So, when did you realize there was something different about you? | INFJ Forum

So, when did you realize there was something different about you?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Jun 12, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    Many have mentioned in forum posts or blogs about feeling different, out of place, or out of step with people around them, so my question is, when did you realize there was something seemingly different about you? Was this something you've always felt or was there a particular moment which stands out as the moment you began to feel that you were different whether because you were treated differently or because you didn't seem to click with some or everyone around you?


     
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  2. Skathac

    Skathac <font color=#27A601>Community Member</font>

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    Third grade. Other children would get in trouble for acting up in class, I got in trouble for reading. Things just kinda grew from there I suppose.
     
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  3. Ergo Christobal

    Ergo Christobal Talking Lightbulb
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    I guess I always knew I was a little different, but I really came to terms with it in high school. I noticed that the majority of people my age were quite stupid, and dull. I didn't understand why people did things, but I knew somewhere there were other people like me.

    I've always thought that everybody is different, and nobody has a normal they feel a part of. After throwing out the idea of normal, I considered it normal to be different. Then, I didn't really think about it.

    I still think that everyone is different, I try to think about people complexly instead of my lame generalizations in high school. INFJs are seen as more different because we're hard to understand while at the same time we easily understand others so much.
     
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  4. Flavus Aquila

    Flavus Aquila Finding My Place in the Sun
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    First day of pre-school. My mother always remembers my disbelief - and incredible distaste - at seeing other children either speaking with food in their mouths, or eating with their mouths open. I think she remembers this with embarrasment because I wouldn't stop calling out to her that the other kids were eating with their mouths open.

    Funny thing is, that this is the only memory I have of pre-school: how alien the other kids seemed.
     
    #4 Flavus Aquila, Jun 12, 2010
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2010
  5. Puck

    Puck Perilous Pixie
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    Aged four, in church, wondering why on earth the adults were taking this stuff seriously.
     
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  6. jessvj

    jessvj Newbie

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    Since birth, I was born in a small town and by kindergarten I have always felt different, for years I guess I just focused on different things, I make friend easy, they just seem to gravitate towards me, but I never say anything in class they just talk to me, I just assume that people think I'm complex, it is weird, I've only recently found out that I'm an INFJ and being in a small town, I'm kinda rare, lol.
     
    #6 jessvj, Jun 12, 2010
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2010
  7. laurie

    laurie Snowblind in Dreamland

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    Since I was very young and realised I could tell why people were acting a certain way. I also wasn't really interested in most things kids my age liked (I just wanted to sit somewhere and read, or watch what was going on).
    Good example was when everyone was running about in a Street Party and I just took a packet of crisps and watched the band play (I was about 3 or 4).
     
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  8. invisible

    On Holiday

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    i remember feeling excited when i was accepted into a selective secondary school over some vague notion that i'd meet people more "like me" there, and devastated to find that things were exactly the same. i was 12 then. i'm not sure that before that age i had a very articulated sense of difference - i thought i was just a lot better at reading.

    testing infj last year was kind of an emotional moment for me. i'm not too sure about it now though. it resonates with who i am but on the other hand i'm not sure that i feel as vastly different from others as i did at that point, or in my later years of school. maybe just more reconciled to myself now.
     
  9. enfp can be shy

    enfp can be shy people vs the bad people?
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    There's nothing different about me, but I'm telling you, all those people walking around everywhere I go, most of them are so different..
     
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  10. shannishannon

    shannishannon Saponifier
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    I realized very early on too, but more on a "I always knew" (early Ni?) Sadly, I spent my childhood, teen and early adult years trying to fit in, not realizing I was, actually normal. I noticed things people my own age and beyond never noticed. Inconsistencies were noted, sometimes with disbelief or outrage. And then that blasted empathy thing got me into trouble a lot because with certain people you weren't supposed to notice that either.
     
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  11. Grey Wolf

    Grey Wolf Airborne all the way!

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    when I was five haha
    I always was wondering new stuff and saw things people didnt. my primary school days forged my E shield and my secondary school reinforced it. I had and have friends, mostly up to a certain extent. there were a few that I could really connect with but time tore our group apart so hey, thats life.

    oh well, oh yeah. i still remember it was one friend that made me start to reflect on what I do. which in a way, made me become more I than E. that was way back when i was 10.
     
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  12. Norwich

    Norwich insistent
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    When I was in kindergarten and the teacher kept lambasting me for daydreaming. Still can't figure out what was so interesting about what everyone else was doing. Also, still getting accused of thinking about things to much.
     
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  13. under skies

    under skies Community Member

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    I think I have the opposite problem. I had a really hard time believing other people were real when I was a kid.

    I'm very ashamed of it now, of course, but, yeah, I was sort of weirdly solipsist as a child. When I got a bit older, my view flipped. I don't remember exactly when that was.

    I don't feel particularly "different" now. But I'm also not an INFJ, so my perspective may not be applicable.
     
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  14. DoveAlexa

    DoveAlexa Chaz's Lovey Bunny
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    Whoa! Me too! Since I could never connect with people the way they magically seemed to connect with each other, I wondered if they were even real, or just pre-made people living pre-written lives. Or even more often, if these people all knew something I didn't. Like they all knew exactly what to do in life and thats why they all hung out with each other, minus me of course.
    I knew I was different at maybe 3, I already saw everyone else as "knowing what to do" and I was always, always lost.
     
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  15. Billy

    Billy Contents Under Pressure
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    Kindergarten. I learned what my inside voices were all about because there were so many new unknown faces and I was a very very quiet boy. Watching everything intently and trying to understand it. Oddly enough it was mostly cold and almost emotionless back then I can remember I didn't start getting really emotional until puberty. Then it was a tortured cold gaze lol.
     
  16. MelodyS90

    MelodyS90 Newbie

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    First day of preschool. I was interesting in art. Art for hours and hours, everyday. I walk in and learn that all the other kids were immature and uninterested. The teacher bothered me because I didn't view myself as like the other kids, but I was treated the same. The art projects in that class were stupid and for people who had no talent. I drew my first picture at 24 months (2 years old) and I can still tell exactly what it is. I still draw birds in the distance the same way I did then (and famous artists do it that way too, fyi). I hated P.E. the first day, while the other kids liked it. I already knew how to read. I almost didn't make it into the class because I was a month or two younger than their age requirement.
    This isn't to say I didn't make a couple friends. It's just that I knew I was different.
     
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    #16 MelodyS90, Jun 12, 2010
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2010
  17. gator

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    This was it for me, only it was kindergarten. On the first day all the kids were crying and just said bye to my mom and went to play with the lego. I didn't understand why other kids were so upset. Their parents were going to pick them up afterward, right?

    The kids did things that I thought were weird and distasteful, such as sucking the ink out of felt markers and then showing their multicoloured tongues to everyone else. I also didn't want to play dolls or house with the other girls because I just didn't understand the appeal.
     
  18. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    I probably would not really have felt different from other people had my family not thought to tell me consistently from an early age that I was unusual and joke about aliens returning for me someday! (But I guess it was teasing in love because I scolded my parents for making prejudiced comments and I cried when I saw roadkill and picked up litter when I was a kid.)



    But, the older I get and the more people I come in contact with from work school or just everyday life, the less different from other people I feel.
     
    #18 acd, Jun 12, 2010
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2010
  19. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    hmm id like to answer this but i'm not sure what to say. what is different? how would you define different? is the perception of feeling different separate from the reality of BEING different? if one feels different but actually is like everyone else, are they in fact, different? who's perspective would count more here, the subjective or the objective?
    (you don't have to answer those! just thinking out loud)

    in terms of merely feeling different, i'll say no, i don't feel different. i feel just like everyone else. objectively i probably am different, based on my experiences and the way I react to things.
     
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    #19 TinyBubbles, Jun 12, 2010
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  20. Ria

    Ria Snow White over the ocean

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    I don't remember my exact age, but I recall feeling very different from everyone else around me too.

    I recall in the hallways and in classes, my sensitivity to noise, crowded halls and the general busy environment around me had me struggling to not fall to my knees and be stepped on. I just couldn't stand it, and felt always the need to escape in a book or a quiet corner outside somewhere. Those noisy hallways full of people who knew eachother etc, was far too overwealming for me. I remember at times feeling like I was going to scream and have a seizure just from sheer stimulation overkill!

    I actually sometimes felt intimidated by everyone because no one else around me, seemed to be affected the same way I was. I remember this really used to get me down. Detaching was relieving, yet lonely somehow but provided me with the space to study and watch others around me and I found I could understand them despite not being able to be like them, because I felt sure it was me that had something wrong with them, not others.
     
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