Do you think INFJs are clingy? | INFJ Forum

Do you think INFJs are clingy?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by earthtocarrie, Apr 11, 2009.

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  1. earthtocarrie

    earthtocarrie Regular Poster

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    I have quite a few close INFJ friends, and I find that they have this tendency to be overly clingy towards people their afraid to lose.



    Just wondering if my observation is accurate. What do you guys think?
     
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  2. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    You mean you have an INFJ sister :D
     
  3. OP
    earthtocarrie

    earthtocarrie Regular Poster

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    Yes but I have my suspicions that meiro is an ISFX rather then an INFJ
     
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  4. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    noo, she's definitely N, she's too awesome.
     
  5. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    i don't know any other INFJs, but as for myself i actually have a tendency to be overly detached yet loyal at heart
     
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  6. poetrygirl

    poetrygirl Community Member

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    This is partly true for me. I can go anywhere between being too clingy to detached depending on how I feel.
     
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  7. Le Fant

    Le Fant Newbie

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    I've been told I'm clingy . . .

    and for some reason it really offends me and then I go out of my way to argue that I'm not.


    I'm not sure why, because it isn't necessarily a bad thing . . . is it?:m075:
     
  8. corvidae

    corvidae ohai internets
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    I'm clingy on the inside, cold on the outside.
     
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  9. Zero Angel

    Zero Angel Permanent Fixture

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    Yeah its one of the things I concern myself with. I try my hardest not to be clingy however I've noticed that I do have this potential.
     
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  10. CoffeeShopDiva

    CoffeeShopDiva Community Member

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    Indeed.
     
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  11. Bored Now

    On Holiday

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    True of me too. Not cold on the outside so much as not SERIOUS on the outside. It's more like Cyrano De Bergerac. I'll be playful and light and made of win, but on the inside I'm utterly consumed with longing. I'd write you sonnets and make my heart a beautiful paradise to delight your every whim... And I would never tell you until it was all over with...

    So I *could* be clingy... but I'm too afraid to be... I guess.
     
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  12. slant

    slant amour-propre
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    I suppose at the 'getting to know you' phase of a friendship I can be fasinated and clingy but after I understand that person interest pretty much fizzles out.
     
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  13. Dutch Cake

    Dutch Cake Community Member

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    Depending on the situation I can be very clingy. I have a hard time during break ups. I am learning quickly though. In friendships I learned at an early age not to follow the same really interesting person around with out saying anything because they will make fun of you.
     
  14. EloquentBohemian

    EloquentBohemian Community Member

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    The metaphor for me would be an egg: hard, smooth and impenetratable on the outside, and liquid, gooey and sticky (clingy) on the inside.
    I am a devout and incurable Romantic Idealist.

    As John Keats wrote: "Love is my religion - I could die for it."
     
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  15. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    SAME. i'm most attached to a particular someone when i'm alone or when they are not present. i tend not to express the depth of emotion i experience when they are actually around and instead reveal it in small doses. i do this in part because it usually takes awhile for me to be definite enough that the person is really who i intuit them to be as i've had past experiences where my intuition led me to empower my own ego rather than build a fulfilling true relationship. as with family, it's almost impossible for me to express any bold emotion at all.
     
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  16. Ophelia

    Ophelia Community Member

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    I'm not overly clingy. I am loving, loyal and require a certain amount of attention, which often times people don't comply with.
     
  17. Faye

    Faye ^_^
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    I think I'm clingy. I don't know about anyone else.
     
  18. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    Yup, I am the same way for the post part. I have found that if I feel a strong drawing towards someone in particular, then I will become sort of obsessed with them, and could become clingly. I hate that in myself though, so if I see it I try to restrict it.
     
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  19. gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    I am a desperate, terribly clingy person that fears being left more than almost anything.

    But, I'm good at hiding that. I've learned how to make that hard to see, and fortunately it hasn't be noticed quite yet.
     
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  20. Zero Angel

    Zero Angel Permanent Fixture

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    When I was in grade 6, I had this friend who was an ENTP -- we got along awesomely but I can recall feeling pangs of jealousy if he didnt want to spend time with me and decided to spend time with other friends instead. Of course among all his friends I was still his best one because we were the only ones who did lots of N stuff together.

    I also recall this one time 2 years ago I became interested in an INFx woman, she was generally a poor-me type and I came to visit her one day and we walked to the park and sat on the swingsets and talked about various things, I was in good spirits at the time and wanted to listen to her and help her because she was interesting -- we went back to her place and talked about various things including god and came to somewhat a rather heated disagreement although I still tried to learn her perspective and still liked her. I tried to get her to go on a date with me and she stated she was on her way soon but she ended up standing me up and when I called she said something like she was too shy to come, I was really disappointed to the point of being hurt. I tried to arrange meetups with her twice and she seemed to have some kind of excuse and because I felt like something was wrong with me when she would not come with me I eventually dropped her cold. I asked her why she did not want to ever come to any event I set up, and she could be as brutally honest as possible and she said she didnt know -- so with grim finality I told her that it was fine, I was never going to contact her again -- she called once for me months later but i completely cut her out of my life and would not return her call. This is how I know I might be clingy when the situation comes up, because I attach too much emotional value to the person who I'm interested in. I generally avoid any situation which may become a romantic one although part of me wants it, because I don't want to be 1) Played for a chump, or 2) Rejected at some point -- because rejection hurts when you pin your hopes on your plans working out.
     
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    #20 Zero Angel, Apr 12, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2009
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