the more you know... | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

the more you know...

I think for me it can happen either way, but more so that I like people less as I get to know some one. We are very idealized in our worldview and get disappointed by people and society a lot. I personally always try to start with the idea that someone is good, and try to disect the reasons for any negative acts I see. If I can empathize with the reason, I'm more likely to still think positively of them.

The part that drives me crazy though is that my Ni ususally tells me very early on whether I will like this person, whether they are "good". I used to feel like this was pre-judging, and that I wasn't giving them a chance. Now I'm not so sure. I listen to the inner voice, but I still try to give people a chance to prove me wrong (or right).

And I have been so pleased that I have liked basically eveyone on this forum more as I have gotten to know them! Yes, it's not the real world, but I think I would feel the same way in person.

Good post.
 
Sorry, I know this question was only asked of infj's, but this topic rings close to me. I'll probably mimic what's already been said.

if the core qualities that i desire are there in a person, the more i get to know them, most likely the more i'll like them, and forgive their minor flaws.

if to start out with a person is lacking in the major qualities that i desire, then i will most likely dislike them more, and each emerging flaw will seem magnified to me.
 
As a rule of thumb, no. Mostly because if I intrinsicly like or dislike someone when I first meet them, that idea holds on throught the entire time that I know them usually. So if I intriniscly like someone to begin with, if I see flaws show up in them, I will in some way forgive these flaws within them. If I dislike someone, I will magnify the flaws in some way. It is rare that the line crosses into good or bad to what I initally thought it was.