How you are perceived | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

How you are perceived

I'm perceived by man to be impervious when it comes to my emotions, when everything is going wrong I stand there with a smile on my face and laugh, when life saps me round the face I just look back with my shit eating grin and keep advancing, but I'm not impervious as many of my friends like to perceive me. I'm actually full of uncertainty and doubt and actually just put the front of optimistic go getter on because otherwise no one else will.

Everyday on public transport I'm stared at oddly as though I'm not who I should be or I don't fit into the other person's ideal average man, sorry but that's not my fault I look this way because I was born this way, I don't look like this by choice and the waste coat is merely an 'accessory' to my office wear to hide the fact that I'm actually rather skinny and a little vulnerable.

It's very few people who really get to see me for who I am but even they don't get to see the whole picture as I generally keep them at arms length and the one person I let see everything just ended up betraying me like so many others. I suppose really I'm like a picture with invisible messages written all over me and no one really wants to get close enough to put an ultra violet light up to my skin to see what's written.
 
Ada said:
Then you're fortunate/lucky if you get what you want. For me "to wish", "want", "desire", "long for" are all synonyms and mean more or less the same thing. I wish/want/desire and even need the same things because why wouldn't I want what I can't have. I don't have a capability to buy a house in cash right now, for example, but it doesn't mean I don't want to. If I ever get it is a question because plans can be always destroyed by the certain events.
The same goes for a "wish". I wish I were stronger and I believe I can become it with time, patience and discipline. A wish in this case is my driving force.
So pardon me, with all due respect I didn't exactly understand what you've written. Looked up the definitions of the words in the dictionary as well. While I get the subtle details but it is just the same thing to me.
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its a method of directing ym mental resources.
By categorizing my desires according to the rationality of each desire.

Thus to waste less stressing on my appearance and more on what i can actually affect.

My desires would quickly tear me in half if i didnt think them thoroughly.
 
Vilku said:
its a method of directing ym mental resources.
By categorizing my desires according to the rationality of each desire.

Thus to waste less stressing on my appearance and more on what i can actually affect.

My desires would quickly tear me in half if i didnt think them thoroughly.
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I see your point now. I think not everyone is able to rationalize desires (hinting on myself only, of course). :) I know some things I desire aren't rational, so they remain my dreams, at least for now.

P. S.
just to clarify: I didn't talk about the appearance.
 
I don't really know how I'm perceived but my most consistent compliment is that I'm intelligent so I've got that goin for me at least. :)
 
I'm pretty sure that I know myself a lot better than anyone else does, and if that doesn't come through all the time and someone judges me because of it, then that's their problem not mine.

Well, except for work… I kind of have to hold back/play ball for that one.
 
Hard to say how others perceive me...I usually ask that question of people because I know what's me on the inside is NOT readily apparent and I havent gotten back very good answers, in my opinion.
But on a very surface level, people see me as a mysterious, sexual creature, a femme-fatale,
1227.gif
pretty and sexy and guys usually wanna fuck me. Some women, too!

If anyone can see deeper, I am VERY impressed and want to know more about them.
 
I dont care about how people perceive me. Only a few people truly matter to me and their opinions I respect, but even then, it doesn't make a difference I am going to be who I am regardless of the pressures people put on me. I've walked alone my entire life, and I am frickin good at it now, no reason to change that for anybodys prejudicial ideas. Life is WAYYY too short to worry about what other people think of me. And the people that matter to me, dont mind me anyway, so if someone does, then they can see themselves out of my way, I dont have time for haters.
 
Angelbabe2000 said:
Hard to say how others perceive me...I usually ask that question of people because I know what's me on the inside is NOT readily apparent and I havent gotten back very good answers, in my opinion.
But on a very surface level, people see me as a mysterious, sexual creature, a femme-fatale,
1227.gif
pretty and sexy and guys usually wanna fuck me. Some women, too!

If anyone can see deeper, I am VERY impressed and want to know more about them.
Click to expand...

(poker face) I can see deeper.
 
Ada said:
I see your point now. I think not everyone is able to rationalize desires (hinting on myself only, of course). :) I know some things I desire aren't rational, so they remain my dreams, at least for now.

P. S.
just to clarify: I didn't talk about the appearance.
Click to expand...

i didnt refeer to you by it, just one of the desires i find hardest to rationalize considering the importance it plays on character playing.
 
if someone thinks poorly of me, it can be disheartening. if it’s warranted, i try and look within, if not, then i usually withdraw because of hurt feelings.

authenticity and kindness: these are good attributes. i would feel quite content if someone thought these things of me. because i *try* to be this way.

i don’t care so much about the rest. that will come later --- if it feels right , if it comes naturally, then we will share each other.
 
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Sometimes if I walk with my eyes somewhere else and think without thinking, or doing other such things which bring that "daydream" feeling, then I feel like I am perceiving my own self from a point of view outside my body. Like a ghost following closely behind. Obviously it's imagination but since touch a vision is a combination of what you see from a different literal POV, and the position of my body relative to itself which enables on to imagine easily the moving of arms, head, etc.

Have you ever felt like your eyes were facing the back of your head? Or perhaps felt as if you were observing everything before you from deep (or as deep as it gets i guess lol) like within your skull? It happens (more than once) if I walk fast and shifty with my eyes to the ground while thinking deeply about something. I look funny but it's very easy to see myself, perhaps the eye position really does have something to do with it.

I'm almost certain that there is some part of psychology which analyzes the physiology of eyeballs.
Just an internet-educated guess. :)
 
...have fun walking fast and having shifty eyes as well. :D
 
I want to be perceived as:
sensitive, intelligent, considerate, and wise

I don't want to be perceived as:
pushy, arrogant, intolerant, and incompetent

I guess all of those things are true of me, so I'd be willing to bet that is how I'm generally perceived.


I used to worry a LOT (hypersensitivity, paranoia, depression--the whole 9) about being misunderstood, misrepresented, not liked, etc. but I really don't care about it that much anymore.

I won't give a sermon here, but it's 100% thanks to Jesus Christ that I have peace and rest about this.
 
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Sriracha said:
I'm comfortable with the way people perceive me, whether it be positive or negative. I can't bother myself with how everyone feels about me. My peers understand that we are all human, that we all have strengths and weaknesses.
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^ This.

With that:

The only perceptions of me that I care about are from the people that I personally respect and admire. I would say that I have good moral character; I'm honest, respectful, and kind to others. I can sleep soundly at night knowing that I've never bullied someone out of spite, have been honest in the face of opposition, and have always taken responsibility for my own shortcomings. And of course, I always love with lots of effort.
 
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