage

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    I decided to be brutally honest and declare it a curse, since I only had the two options.

    Honestly, I think I'd be a lot happier if I could tone it down, even just a little.

    Clearly I wouldn't be "me" without this level of feeling, but I think I would be happier if I felt a little less sharply about a whole bunch of things. But again, this is merely speculation. Maybe I wouldn't be happier after all. But then again, maybe I wouldn't obsess about whether... ugh. Nevermind.

    *shrug*
     
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