How does love feel?
- Thread starter Gaze
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I'm starting to question the idea that love is ultimately a feeling. Sometimes, it's seem more knowing than feeling. Feelings seems skewed to personal perceptions of the person. When I begin to think outside of myself to consider the person's preferences, likes, and needs, I see the beginnings of real love, not romantic love. When you are willing to put your feelings or thoughts aside, to allow them to express their thoughts or ideas with you, this could be love, although it doesn't have to be. When you're willing to sacrifice your wants to help them, this could be love. Of course, if they're not willing to do the same for you, then love or not, there should be apprehensions.
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- Sep 28, 2008
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Right, love is ultimately a knowing. What I described earlier in the thread is the epitome of new love, or puppy love. Somewhere between Philia and Eros.
Love, as it becomes more of a knowing and more of an almost instictive act or behavior toward nurturing and/or developement (see Agape); things can sometimes become scary, if there is fear among one partner it will affect the other. Ultimately a lot of feelings become intertwined, and if one partner is not doing what's best for the both of you you will both feel suffering.
It's easy to see where the whole "two become one" idea came from, not only from the standpoint of child rearing.
Agree, it does become more instinctive, where you stop thinking of me vs. you. Instead, you think in terms of us. Not that you don't have your own wants or needs, but you incorporate "us" into the picture. And that nurturing things is quite true.
In the beginning it's euphoric. The sense of being accepted for who you are allows you to let down your guard enough to usher in all sorts of gooey feelings. Then as Wyote said,
If you are a person that strives to evolve or change this will impact the dynamic of your relationship. Some people fear that change and thus unconsciously try to stifle growth. The thing is, by doing this, they are limiting themselves to what can be rekindled from the past. Which is a shame because there is nothing like experiencing all those gooey feelings, all over again, for someone you have been actively supporting while they have changed and matured.
Love is one of the most beautiful things in the world. Words can't even begin to describe it, but I suppose I can begin to try.
Love is like being lit on fire without being burnt.
You can trip over love and get up. But fall in love, and you fall forever. (quote by ???)
Sorry, too cheesy??
Love is like being lit on fire without being burnt.
You can trip over love and get up. But fall in love, and you fall forever. (quote by ???)
Sorry, too cheesy??
I like the death reference....
I would go with scary and disruptive
Not in a really bad way but it isn't all roses and freaking lollipops
Words, words, words. Knowing or feeling or...whatever, it doesn't matter. Whatever it is, though, it sure knocks you for a loop. It certainly disrupted my life in the beginning. But, it soon became the ultimate comfort and meaning in life. Those who can't love have empty lives.
still haven't had the chance to experience it, whatever it is. And the reason why is because it's been too easy to confuse love with infatuation. Love has to involve action and goes beyond whether you like the person or what they can do for you. It involves a level of selflessness which you don't feel for anyone else. And you can't simply transfer those feelings to someone else. And I think it's something you have with the person, not for them. I honestly, can't any longer see defining love as one-sided. It has to be mutual. And I would describe less as a feeling than a unique experience you share with someone, sometimes without reservation. It's scary because we can't believe we found something so calming or satisfying or all encompassing. It's surprising because it's unexpected how whole it makes you feel. In some cases, you feel unworthy of it because it's more than you imagined.
It's distracting. Somehow everything, no matter how unrelated, somehow reminds you of her - and when you think of her explicitly, or worse, when you actually see her, you get a shot of good adrenaline and feel totally transported into a different, more alive state.
