What are your turn-offs? | INFJ Forum

What are your turn-offs?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by dneecey, Jan 4, 2010.

Share This Page

Watchers:
This thread is being watched by 7 users.
More threads by dneecey
  1. dneecey

    dneecey I am who I am.

    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2009
    Threads:
    132
    Messages:
    3,528
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    877
    Trophy Points:
    593
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    9w1
    So this is something like the what makes you angry thread and the what are your top 3 turn ons thread? That being said... what are your turn offs? What are deal breakers for you, and what is not really sexy but you're willing to tolerate... ie... smoking, preference in pets, taste in music...etc....
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  2. NaeturVindur

    NaeturVindur Cuddlemaster
    Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2008
    Threads:
    86
    Messages:
    3,686
    Likes Received:
    265
    Trophy Points:
    641
    MBTI:
    iNfj
    Enneagram:
    9w1
    smoking's the first thing to come to mind. it disgusts me, and, frankly, I ain't kissin' that mouth. I guess I'm also a little bit of a christian-phobe. I prefer my pagans and atheists, but I'm ok with most christians (kinda have to be, they're hard to avoid).
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    dneecey likes this.
  3. Matariki

    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2009
    Threads:
    106
    Messages:
    3,491
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    498
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    N/A
    Enneagram:
    N/A
    Smelliness
    Messiness
    Laziness
    Close mindedness
    Unkindness
    Selfishness

    And just general stupidity.

    Unfortunately all humans to an extent come with these qualities.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #3 Matariki, Jan 4, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2010
  4. Raccoon Love

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2009
    Threads:
    310
    Messages:
    5,413
    Likes Received:
    703
    Trophy Points:
    657
    Gender:
    Female
    MBTI:
    INFP
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Unkind
    Selfish
    Close-Mindness
     
  5. Soulful

    Soulful life is good

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Threads:
    249
    Messages:
    5,014
    Likes Received:
    713
    Trophy Points:
    245
    MBTI:
    Turns offs:

    Someone who (is): dishonest, paranoid, generally distrusting in the relationship, judgmental, shallow, assumptious, cynical, emotionally cold, prone to angry outbursts, yells, violent, mean, lacks integrity, selfish, obnoxious, dominates conversations, uncommunicative, unmotivated or lazy, personally competitive, needs validation, overly cautious and playing it safe most of the time, controlling, unconstructively critical of others, believes the world's going to hell in a handbasket, uptight, unable to be spontaneous (I tend to feel more relaxed around Ps vs. Js), rigid, unable to relax and let things go, holds grudges, argumentative, blames others and holds them responsible for their lack of success in the world, lack of self-awareness, poor communication especially if reflective of a lack of self-awareness, disrespectful, punitive, immature, close-minded, smug... I could keep going but I think this is beyond long enough.
     
    dneecey likes this.
  6. Crow

    Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2010
    Threads:
    9
    Messages:
    315
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ INTJ
    Nearly everything about people turns me off.
    So that becomes not the issue.
    The issue becomes:
    In spite of being turned off,
    what is there that I can endure while I discover the real person.

    Usually, the real person is nowhere to be seen.
    But once in a while, I get a pleasant surprise.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  7. Billy

    Billy Contents Under Pressure
    Donor

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2009
    Threads:
    95
    Messages:
    4,826
    Featured Threads:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,249
    Trophy Points:
    381
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    CT
    MBTI:
    infj
    Enneagram:
    ....
    apathy
    jealousy
    slovenliness
    laziness
    short sightedness
    bad teeth
    breast implants
    horrible acne
    and general uncleanliness
     
  8. Flavus Aquila

    Flavus Aquila Finding My Place in the Sun
    Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2009
    Threads:
    323
    Messages:
    10,047
    Featured Threads:
    49
    Likes Received:
    5,613
    Trophy Points:
    1,102
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Australia
    MBTI:
    INTJ - A
    Enneagram:
    10000
    Bad breath

    Bad manners

    Insincerity
     
  9. blueparade

    blueparade Regular Poster

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2010
    Threads:
    1
    Messages:
    60
    Likes Received:
    5
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Bad hygiene, clingy behaviour, insensitivity
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  10. INFJesus

    Banned

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    Threads:
    4
    Messages:
    197
    Likes Received:
    33
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    ISFP
    Being rude. I mean if someone loves or likes me I deserve their manners, even during conflict, especially during conflict

    Doing one thing saying another.

    Manipulation. I admit to falling victim to this because I am eager to please my love..

    On the flip side, I am probably guilty of these myself
     
    dneecey likes this.
  11. enigma

    enigma Armed and Fabulous!

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2008
    Threads:
    68
    Messages:
    1,275
    Likes Received:
    147
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    infj
    Enneagram:
    1w9
    Smoking and chewing. ew.
    Arrogance, being rude/mean to others.
    being disrespectful to me.
    tons of piercings do not do anything for me.
    Pants hanging off your ass
    constant sarcasm - it is not attractive
    a need to constantly talk politics and religion etc, drives me nuts.
    boring in bed? see ya. I need more than just lovey-lovey.
    Wimps: grow a set. Mine should not be bigger than yours. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
    :m049:
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  12. Faye

    Faye ^_^
    Staff Member Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2009
    Threads:
    311
    Messages:
    7,278
    Featured Threads:
    4
    Likes Received:
    4,613
    Trophy Points:
    892
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Gridania
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    For me:

    1. Poor hygiene, especially smoking.
    2. Obese or extremely thin.
    3. Has children already.
    4. Lack of emotional intelligence.
    5. Country Music.


    I think that is pretty much it. The most important thing on my list is #4. I'll tolerate #5 if she agrees to not play or sing the music around me. Most of these are fairly straightforward except for #4, which is subjective for me. The best way I can describe it is that I can't tolerate a person who settles for terrible emotional states of being and all that those situations entail. I need someone who is sensitive to those issues and is willing to work to maintain their mental and spiritual health holistically. Also, our lifestyles wont be very compatible if they don't care about those things.

    I would rather go single that be with someone who has lacks emotional intelligence. I realize I have high standards, but I would honestly live my alone than live it with someone who is in such a deprived state of being.

    Damn, that is a long list.
     
  13. DevilDoll

    DevilDoll Beware! I Bite...

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2009
    Threads:
    35
    Messages:
    2,096
    Likes Received:
    412
    Trophy Points:
    627
    MBTI:
    INTP
    Enneagram:
    5w6
    Stupidity. Well, when I say stupidity I mean more along the lines of people who lack the desire to learn. Say I am trying to explain something to them, something that I find incredibly interesting and they are off in lala land, thinking about the next time we are going to have sex or how to get me to shut up. If I buy a guy a book I hope he actually reads it, not uses it as a paper weight. I want someone who can mentally challenge me. I want to have conversations about things other than your car or your gaming system. Yes, I am a gamer and that interests me, but not 24 hours a day seven days a week. I need something a bit more stimulating.

    I also despise liars, and I include omission in this too. Some people think if they just "forget" to mention it, that it's not dishonest. Hiding things can be worse than telling me an outright lie. I try to be as honest as I can be and I expect the same thing from my partner.

    Other turn offs include attempting to change me, lack of hygiene, disrespect, a love for rap music, manipulation, immaturity, guys that let me walk on them for the sake of "love" (grow a spine), being smothered (I need me time!), extremely right wing conservatives, hellfire and brimstone christians (I hate being told I am going to hell. It's obnoxious.), judgmental people, drama queens/kings.... I could go on and on.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  14. Blackrazor6

    Blackrazor6 DirtyDeedsDoneDirtCheap

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2009
    Threads:
    3
    Messages:
    61
    Likes Received:
    11
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    IN(T/F)J
    1. Arrogance
    2. Narcissism
    3. Smoking
    4. Heavy conformists
    5. Bad hygene

    The usuals:m025:
     
  15. Celsius100

    Celsius100 Community Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2009
    Threads:
    5
    Messages:
    218
    Likes Received:
    18
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    -Poor hygiene
    -Being a robot
    -Heavy Smoking, though I can handle being around the lighter stuff
    -Close-mindedness
    -Generally cruel behavior towards others
    -Distaste for creativity
    -Strong apathy
    -Darwin Award Candidacy (the people who are the reason that obvious warnings exist on labels)

    ... to be honest though, there's usually not even a turn-on unless something kinda clicks over time regardless. I'm probably too picky about this stuff for my own good.
     
    #15 Celsius100, Jan 13, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2010
  16. Pristinegirl

    Pristinegirl Well-known member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Threads:
    36
    Messages:
    3,085
    Likes Received:
    127
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    ANFP
    Added to my list of turn-offs:

    Consumerism
    Walmart
    McDonald's
    US psychiatry mentality
    Realism
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    acd likes this.
  17. Gaze

    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2009
    Threads:
    2,381
    Messages:
    28,280
    Featured Threads:
    94
    Likes Received:
    22,833
    Trophy Points:
    1,906
    MBTI:
    INFPishy
    well . . . arrogance, poor listening skills, insensitivity, and selfishness.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #17 Gaze, Jan 14, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2010
  18. INFJesus

    Banned

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    Threads:
    4
    Messages:
    197
    Likes Received:
    33
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    ISFP
    Isn't the fact that we have turn offs, selfish,arrogant and insensitive to others by it's very nature??
     
  19. NaeturVindur

    NaeturVindur Cuddlemaster
    Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2008
    Threads:
    86
    Messages:
    3,686
    Likes Received:
    265
    Trophy Points:
    641
    MBTI:
    iNfj
    Enneagram:
    9w1
    No.

    Do you like every painting you see? I'm going to assume not, but by your logic, its insensitive to the artist to not love it. Even better example, do you love every person you, or even like them all? Again, I assume not. Personal preference isn't selfish, arrogant, nor insensitive. Its simply preference.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
  20. GaiaGraha

    GaiaGraha Community Member

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2009
    Threads:
    11
    Messages:
    555
    Likes Received:
    69
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4
    Also a Christian-a-phobe.....I still have friends that are Christian, but I can't date a Christian- they always want to change me, no funfun.
    Other turn-offs: People who are not Genuine, Stupidity, Bad Spelling/Grammar, Ignorance, Homophobia, Sexism, Clingyness, Lack of Ambition, Followers/Sheep, Bad Listeners, and.....people who have bad hygiene (smelly=bad, haha)
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
Loading...

Share This Page