Our masks | INFJ Forum

Our masks

Jana

Jana

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Apr 18, 2009
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We all have masks sometiimes on our faces? They help us to deal with people that confuse us, our fears, troubles etc.
I noticed that I most often care mask of silly and somehow childish person. When I feel awkard or when I need time to react on something, I start to make jokes, smiling etc. It is something spontanous. I am not sure that I like that characteristics.
Other mask is "I am cool and logical person"...it is when I don't want that someone find out how much I really care for something or someone...

Your masks, ladies and gentlemen, after all it is that time of year:)
 
I think that one of my masks is definitely a logical one that comes with a stoic facial expression. It's so tiring having this mask on around people but I think I might only have a couple of people that I can take it off in front of.
 
Mine is a mask of ignorance. When I want to hide from something/piss someone off/etc I just play stupid. I know a lot about the subject, but I find playing stupid so much easier to do. However, it's so hard to keep a serious face.
 
I think my most common one is the quiet happy helpful one.

I tend to present a picture of confidence and willingness to involve myself in all kinds of things and be the helpful individual is always there for her friends. Deep down though I'm not all that confident about who I am and where I stand with people. I often feel scared and I worry too much about what people think of me, so much so that I will often try to conform to what they would want me to be. I'll accept almost any kind of treatment or nasty comment with good grace, even though I'm crying inside or wanting to scream.

I'm getting a lot better at this, to be fair, but I still can't have it out with anyone, if someone upsets me I tend to spend less time with them and ignore them a lot more, but I try to avoid confrontation at all costs, even if on the inside I'm dying to actually tell someone how I feel about what they've said to me.

I am terrified however of going from having a few friends to having none.
 
Mine is a mask of illusion, to protect my true being underneath. I created it through years of observing human interaction.
Its the closest thing I have to being socially normal. I hate wearing my mask.
 
saru said:
Mine is a mask of ignorance. When I want to hide from something/piss someone off/etc I just play stupid. I know a lot about the subject, but I find playing stupid so much easier to do. However, it's so hard to keep a serious face.
Click to expand...

^^ this is me as well. I am mostly silly anyway, but I like to throw a bit of wide-eyed innocence in with it. On the other hand if I don't want to play around I am very reserved. Probably confuses a few...
 
I wear every mask.
Ugly ones. (cruel, envious)
Glossy, plastic shapes. (materialistic, shallow)
Shimmering velvet veils. (intelligent, knowing)
Blank slates. (naive, impressionable)

Plaster cases, identical faces.
Even those discarded by everybody else.

There is nobody I am uninterested in being.
 
Charkohl said:
I wear every mask.
Ugly ones. (cruel, envious)
Glossy, plastic shapes. (materialistic, shallow)
Shimmering velvet veils. (intelligent, knowing)
Blank slates. (naive, impressionable)

Plaster cases, identical faces.
Even those discarded by everybody else.

There is nobody I am uninterested in being.
Click to expand...

you'd make a good villain for a scooby doo episode.
 
It depends on the day, the environment I'm in, etc.

Some days, I put on the mask of the caring, friendly, talkative person, when in reality I just want to tell people to fuck off or to leave me alone. Sometimes I will just agree with someone on something I would normally disagree with just to avoid an argument. Quite often, I find myself adapting my personality to try to fit better with the company I'm in, especially in situations where I don't know people very well...which I think actually has the opposite effect and makes me appear even more odd. I always tell people to never go by their first impression of me.
Sometimes though, I just stay really quiet and in my own little world.

On a different forum I used to belong to a while back, I played the character of a heartless, uncaring, brutally honest, impudent bitch--funny enough, I used the same handle I use here. It let me get out everything I wanted to say to people in real life, but couldn't get away with. Unfortunately, this started to affect my personality outside the internet and my attitude got me in a bit of trouble (I was written up several times at my former job for my "attitude"). However, the people from this forum who took the time to get to know the real me found out that once I feel comfortable enough with someone to show vulnerability, I actually have a really big heart and am fiercely loyal to those I deem worthy and that I have moments where I feel like I am going to crack and have a breakdown.

Sorry if I got sort of off topic.
 
People see through most of my masks, so I have quit using most of them. I just like the mask of the unknown soldier; soldier used metaphorically.
 
My self and my masks are one and the same. Creating a distinction between the two implies disowning certain aspects of my personality, which I see as dishonesty with oneself.

That said...
 
I don't really know that I could describe it in terms of a mask. More like trying to hide all of my emotional extremes under a short-sheeted bed. It conceals just about everything, but when one extremity is covered, another one is inevitably exposed. I try my best to make sure that only the positive or complacent side is exposed when there are people around.
 
I don't really use 'real' masks either. aI mean I don't declare them masks, but I often just distinguish myself from people when I got enough or someone rejected my awareness of him or her profoundly. Those days I just put a 'mask' of being cold, restrict my conversations to one-liners and chit-chat, and wait for them to realize if I was important to them before and if so approach me again.

I use it against men an women alike. It's much harder to behave like this when a person particularly close to you rejects you, because under that cold 'mask' you constantly want to be with her - as an INFJ not even physically but kind of spiritually. So you just behave the opposite way you would do normally. Extremely draining, but she wouldn't appreciate my real personality otherwise; if I would constantly support her.
 
I often wear a mask of comedy as well, my first reaction to a new problem being to look at it from a lighter perspective, which helps keep me solution oriented.

Around strangers I try to wear a mask of extroversion, trying to be outgoing and affable, because I know that if I don't I won't keep the contacts I love so much, even if group settings aren't really my thing.
 
I personally usually wear a mask of a shy, timid girl. Or when I am hurt I can use a mask really-do-not-care.
 
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I wear the mask of mystery around most people, I enjoy getting people intrigued and try to get them questioning things I say, then I throw the question back into their face.
 
My mask is one of several sides. It almost looks like a real person.
There's the happy-go-lucky side, the romantic who knows just what to say, the counsellor and listener, the polite and friendly and never angry side.

But it can never be real, because there's nothing bad in it, and there is bad in me. I don't show if I hurt, am angry and hateful, jealous or insecure (except to maybe two people - my mum and sister). I just can't do it.

I think masks are there to test the waters with people, but maybe they become a habit and it's only after you've been with someone long enough, you slip up and then you're free. Until then, it's too hard.
 
Some people see me as an easygoing and extroverted SP, and there is a small urge to play that role, but it's hard to pretend something I'm not. Some people (mostly sensors) look up to me as their mentor, but when they find out my weaknesses their castle in the air get's shattered, it's frustrating. Spilling my true self to people feels a bit like feeding scavengers. I've forced myself to get more cynical and to have some objective perspective, to take a step back and deal with the situation from a distance. I'm little jealous to people who can control themselves all the time and don't get lost in their head once in a while. On another hand I love being myself with friends who understand me.

When I deal with people I like to do it in a deep level, once I get to know the person, appearance and mannerism lose their meaning and my attention is directed to personality. Some people like it and some don't.
 
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