Is there a level of cleanliness you find upsetting? | INFJ Forum

Is there a level of cleanliness you find upsetting?

Chessie

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Apr 5, 2010
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I know this is kind of a strange question.

What I mean by symmetry is...well, is there a place where you start to get uncomfortable with how clean or how ordered things are in your life or in the lives of people you interact with? I've found cubicle dwelling in larger companies to be entirely intolerable and at various times I've visited friends whose entire homes are utterly without dust, particulate matter, or out of place debris of any kind.

I am not a dirty person by any means (I have a big pet peeve about having unwashed dishes in the kitchen EVER. It can become violent.) but some of my shelves have dust and I know I have a cobweb or two somewhere.

When I come into contact with one of these persons of perfect order, I always feel a bit like I've fallen into the uncanny valley. They become less real to me somehow for having no disorder surrounding them. This situation can be made worse if they are creatures of pure success. I don't feel envy for them. If anything, I feel a bit sad.

There is a level of symmetry which I find entirely emotionally constipating and any one of these things can cause it.

1.Labels on locations for objects that only change position when in use and then return instantly to the same position and never leave it for years on end.
2.Tetris-like ability to line a shelf with bric-a-brac and then keep it clean.
3.A carpet devoid of any sign of stain or tarnishing of age.
4.A perfectly white driveway.
5.A lawn that remains the same length throughout a summer.
6.Knowing children live in someone's house and not being able to tell.
7.A clean lawnmower that stays clean even though the grass is the same length every month after month.
8.When the most dis-ordered thing about a person's home is a garbage can sitting on the corner each week.

Do you find total symmetry and order to be distressing? If so, what about it is so strange and causes this feeling for you?
 
Most of the things on your list don't bother me, personally it's the other end of the spectrum that I can't stand.

But I do have a few quick questions about your list

1.Labels on locations for objects that only change position when in use and then return instantly to the same position and never leave it for years on end.

Is this one about a work space like a tool shed or garage?

3.A carpet devoid of any sign of stain or tarnishing of age.

Your talking about a carpet thats been owned for a while right? Some carpets are more stain resistant then others.

4.A perfectly white driveway.

This one only seems possible if the owner has a garage. The alternative would be excessive cleaning to keep grease and oil up.

5.A lawn that remains the same length throughout a summer.

where do you find this, here in Florida we have to mow the grass twice a week during the sumer and notice growth the next day, during the winter we could mow it once every two weeks.
 
I admit to a certain pleasure in chaos although I don't like dirtiness terribly much. Only a little. I like a room that a person lives in to smell like that person. I don't like to go into someone's bedroom and smell nothing. I just find that strange. Granted, I find scent to be one of the most important senses.
 
I admit to a certain pleasure in chaos although I don't like dirtiness terribly much. Only a little. I like a room that a person lives in to smell like that person. I don't like to go into someone's bedroom and smell nothing. I just find that strange. Granted, I find scent to be one of the most important senses.

everything has a place, all over the place
 
I just assume the person is OCD, and really I don't care. I would never put that much energy into cleaning and organizing, but I don't care if others do.
 
Do you find total symmetry and order to be distressing? If so, what about it is so strange and causes this feeling for you?

Kinda. It feels unnatural. I think chaos is closer to the truth.

edit: although I think segregating one type of material from another to gain a pure product (which is essentially what cleaning is), can be pretty useful. a pure material is a lot more potent. a clean environment is a lot more conducive to productivity, for instance, than is a messy environment - within the mess are many potential distractions.

i would even go so far as to say an "object" in general is a form of purified chaos. (does that make any sense?) i think creation is made proportionally easier given the purity of the starting materials.
 
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I feel much more comfortable in a clean, well organized space than one with dirty and mess and disorganization. Mostly for claustrophobic effects if not bothering my sense of germaphobia as well. The only time it bothers me is if I'm in someone else's clean space and I myself am rather dirty, or at least not spic and span. Like entering someone's clean living room with my shoes on, even if they do it themselves.
A clean space with everything put away feels twice or more light and bright and open than a messy one.
 
I have a friend who's mother used to clean the house, I mean really clean top to bottom, twice a day, once in the morning and once in the late afternoon. One could literally eat from the floors, and that house was devoid of germs, smells (except those of cleaning agents) and anything personal. I always felt troubled when going there. I'm a bit clumsy, and it happens that I accidentally spill something and it that house that kind of "accident" was frowned upon. That is not normal in any way, and it bothered me on so many levels.

I like order and cleanness, but I also like to see the personality of a person living in that space, and you can't see that in a home that is too orderly or too clean, simply because those who tend to clean frequently after some time start throwing things away and keeping some form of minimalism in their spaces, so there is usually very little of personal affects around to be seen. And I always suspect that in a too orderly home there must be some secret closet, or room full of stuff hiding what is the underlying cause of that cleaning obsession.
 
I know this is kind of a strange question.

What I mean by symmetry is...well, is there a place where you start to get uncomfortable with how clean or how ordered things are in your life or in the lives of people you interact with? I've found cubicle dwelling in larger companies to be entirely intolerable and at various times I've visited friends whose entire homes are utterly without dust, particulate matter, or out of place debris of any kind.

I am not a dirty person by any means (I have a big pet peeve about having unwashed dishes in the kitchen EVER. It can become violent.) but some of my shelves have dust and I know I have a cobweb or two somewhere.

When I come into contact with one of these persons of perfect order, I always feel a bit like I've fallen into the uncanny valley. They become less real to me somehow for having no disorder surrounding them. This situation can be made worse if they are creatures of pure success. I don't feel envy for them. If anything, I feel a bit sad.

There is a level of symmetry which I find entirely emotionally constipating and any one of these things can cause it.

1.Labels on locations for objects that only change position when in use and then return instantly to the same position and never leave it for years on end.
2.Tetris-like ability to line a shelf with bric-a-brac and then keep it clean.
3.A carpet devoid of any sign of stain or tarnishing of age.
4.A perfectly white driveway.
5.A lawn that remains the same length throughout a summer.
6.Knowing children live in someone's house and not being able to tell.
7.A clean lawnmower that stays clean even though the grass is the same length every month after month.
8.When the most dis-ordered thing about a person's home is a garbage can sitting on the corner each week.

Do you find total symmetry and order to be distressing? If so, what about it is so strange and causes this feeling for you?

These things - and things like them are not displeasing per se, but point to very controlling (of their physical environment at least) and very S-type people. In a word, SJ's. Being subject to highly controlling Sensors does not seem appealing. So, in that sense I would not like to live in a street of perfectly kept houses - with the exception, if the order was due to one or two especially fussy paid gardeners/housekeepers.
 
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this makes me sad too because it takes time away from the rest of their life. i really like my things to be orderly, to keep all of my papers filed properly, and to be in a room i just cleaned, but i don't want to spend my life cleaning! i can go without it for a while! there are too many other more interesting things to do.
 
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I don't mind order and cleanliness but don't live that way. I can stand disorder. The only thing that ever bothered me was a woman I worked with who made this "magic" solution with all these really harsh cleaners. Sure it would clean anything but damn was it toxic. She used to say something to the effect, "my counters at home are clean, but don't you dare eat food off them". Yea, that was too much for me.
 
I like order and cleanliness, and I usually can't sit in a room that isn't tidied up... but I get uneasy when things seem too sterile. I automatically think about how much time and energy went into such a task and why on earth someone would want to spend that much time perfecting something that is a cursory part of life. After a point, it doesn't have any return on your overall well-being (health-wise or psychology wise) and it makes me think of my ex-boyfriend's sister who goes around detailing the corners of her house with a tooth-brush every week. Or cutting her lettuce into perfect little squares instead of tearing it up for a salad that's going to be tossed and consumed anyways. I am saddened by the idea of anyone being subject to such compulsions, especially if it is something that they cannot help.
 
I can not stand my living space to be exceptionally neat or organized. It drives me nuts. I like a little clutter, and prefer things to look lived in. If the room is sterile, I will be insanely uncomfortable.
 
I like order in my living space, but I like a little clutteredness...It makes it more homey and cozy. As long as I can find everything easily, then it's no issue.

I will not tolerate dirtiness though. eww
 
I like tidy-ness.


DO NOT EVER LEAVE THE CUPBOARD DOORS OPEN.
 
it is common to associate perfect with order and symmetrical. But a human life can never be perfect, we are no gods.
Therefore is someone have a super clean kitchen, I'm sure the living room is no as clean.
If the house is so ordered maybe the career is not.
humans tend to find balance not perfection. and those how see perfect have many falling parts in their lives.
All this to say don't let it bother you, life is short to worry about symmetry and order :D
 
I have also been known to stress clean and then realize I made my own environment unsuitable for me to live in. So, I clean until the place is sterile and then a couple of hours later walk around cluttering it up again.
 
Whenever I go to someones house and it is the EXTREMELY white glove sort of clean I get really uncomfortable because I am too busy worrying about whether or not I will make a mess. And I am clumsy as hell sometimes.

Clutter doesn't bother me unless I am tripping over crap all of the time. But unsanitary filth? Ew. I'm not even a germaphobe, I like to clean with vinegar and baking soda. Very diluted bleach occasionally.

I think one of the grossest things to me is doing the dishes when someone has let them pile up for the entire week. Also, if they filled the sink with water a few days ago to soak them, and you have to stick your hands in nasty rank water with slimy food chunks. I shudder just thinking about it.
 
I get made fun of all the time because my cube at the office appears totally neat, actually devoid of anything. I constantly try to reassure people (without success) that my mess is all in files on CDs.

My home is much the same...it is well picked up, but not necessarily spotless. However, the reason I put things back where they belong, have clean counters, and dishes are washed and put up though has less to do with order/control and more to do with the fact that I am lazy (don't want to work on dried up food), forgetful (can't remember where I last put things and so I have moreorless assigned places for things), and creative (cleanliness means a blank canvas for starting work on my latest mad endeavor). It's all smoke and mirrors....any orderliness I exhibit is a means to another unseen end, not an end in itself.

As for the yummy subject of symmetry and asymmetry, I believe both have value, although I confess that I (and my mind) lean strongly towards the asymmetrical. I think this sums up life/reality more accurately.
 
well i dont know the name of them but i don't like those housing developments where everyones yard has to be the same shade of green, everyone has one lamp post, and then theres this committee who goes around checking to make sure everyone looks exactly the same. im pretty sure one of these recently told a veteran he couldn't put up a flag pole bc it was too big, i mean really? other than that i don't really care about cleanliness, though i usually am more careful in a super tidy house.
 
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