These are the INFJ forums!

[Lucifer]

Maybe you should make a disclaimer part like they have on INTJ forum.

But then again on that one it is a joke.

 

[Shai Gar]

*you're

 

[VH]

Okay then...

I think saying that you don't want anyone to leave is kind of a cop out after posting this. Obviously, you do.

I'm so glad you're here to read my mind for me. I thought I was posting exactly what I thought and felt in very clear and concise language. I can't imagine how I've been able to get along in life this long without someone to read my mind for me and explain to me that what I really meant was nothing even remotely resembling what I said.

Way to go. You took something personally, misconstrued it, and made assumptions all in one fell swoop. I love it when that happens. I love it so much I posted a thread about it. Oh wait. It was this one.

Or you want people who don't think like you to shut up. Ok.

And another wonderful gem of taking something personally, misconstruing it, and making assumptions. I don't want anyone to leave, nor do I want anyone to shut up. Satya did a great job of summating my intention here, I just want everyone to play nicer, and stop blasting us for what you think we meant.

So happens that a few members here originally joined thinking they were INFJs, and then came to the conclusion that they were not. Myself included, of course. Along the way we made friends with people here and found that we really enjoyed posting here--regardless of type.

And we're all glad you're here. INFJs make great friends, confidants, and counselors. We're happy to fill this role. All I'm saying is that there is a certain behavior that is cropping up lately that is toxic to us. Take a look at the posts that agree with me, and you'll see that I'm expressing a concern that a lot of the other INFJs are feeling but not stepping up to address because they're likely avoiding the insuing flack about it. Could you just stop for a minute, think about this, and possibly conclude that this is a simple change that would make us happy? Are you guys even capable of not blasting us when you disagree?

I am totally sick of the marginalizing that goes on in mbti. Really? You can only relate to people who think exactly like you? You can only feel safe and secure and comfortable around people who share the same personality as you?

No, we love having people around who don't act like us. We just want you guys to honor our sensibilities when you're in our house. And we're not asking for much. Just be nicer to us, and think about what we've said, and then consider how you're reacting to it before you reply.

Imagine that we have an incredible sensitivity to noise and commotion, and we live in a world where everything is noisy and constantly bustling. We just want a place where people respect that we want as little of that as possible, because we're very sensitive to it.

How many disagreements on here are between INFJs? Take a gander; there's quite a few.
Don't blame the bickering on non-INFJ types, because it's not all us.

Disagreements are not only acceptable, they're welcomed. What I'm asking for is a conscious effort to stop the bickering. Bickering, like what we're doing now, is highly distinct from disagreements and discourse.

If you need cuddles, maybe you should be kind instead of alienating people. You only get what you give.

Really? I gave a statement and a request. I got misconstrued and chastised. That doesn't at all look like I got what I gave. In fact, I'm being attacked for asking people to stop attacking one another. Sucks doesn't it?

 

[Quinlan]

I'm completely ok with the gist of this thread, if that is really what you guys want. I'm just saying if that is where the forum is heading, a place where we have to agree and be accepting of everything INFJ, I don't know if I personally want to post in a place where I am constantly walking on eggshells and have to check my every post to see if it fits a standard that isn't even stated in the forum rules.

As an F it just seems like the easier thing to do is to leave, that way I know for sure that I'm not offending or intruding on anyone.

 

[sumone]

Von, I made this one a while back. Thought you might enjoy it!

And zillions of cuddles for you von! I knew your spirit in writing it and I think you did a very good job of it. I never got the impression that you wanted anyone to leave and I think we all agree we love our other type friends. I'm impressed with the ones who have made this their home, we've been so very lucky.
But with the size of this place now I think what you said should be said now and then. Just to set the record straight.
Like bickering. There are some people who would come on here just to test our mettle and then come to the conclusion that we're cowards because we don't bicker back. How many times do we have to explain it?? lol

 

[Shai Gar]

VH, how about for mutual understanding, you repost your original post, in a way that takes into account your later qualifications for the statements.

because this is starting to become a thread fight, and i'm sure it's not what you intended.

I personally read it through carefully and thought you meant for those of us who weren't INFJs to leave. I read the thread through as well and it's not what you meant, so qualifications would be a definite aid in this situation.

 

[VH]

Von, I made this one a while back. Thought you might enjoy it!

BWAHAHAHAHA

And zillions of cuddles for you von! I knew your spirit in writing it and I think you did a very good job of it. I never got the impression that you wanted anyone to leave and I think we all agree we love our other type friends. I'm impressed with the ones who have made this their home, we've been so very lucky.
But with the size of this place now I think what you said should be said now and then. Just to set the record straight.
Like bickering. There are some people who would come on here just to test our mettle and then come to the conclusion that we're cowards because we don't bicker back. How many times do we have to explain it?? lol

I completely agree and couldn't have said it better.

 

[VH]

VH, how about for mutual understanding, you repost your original post, in a way that takes into account your later qualifications for the statements.

because this is starting to become a thread fight, and i'm sure it's not what you intended.

No, this thread fight is the opposite of what I intended, yet ironically proves my point.

 

[Shai Gar]

damnit, you quoted me while i was editing in a new sentence.

 

[The Jester]

@ Shai: sorry if it looked like I was trying to fight or something, because that's the last thing I want at the moment, it's midnight and it would be ungrateful to VH, I was simply trying to type out how I thought it came across.
If I'm too agressive or anything, you can delete my post. I'm too tired to have a 'filter' right now.

 

[VH]

damnit, you quoted me while i was editing in a new sentence.

Can you clarify what caused you to think I was asking people to leave? I thought I made it really clear that I want everyone to be here, and opened the thread with such sentiment.

I've noticed that there are a lot of other types here, and we welcome you guys. We really do.

This thread was supposed to be a little brochure on the proper care and handling of the INFJs on this forum.

 

[The Jester]

Can you clarify what caused you to think I was asking people to leave? I thought I made it really clear that I want everyone to be here.

It's just that if you treat groups different and give people labels (okay this was before, but this thread sort of confirmed it) it creates friction.

But I think this was about to happen any moment.

 

[Blind Bandit]

It's just that if you treat groups different and give people labels (okay this was before, but this thread sort of confirmed it) it creates friction.

But I think this was about to happen any moment.

No Von was calling out the elephant in the room that no one wanted to talk about.

 

[acd]

How about you please have some respect for the members who have been posting here much longer than yourself. Other people who have established this forum and built connections so that you could post here.

I think that calling this place your home while excluding non-infjs as "visitors" is very inflammatory. Visitors, might I remind you again, who have established this forum or at least been here longer than yourself.

If you're not an INFJ, you are visiting here. Please treat these forums with the respect you would (or at least should) treat someone else's home, and please consider us your hosts.

Think of this place like a refuge for the rare and elusive INFJs, a wide open place where you get to observe us as we live and behave as we do in the wild. This is to help the almost extinct INFJ population, and is solely for the benefit of the INFJs, and those who seek to learn from us. If you come into the refuge, you're coming into our territory, so be wary. It's not a zoo, and we're not in cages for you to tap on the glass and annoy us. We're not here for your amusement.

How is that not offensive? It's like being scolded or talked down to.

 

[VH]

No Von was calling out the elephant in the room that no one wanted to talk about.

...and I'm trying to shoot it, if everyone would just duck and give me a clear shot.

 

[VH]

I think that calling this place your home while excluding non-infjs as "visitors" is very inflammatory.

Then we should change the name to forums.for.MBTI.but.infjs.come.here.too.com


Edit... but you make a good point about how some people might see that statement in a way other than I intended, so I took it out.

 

[Blind Bandit]

How about you please have some respect for the members who have been posting here much longer than yourself. Other people who have established this forum and built connections so that you could post here.

I think that calling this place your home while excluding non-infjs as "visitors" is very inflammatory.

I assume you where talking to von here but I must shoot this down

Seniority is not relevant in the slightest. There is no need to strong arm with claims of seniority because its waste of breath. I've dealt with more of my share. I've been on forums a long time. Been there done that.

Seniority on a forum means nothing to me.

...and I'm trying to shoot it, if everyone would just duck and give me a clear shot.

I know, I've seen this issue before.

Its such a pain.

 

[Shai Gar]

If you think that's even slightly possible you don't understand how the internet works.

 

[slant]

I always liked the INFJ forums because they treated me like I was one of them, they didn't try to imply that I didn't belong here or that I needed to 'watch my words' when dealing with them. When I went to INTPcentral, I experienced many cocky remarks on my type and how I was inferior to them. INFJs are quite accepting and laid back--- so this thread doesn't make sense to me.

 

[Blind Bandit]

If you think that's even slightly possible you don't understand how the internet works.

What

If you mean seniority. I guess once you have been on all sides, member staff, near or top post, and so on. it doesn't matter anymore.