Straight INFJ Males | Page 11 | INFJ Forum

Straight INFJ Males

As perhaps made apparent by my other posts, I too am a straight INFJ male. I don't like the characteristics of the archetypal male and have found many of the men in my age range to be animalistic, thoughtless, and simple. I don't like sports, I'm not competitive, I laugh when men describe themselves as 'alpha males.' It amuses me that some males strongly indentify with a biological role common to dominant male wolves and apes. In my last relationship, my girlfriend of the time would tell me that I'm 'not like a man'. I like being given flowers on romantic occasions, have a plant collection and like making floral arrangements. I guess it's very INFJ to see sex as an intimate and emotional thing and certainly that puts me apart the other men I meet. Overall, while somewhat sexually frustrated, I'm not conflicted or confused and enjoy being the way I am.
 
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As perhaps made apparent by my other posts, I too am a straight INFJ male. I don't like the characteristics of the archetypal male and have found many of the men in my age range to be animalistic, thoughtless, and simple. I don't like sports, I'm not competitive, I laugh when men describe themselves as 'alpha males.' It amuses me that some males strongly indentify with a biological role common to dominant male wolves and apes. In my last relationship, my girlfriend of the time would tell me that I'm 'not like a man'. I like being given flowers on romantic occasions, have a plant collection and like making floral arrangements. I guess it's very INFJ to see sex as an intimate and emotional thing and certainly that puts me apart the other men I meet. Overall, while somewhat sexually frustrated, I'm not conflicted or confused and enjoy being the way I am.

~Has your back~ lol...Is that a pack mentality I am participating in? I can relate completely... almost word for word. Almost.
 
Excellent, it's good to know we aren't alone :)
I actually have no male friends to speak of at the moment....the last good one that I had for years and years tried to get in my former wife's pants....so that ended that....I think with that macho mentality comes this "thinking with penis" stereotype that exists.
 
Except there is more truth in it than stereotype.....
 
I draw flowers all the time <3
 
This last post got me thinking, I've got more close male friends then I do female friends, and they mostly tend to be NT's or ST's. Along side of that they all have the tendency to be more then "what you see is what you get", often promoting bitter or negative personal views about themselves while living in a slightly different manner from what they espouse. That and confidence, confidence seems to be one of the most common traits among my friends.
 
This last post got me thinking, I've got more close male friends then I do female friends, and they mostly tend to be NT's or ST's. Along side of that they all have the tendency to be more then "what you see is what you get", often promoting bitter or negative personal views about themselves while living in a slightly different manner from what they espouse. That and confidence, confidence seems to be one of the most common traits among my friends.

I am fairly confident in myself (although I despise people who are TOO confident)...I just don't think I have the energy it actually takes at the moment to make and keep any good friends... I know I could if I so desired....but it just isn't a priority at the moment....I don't feel I'm lacking anything by not having them.
 
I am fairly confident in myself (although I despise people who are TOO confident)...I just don't think I have the energy it actually takes at the moment to make and keep any good friends... I know I could if I so desired....but it just isn't a priority at the moment....I don't feel I'm lacking anything by not having them.

It's funny how friendships start, all of mine have been from mutual enjoyment of a particular interest. In high-school it was ROTC and Magic the Gathering which introduced me to one of my best friends, In college it was board games, which branched into strategy games in general and slowly turned into more then a bunch of guys playing with toys to bunch of guys who hung out on a regular basis sharing life experiences and other bs.

Edit:

It also helps when you can travel through space and time taking them to places beyond there wildest imaginations.
 
It's funny how friendships start, all of mine have been from mutual enjoyment of a particular interest. In high-school it was ROTC and Magic the Gathering which introduced me to one of my best friends, In college it was board games, which branched into strategy games in general and slowly turned into more then a bunch of guys playing with toys to bunch of guys who hung out on a regular basis sharing life experiences and other bs.

Edit:

It also helps when you can travel through space and time taking them to places beyond there wildest imaginations.
Yes...I actually used to have quite a large group of people I would have considered my friends....2-3 close ones...I just don't see the advantage anymore...maybe I just haven't met the right people...such as the people on this forum....anyway, I feel comfortable being solitary for the time being.
 
Yes...I actually used to have quite a large group of people I would have considered my friends....2-3 close ones...I just don't see the advantage anymore...maybe I just haven't met the right people...such as the people on this forum....anyway, I feel comfortable being solitary for the time being.

Don't trust the people on this forum, they're weird and I have it from the highest order that someone on here is a ISTJ.
 
Don't trust the people on this forum, they're weird and I have it from the highest order that someone on here is a ISTJ.
I will keep an eye out....lol.
 
How about a straight-gay INFJ male? I mean, for instance:

My favorite sports consist of golf, billiards/pool and bowling
My hobbies are playing an instrument, computers and video games
I like gardening
I don't specifically train in anything - weights, martial arts or otherwise
I don't really drink and when I do it's usually a glass of wine
I talk with animals
I listen to classical music
I play classical guitar
I hate most sports like Football (US version) and Baseball
I'm a tree-hugger
I grow tired of interacting with people displaying the typical male stereotypes - they bore me
I've had several good female friends
My bookshelf consists of classic literature

If I weren't married and definitely interested in the opposite, sex, people would end up thinking I'm gay. Because I didn't get drunk in the bars watching football in college and then always try to hit on anything with two legs they assumed even more.
 
im straight and never been much of sports fan and the whole thing with people hating on gays or any type of people color what ever this is 2012 people get off your high horse your not better then any one just be real to yourself dont know what else to say been up for 24 hours now
 
Your post lines up with me so much, I decided to just red the areas that don't, and blue the areas that are my additions.

My favorite sports consist of frisbee golf, billiards/pool and bowling (though I don't mind playing it at all) fencing and archery. I also love to play the board game Go.
My hobbies are playing an instrument (I do visual arts), computers and video games
I like gardening
I don't specifically train in anything - weights, martial arts or otherwise (I prefer the passive arts like Tai Chi and Aikido, but it was and still is difficult for me to make classes or gym workouts with any regularity... but I was brought up with martial arts. My dad was an instructor.)
I don't really drink and when I do it's usually a glass of wine (or a glass of port)
I talk with animals
I listen to classical music (and ambient)
I play classical guitar (again I do visual art, illustration, photography, etc.)
I hate most sports like Football (US version) and Baseball
I'm a tree-hugger (I love nature and animals, but I'm not especially 'green'. My approach is more like the native Americans I grew up with).
I grow tired of interacting with people displaying the typical male stereotypes - they bore me
I've had several (mostly) good female friends
My bookshelf consists of classic literature (as well as science fiction, fantasy, and roleplaying games)

If I weren't married and definitely interested in the opposite, sex, people would end up thinking I'm gay. Because I didn't get drunk in the bars watching football in college and then always try to hit on anything with two legs they assumed even more.
 
INFJ type here as well. I follow this type as closely as can be, much to the occasional frustration (and joy) of my wife.
 
Heh-- usually straight people are a majority and don't feel the need to form groups, so I guess in a way it's nice that you've all got this personality test to help to make you into a minority so you can finally know what it's like to be in a group. I guess it's nice to have a community!

That said, the behaviors you're listing off here are more like stereotypes than real people… it seems like you're convinced that being gay is also being really feminine and generally annoying. Yeah, those guys are around and everyone likes to make a big deal out of them, but they're not what a lot of gay guys want to identify with.
 
As perhaps made apparent by my other posts, I too am a straight INFJ male. I don't like the characteristics of the archetypal male and have found many of the men in my age range to be animalistic, thoughtless, and simple. I don't like sports, I'm not competitive, I laugh when men describe themselves as 'alpha males.' It amuses me that some males strongly indentify with a biological role common to dominant male wolves and apes. In my last relationship, my girlfriend of the time would tell me that I'm 'not like a man'. I like being given flowers on romantic occasions, have a plant collection and like making floral arrangements. I guess it's very INFJ to see sex as an intimate and emotional thing and certainly that puts me apart the other men I meet. Overall, while somewhat sexually frustrated, I'm not conflicted or confused and enjoy being the way I am.

I can relate to quite a bit of what you posted.
I believe I said in an earlier post on this thread that I don't care about sports, and that at times I have to defend my masculinity with other men when they find this out.
"You don't watch football?!"
I sometimes have fun with it. "Oh, was there a game yesterday?" in response to being asked if I watched the Super Bowl. he he.

I find the whole male, wolves, chest thumping, Neanderthal mentality amusing myself. I think men that present themselves that way are dumbing themselves down. "I'm just a big dumb oaf" is what it tells the world.
I also think it is a cover for their insecurities.

God, I hate the freakin' term "Man cave"!
I love being out in my garage working on my car, or welding something up. Or fixing something that is broken.
Grease, gears and gasoline!
I love the smell of exhaust that comes from burning premium fuel in a big block V8.
These are things I enjoy that are manly.

But, at the same time can enjoy helping the Wife care for her gardens or whatever interests she may have.
I happen to have a couple of Orchids I tend to in the house. They aren't doing so well right now, but I try.
I easily make friends with Women. They seem to easily accept and trust me. My Wife says it's because my respect for Women shines through, and they can sense it.