Physical Contact | INFJ Forum

Physical Contact

IndigoSensor

IndigoSensor

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Nov 12, 2008
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This is something that I have been aware of about me for a while now, but it just came to the surface again (i.e. randomly remembered it).

I have a pretty adversal reaction to physical contact. With my mom, or very close friends, I will usually not go beyond a hug or something to that respect. When I am hugged by them though, it is conforting. However, with other people, I have a strong reaction to it. It usually leaves me feeling embaressed, akward, or just plain unconfortable. For example, if people are playing a game or something and it requires everyone to hold hands in a circle, it will really bother me. This is also one (along with several others) reason why I hate crowded elevators, because you have to brush up agients someone. And of someone reaches out to touch me or something, I usually back away. And no, I wasn't harmed in any way as a child (people seem to think this is a cause to it).

I wonder if this has to do with my very low Si and Se, or if it is something else. Does anyone else feel this way?
 
I don't like crowds and I don't like being touched except by those select few that I have grown to be comphortable with. Quite frankly I think it's an issue with personal space and sometimes just "Who the fuck do you think you are hugging me?"
 
I'm similar so I doubt it's an Se thing.
 
People are always busting personal space boundaries. When did hugging strangers and co-workers become so popular? I hate it.
 
I used to hate touch of any kind from anyone. Even from "family." Different circumstances surrounded that, though. My folks didn't use touch to express love and affection; touch was solely used negatively or for punishment. I only really allowed myself to give hugs and things like that to my little brother. Until high school, I would flinch when someone reached out their hand towards me. I got over my touching phobia by just allowing people to touch me--and I guess at heart I was always a bit of a sappy person. With the security from those who loved me, I've branched out touching others again. Now I absolutely love giving hugs and receiving hugs. I still prefer not to use touch as much as my other methods for giving affection/information, but I've certainly gotten much better about the whole touching thing.
 
I react strong to physical touch as well. But not in that way, instead I am emotionally aroused. I love it. I acknowledge any touch and anticipate it whether it is a hug or a clap on the shoulder. It gives me the *bambi eyes* due to feeling 'aaaaaaaaw' ^^
 
I am kinda reserved when it comes to being touched. I am a little more open about it than I used to be. It took me 2 years to let a friend of mine hug me. I am not very good at giving hugs or anything like that.
 
I don't like being touched by people I don't know or I don't like. It's strange because jiu-jitsu is very contact/touch oriented. I used to get a bit claustrophobic when I started, but because my mind is otherwise engaged, it's not as bad. I hate being touched by crowds also. It's rare that I'll let someone I don't know very well touch me (hug or anything). If someone i don't know does touch me, and it's not so bad, they're usually special.

The only exception to this rule I think is with kids. Most little kids think I'm some sort of strange looking jungle gym, and they start climbing, which for some reason doesn't bother me at all. My nephew crawls all over me, and then will just up and fall asleep on my chest, which is pretty awesome.
 
I'm rocking the Ne, and I don't like it very much either. I'm pretty rigid about my personal space. You don't enter it without permission, or I'll eff you up. Metaphorically speaking.
 
I dislike any social touching, even from family members. I'm fine with handshakes, but hugs are irritating.
I'm okay with being in packed crowds and with sparring, however. It's only when the person touching me is doing so with some social intention that I dislike it.
 
TheLastMohican said:
I dislike any social touching, even from family members. I'm fine with handshakes, but hugs are irritating.
I'm okay with being in packed crowds and with sparring, however. It's only when the person touching me is doing so with some social intention that I dislike it.
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On the contrary that is something I cannot handle: being packed in crowds.
 
I could be considered bi-polar about being in contact with others.

I can be in contact with others for long periods of time. But when the boundries go up....I don't want anyone in the three foot bubble around my body. It produces the same feeling as claustrophobia and I feel a need to run away. Or worse, if I am somewhere that I can't move away, I feel the need to lash out violently.

My ES husband has gotten smacked, kneed, hit and shoved over furniture a few times when he fails to listen to my verbal warnings to leave me alone. Or when I do move away from contact and he follows me....

ON the other side of the bi-polar fence, I enjoy being up front at concerts, at theatre shows, sporting events. Once again tho, time is a factor. Those are usually events that are rather short in duration therefor not stretching my tolerance for space invasion.
 
I don't like being touched by anybody but those I'm close to and trust.

That is, assuming that it's not the most beautiful woman in the world coming up and rubbing my crotch. Then I might make an exception.
 
alcyone said:
I could be considered bi-polar about being in contact with others.

I can be in contact with others for long periods of time. But when the boundries go up....I don't want anyone in the three foot bubble around my body. It produces the same feeling as claustrophobia and I feel a need to run away. Or worse, if I am somewhere that I can't move away, I feel the need to lash out violently.

My ES husband has gotten smacked, kneed, hit and shoved over furniture a few times when he fails to listen to my verbal warnings to leave me alone. Or when I do move away from contact and he follows me....

ON the other side of the bi-polar fence, I enjoy being up front at concerts, at theatre shows, sporting events. Once again tho, time is a factor. Those are usually events that are rather short in duration therefor not stretching my tolerance for space invasion.
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I'm pretty physically affectionate when in a relationship.

When any of in INFx ex's has pulled that crap, they were immediately tickled until near involuntary urination.

ENTP's: nature's anti-depressant.
 
hughnibley said:
I'm pretty physically affectionate when in a relationship.

When any of in INFx ex's has pulled that crap, they were immediately tickled until near involuntary urination.

ENTP's: nature's anti-depressant.
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Ha. My friends once made the mistake of trying to tickle me. There is a fate worse than death, and tickling is it. I defended myself from death by laughter. Tickling is evil, unless I'm very physically AND emotionally attracted to the tickler. Then it's only SLIGHTLY less evil.
 
The tickling will continue until morale improves.
 
I think I am the odd ball in this. I like to be comforted when I am sad... and one way is by hugs. I would give hugs to like only 2 very close family members, my mom and extremely close cousin. Outside of that, I have other people hugged me before. Mostly, it have been in a church settings. One thing when we meet like old friend is just a causal hug. I was really jumpy about it at first. ( In fact, when we were praying by holding hands in a circle, it would get me all uncomfortable.) Now, after unlimited time with them at all sorts of gatherings and mass, I am fairly used to getting and giving hugs even to people i barely know.

Well, I get really uncomfortable when teachers or strangers on the streets or such touch me.
 
hughnibley said:
The tickling will continue until morale improves.
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Funny. You have no idea what kinds of beasts come out when I'm tickled...:)
And these are not warm and fuzzy beasts...
 
SoDistant said:
I think I am the odd ball in this. I like to be comforted when I am sad... and one way is by hugs. I would give hugs to like only 2 very close family members, my mom and extremely close cousin. Outside of that, I have other people hugged me before. Mostly, it have been in a church settings. One thing when we meet like old friend is just a causal hug. I was really jumpy about it at first. ( In fact, when we were praying by holding hands in a circle, it would get me all uncomfortable.) Now, after unlimited time with them at all sorts of gatherings and mass, I am fairly used to getting and giving hugs even to people i barely know.

Well, I get really uncomfortable when teachers or strangers on the streets or such touch me.
Click to expand...

If I met you, I would start by tickling until you urinated.

It is kind of how I mark my territory.
 
I used to dislike physical contact, and had a lot of problems with it but now I can handle it pretty easily. Sometimes its comforting or exhilerating even (depends on who from). Unexpected physical contact can still make me jump sometimes, or otherwise put my body into fight or flight mode until I realize that its harmless.
 
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