Yeah, I KNOW how reasonable this seems. However, the research simply doesn't bear it out. There was a time when everyone thought heavier objects fell faster, too.
Research done by who? you know more then half of marriages end in divorce right?
Yeah, I KNOW how reasonable this seems. However, the research simply doesn't bear it out. There was a time when everyone thought heavier objects fell faster, too.
would rather be committed to life with him before moving in because splitting up our stuff and saying goodbye would be total nightmare. i want some definite certainty within myself that this will last in order to be ok with the possibility of that eventuality. i also want to see him naked many times before making this sort of commitment.
i also want to see him naked many times before making this sort of commitment.
that's alot
I tend to think of marriage as a unique union which isn't the same as living together. I don't think living together has anything to do with the couple's fit or compatiblity. The living situation is often confused with the relationship. I think living together doesn't change the relationship, it just exaggerates the problems you may have if you were to get married later on, or reinforces whether you're someone who is willing to compromise despite everything else. If you develop good communication and interpersonal skills, are honest with each other, and want a real union or relationship with the person, then you're not going to want to lie to them or not allow them to see the best of you. If you really love someone, you will compromise. Yes, we will hide particular aspects of the self we don't want the person to see, and I can see where living together will let you see those aspects of the person. But it's really how honest you feel you can be with the person, that determines how you approach a relationship. If you're truly comfortable and able to be yourself in a relationship, then you won't hide important things about yourself from them. The person may not like or want to accept those aspects but that's separate. If you're looking for a perfect person who will tell you what you want to hear and show you a person who fits your ideal, then of course, you won't get to know the real person until you are with them everyday. Marriage is not a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. It's a long term/lifetime committment which assumes that you will be living with someone everyday, so if you're not preparing yourself or the possibility of seeing the real person everyday, and expect them to be this perfect individual who does everything the right way, the way you want, or exactly as you expect, then you're not being honest with yourself. You're not being honest about it means to be married if you're looking at your partner and the living situation with perfect eyes. Fact is, many people don't prepare themselves mentally and psychologically for marriage. They just go into it, expecting their partners to fulfill their expectations of and when it doesn't work out, they blame the partner and leave. They aren't being honest with themselves about what marriage really means.
So, do you think it's better to live together before marriage, why or why not.
This is not a question about whether couples should or shouldn't get married, but how choosing to live together or not live together before intending to marry affects the relationship and the chance of getting married.
So it is hard to break up with someone you live with, but it is easy to get divorced after you got married?
No, its harder to break up with someone you're living with. They might do something you would normally say something about but if you're living together you might not. A lot of little things build up to one really big thing.
off course but that applies to "living together", married or not. If you say that this is the reason why a lot of marriages end up in a divorce then I agree
but living together before marriage has nothing to do with that. As a matter of fact it rather lower the amount of divorce since people will realize before they get married that they can't live together
Research done by who? you know more then half of marriages end in divorce right?