Your Inner Gay Having A Freakout!

[Chessie]

Okay, I have recently seen what cannot be unseen. I need help to purge my mind of it.

Everyone has an inner gay. It's a tiny, flamboyantly homosexual man who sits in Gucci loafers and a perfectly tailored suit in the back of your head and glares at someone every time they massively violate the rules of fashion.

He has nothing to do with your sexual orientation and yet whenever he shrieks at you, you feel just a little bit queer for noticing.

Today my inner gay has flipped his shit entirely. I was driving home from a movie with my room-mate and she pointed out a woman strolling along the side of the road in a BRIGHT yellow tube-shirt and a pair of equally yellow coochie cutters.

She was approximately eight months pregnant and talking into what I am fairly sure was a faux diamond encrusted I-Phone. Her hair-weave was black and the same color as her top, drawn up at the back of her head and looking vaguely like a skunk had lost it's tail for this horrifying fashion failure.

Her flip-flops were bright green. The same color green as a transformer box and covered in a bright green tropical flower tucked between her big toes.

We had to sit there and shudder for several minutes.

What is your inner gay freak-out?

 

[Diana]

My inner gay hates skinny jeans. Even if they are supposed to be in fashion. The truth is NO ONE looks good in skinny jeans. I don't care how skinny you are.

 

[Peaceful_Cynic]

I'm going to go with skinny jeans as well. Also, short shorts and Uggs, manpris (men in Capri pants) or long shorts with long sweat socks.

 

[Feelings]

Oh. And here I thought it would be the perfect place to talk about the feelings that I had when I saw this well built dude in the change room the other day... -disappointed-

 

[Feelings]

I'm going to go with skinny jeans as well. Also, short shorts and Uggs, manpris (men in Capri pants) or long shorts with long sweat socks.

I like seeing females in anything tight, or short shorts. And I think manpris are charming.

But yeah long shorts are gay. And the only time any man should be wearing long socks is if he's playing soccer. Female long socks can be nice.

 

[youhemmein]

I see this kind of stuff everyday. Pregnant women with midriffs, girls with shorts so short you can see their buttcheeks and pocket change, BIG FAT MEN in skinny jeans. (I like big men, but NOT this way) Justin Bieber hair. On anyone.

 

[Billy]

I like to think I have a pretty good eye for design and fashion, mostly because I dated a girl who studied design and fashion for 8 years... so my inner design/fashion person isn't actually gay (a ridiculous stereotype) its actually a 5 foot tall Chinese girl.

 

[acd]

I don't have one.

 

[Peppermint]

What about skinny jeans?

 

[splott]

Very large/old people, very small/young clothes....there was a lady at the pool on sunday, she had to be nearly 70 and was wearing a bikini...the straps of which she untied from her neck and wrapped around her scrawny wrinkled torso..*shudder*
I'm a very young-looking 37, average weight, and I wouldn't wear a bikini, and if (heaven forbid) I did, I sure as hell wouldn't untie the straps and do anything weird with it!

 

[Satya]

I beat my inner gay to death and then invited Westboro Baptist Church to the funeral.

I have absolutely no affinity for fashion.

 

[Blind Bandit]

People who wear socks with sandals. I'm not really big on fashion. But for god sakes if you need socks wear shoes not sandals.

Also Most women even bigger ladies look good in skinny jeans. But super short shorts should only be worn at home for fun or for you SO. Not in public.

 

[DrShephard]

I made a quick list:

Women:
Skirts with leggings
Pixie haircuts (Personal preference, I've always loved long hair)
Uggs while not wearing a faux-fur trimmed jacket (Either full eskimo look or nothing, please)
Lip implants

Men:
Sandals
Ankle socks
Pants that would show that you're wearing ankle socks
Pink Shirts
Way too baggy clothing (You look like you're wearing your fat brother's hand me downs)
Way too skinny clothing

All:
Gaudy clothing (The blacks are more guilty of this than other races (no racist))
Putting your god damn feet out the god damn window or on the god damn dash of your god damn car.
Gaged Ears
Dreadlocks
Stock Tattoos

 

[DrShephard]

oh, and I HATE peep-toe shoes. GOD they are stupid and look dumb.

 

[christmas]

nothing phases me anymore

except:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3I64m0x6wI"]YouTube - ‪Fannypack's "Camel Toe"‬‏[/ame]

 

[894tt3h9]

Crocs. You know the "shoes" I am talking about.

 

[AUM]

People who wear socks with sandals. I'm not really big on fashion. But for god sakes if you need socks wear shoes not sandals.

But...but...but if you don't wear socks, your feet begin sweating and smelling like cheese, and I'm too lazy to put shoes on.

 

[DevilDoll]

My inner gay hates skinny jeans. Even if they are supposed to be in fashion. The truth is NO ONE looks good in skinny jeans. I don't care how skinny you are.

I look good in skinny jeans. But I agree that they are not made for every body type. They work for me by elongating my legs, giving me the appearance of more height.

 

[DrShephard]

Crocs. You know the "shoes" I am talking about.

[MENTION=1834]sandra_b[/MENTION]

I went to the goth club I sometimes visit one night, and a friend of a friend came wearing a stained T-shirt, baggy grey sweatpants and used-to-be-bright-orange-but-then-he-wore-them-a-lot-so-now-they're-a-darker-dirty-orange crocs. My friend asked why he was wearing those awful shoes, and he said "Cause they're comfortable."

Eugh!

And now crocs are being made into bastardizations of other types of shoes - Like this abomination.

 

[Sloe Djinn]

And now crocs are being made into bastardizations of other types of shoes - Like this abomination.

Finally, I can transition seamlessly from cross-training to gardening!