Pros and cons of being single | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Pros and cons of being single

Kinda agree that there are some good pros to being single, such as a sense of independence and confidence outside of your relationship with someone.
 
Pros: no one to nag you, no one to bitch at you for doing stuff they don't like, and no one to worry about hurting.

Cons: all of those things and the cuddling.

You never realize how much you miss bitching till nobody's bitching at you. :(
 
Was in relationship over 7y and got out as hurted side, now I'm single for about a month and all I see are cons of being single.
 
pro: don't have to answer to anybody, kinda like being self-employed
i really enjoy the freedoms

con: it does get lonely, very lonely at times

4yrs and counting, but i ain't stressin'
cause i'm actually content being single,
not fulfilled but i'm content where i'm at
 
unpersons said:
Pros: no one to nag you, no one to bitch at you for doing stuff they don't like, and no one to worry about hurting.

Cons: all of those things and the cuddling.

You never realize how much you miss bitching till nobody's bitching at you. :(
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This is so true. I was thinking something sort of similar to this actually as I was pondering over this. The pros to being single essentially boils down to the freedom, but too much freedom can sometimes cause a person to become lazy about their self development. Or they could become too confident in their own abilities and observations without someone there to help ground them. Having a partner to go through lifes hurdles with you whom you have a close bond of trust offers a lot of opportunities for personal growth, if you're both in a healthy place.

The criticism and pain that comes out even more once you've gotten comfortable with each other some might say is a con to a relationship, but it doesn't have to be. It gives you both an opportunity to develop the capacity for a great amount of love and that is a very very good thing. You can develop this and gain these benefits to a degree within non-romantic relationships, but I think it's even more effective in a romantic one. People for the most part seem to take heed to the words and criticisms of their romantic partners moreso than friends. I'm aware there are always exceptions to the rule, but this has been what I've observed, and it makes a lot of sense. A friend you most likely do not live with and spend most of your waking hours with. If you have spats, you can simply widen the distance between you whenever you desire without necessarily ruining your friendship. This is not really the case in a romantic scenario. When this distancing begins to happen in a romantic relationship, your relationship is in jeopardy.
 
Jill Hives said:
This is so true. I was thinking something sort of similar to this actually as I was pondering over this. The pros to being single essentially boils down to the freedom, but too much freedom can sometimes cause a person to become lazy about their self development. Or they could become too confident in their own abilities and observations without someone there to help ground them. Having a partner to go through lifes hurdles with you whom you have a close bond of trust offers a lot of opportunities for personal growth, if you're both in a healthy place.

The criticism and pain that comes out even more once you've gotten comfortable with each other some might say is a con to a relationship, but it doesn't have to be. It gives you both an opportunity to develop the capacity for a great amount of love and that is a very very good thing. You can develop this and gain these benefits to a degree within non-romantic relationships, but I think it's even more effective in a romantic one. People for the most part seem to take heed to the words and criticisms of their romantic partners moreso than friends. I'm aware there are always exceptions to the rule, but this has been what I've observed, and it makes a lot of sense. A friend you most likely do not live with and spend most of your waking hours with. If you have spats, you can simply widen the distance between you whenever you desire without necessarily ruining your friendship. This is not really the case in a romantic scenario. When this distancing begins to happen in a romantic relationship, your relationship is in jeopardy.
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I can't imagine how far backwards I've gone in my entire lifetime of having been single. Yet it seems like people I get involved with (for however long it takes for me to get bored of them and run off to find someone else) tend to pretty much make me out to be Jesus...............
 
Pros:

- Freedom
- Alone time
- Bed all to myself... unless the cat does a MacGyver move and breaks down the door
- No children to worry over and protect

Cons:

- Lonely at times
- On the practical side... not on his health insurance, which means I either have to work at a job I loathe which offers the insurance or go broke paying it out of pocket myself
 
Genuine said:
So, our world glories freedom, independence, etc. We're told to be happy single, and see it as a heightened state of freedom and satisfaction where all dreams can be fulfilled without the weight or responsibility of a partner.

But seriously, is it always so great being single? Is it really all that it's made out to be?
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the only difference between my relationship with my partner and being single is that i am sexually monogamous.
the rest of my life is much the same as if i were single.
i think for some it's a case of the grass being greener on the other side (regardless of which side you are on) but i say screw that misconception.
all you have to do is fertilize the grass you're on. make the life you have as green as it can be and then run through it in your bare feet and smile.
 
A bad relationship state can cause anxiety, and a bad single state can cause depression.
The grass is always greener on the other side.
I guess our challenge is to make the best of what we have.
What is right for one person mightn't be best for another.
We are all just trying to not be lonely.
 
... Huh. Instead of empowering me, this thread just made me aware I am in fact single and that regardless of the pro's people listed, I'm actually ready not to be unattached anymore.
 
I do as I please.
 
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