the more you know...
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Could go both ways.
You could find out things that further impressive you or traits you dislike or even go against some of your moral codes.
Are you asking for the perspective of a cynic or an optimist?
For me, it always depends on the person... and I'll let you guess as to which of those I am.
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My mind likes them less. But my heart understand them more. Most are not worth it.
It goes both ways for me, I can specifically think of someone in my life that I have come to like more as I get to know them better, but I can think of a couple of people in my life that I like less as I get to know them better. While writing this im thinking that maybe it happens more often for me that the more I know the less I like, even though that isn't always the rule.
It depends on what I learn about them, where my focus is, and ultimately depends on my tolerance and acceptance of their right to be themselves. I prefer people that I can relate to on a deep level. This is an ideal, and holding it limits my acceptance of certain traits in people, so that the less they look like my ideal, the less I like them. I realise this is my own problem.
It depends.
The more I've gotten to know two of my friends, I like them more because I understand their motivations better and we have more in common. We also 'get' each other better, which is nice
(although no one knows me well enough to feel okay when I get angry ^^" unfortunately).
However, I recently got to know more about another friend and I'm not really sure how to act around them because I disagree with everything they've stated that they believe in. Of course, I look on the positive side, that we have similar interests but... he's just really, really close-minded
The more I've gotten to know two of my friends, I like them more because I understand their motivations better and we have more in common. We also 'get' each other better, which is nice
(although no one knows me well enough to feel okay when I get angry ^^" unfortunately).However, I recently got to know more about another friend and I'm not really sure how to act around them because I disagree with everything they've stated that they believe in. Of course, I look on the positive side, that we have similar interests but... he's just really, really close-minded
Sometimes I like a person less after a while. Although I think it is because I romanticize them so much in my fantasy that they prove be something other than what I painted them to be. However I may come to like them more afterwards, so even though they are different from the expected, they may be even better!!
I've done this once on a person..and I'm worried if my *ideas* don't end up the truth in the end...Sometimes I like a person less after a while. Although I think it is because I romanticize them so much in my fantasy that they prove be something other than what I painted them to be. However I may come to like them more afterwards, so even though they are different from the expected, they may be even better!!
I guess there is always a 50/50 risk when you meet someone
They could be great, they could be something else...
Sometimes I like a person less after a while. Although I think it is because I romanticize them so much in my fantasy that they prove be something other than what I painted them to be. However I may come to like them more afterwards, so even though they are different from the expected, they may be even better!!
I do this as well. I think they'd need to have something which stands out to develop a sustained interest.
No, not really. I usually don't learn a whole lot about most people. Many are not much more than what you can gather from them in the first time hanging out, which seems kind of pretentious on my side, but that's my experience.
If I do uncover sides of a person that I had not found straight-off-the-bat, it often makes them more interesting, but I wouldn't say I like them more or less as a person.
I make it a point to understand people, not idealize them.
If I do uncover sides of a person that I had not found straight-off-the-bat, it often makes them more interesting, but I wouldn't say I like them more or less as a person.
I make it a point to understand people, not idealize them.
I think for me it can happen either way, but more so that I like people less as I get to know some one. We are very idealized in our worldview and get disappointed by people and society a lot. I personally always try to start with the idea that someone is good, and try to disect the reasons for any negative acts I see. If I can empathize with the reason, I'm more likely to still think positively of them.
The part that drives me crazy though is that my Ni ususally tells me very early on whether I will like this person, whether they are "good". I used to feel like this was pre-judging, and that I wasn't giving them a chance. Now I'm not so sure. I listen to the inner voice, but I still try to give people a chance to prove me wrong (or right).
And I have been so pleased that I have liked basically eveyone on this forum more as I have gotten to know them! Yes, it's not the real world, but I think I would feel the same way in person.
The part that drives me crazy though is that my Ni ususally tells me very early on whether I will like this person, whether they are "good". I used to feel like this was pre-judging, and that I wasn't giving them a chance. Now I'm not so sure. I listen to the inner voice, but I still try to give people a chance to prove me wrong (or right).
And I have been so pleased that I have liked basically eveyone on this forum more as I have gotten to know them! Yes, it's not the real world, but I think I would feel the same way in person.
The more I know about a person, the more I understand the cause and effects in their life that produced the result of who they are. When I can see that, it reminds me how much I might be like them had I been exposed to their same influences. In this way i feel more of a connection which can be associated with a feeling of liking them. If I admire the person it gives me hope, and if I fear the person it gives me patience.
At this point I don't know if there are always explanations for how a person is. I don't know how much individual choice is present and how much is the result of everything that shaped the person. There are a few cruel people I know whose lives don't quite add up. Even though they were shaped by cruelty and fear, they seem to have produced more in their actions. The more I know of these people the more the balance is tipped in the direction of them being an agent of destruction in a ways that exceeds what was given them. I don't know what to do with this knowledge in my mind. I hope there is a better explanation.
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