Am I considered a pervert? | INFJ Forum

Am I considered a pervert?

InTheWomblikeCocoon

InTheWomblikeCocoon

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Sep 13, 2008
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I have an obsession with having intercourse with a girl. I am a female, and I like women. However, I dont want to do this in the conventional girl way, I want to "force" myself on her somehow, and penetrate her...omg I am so embarassed to be revealing this but I really do have fantasies of it daily. Hourly, possibly. Of course I have no phallus, but I could use anything to do the job. Am I a female pervert? Is this the thought of a rapist?
 
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Firstly: are you joking?
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
I have an obsession with having intercourse with a girl. I am a female, and I like women. However, I dont want to do this in the conventional girl way, I want to "force" myself on her somehow, and penetrate her...omg I am so embarassed to be revealing this but I really do have fantasies of it daily. Hourly, possibly. Of course I have no phallus, but I could use anything to do the job. Am I a female pervert? Is this the thought of a rapist?
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Thinking of and desiring sex does not make you a pervert and wanting to have sex does not make you a rapist. If you think about raping people, it might be the thinking of a rapist, but as long as thoughts stay thoughts (in my opinion) you're doing nothing wrong. If you're uncomfortable with these thoughts, have you considered counseling? Not someone to 'diagnose' you, just someone to talk with and someone who will listen objectively.
 
If you did it to someone who was unwilling then yes, if it's just fantasy then no.
 
I wouldn't call you a pervert, however i do believe you need as mf said a counselor. Someone who will listen and help you understand better whats going through your head. Bottling up things like this almost always have a negative impact.
 
Firstly: are you joking?
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I understand that the absence of any emotional cues in electronic text can come off as ambiguous at most, but I would hardly place the words rape and joke in the same sentence.
 
I just want to make clear that I'm not recommending a counselor because I think what you're thinking is wrong. Just that if it really is bothering you so much that it might help you to have someone to talk with.
 
Penis envy is a joke.

Are you trying to suppress the desire?

And I don't think that what you're experiencing makes you a pervert. However, because the thoughts are disturbing you, you should be concerned- not because you're a "pervert" or "not a pervert" but because they are upsetting. Do you feel a lack of control in your life? What are the factors in your life making you angry?

There is no need to answer any of the questions I just asked on the forum. They're just something for you to think about.

I also think this be moved to a more appropriate section, either "Mature" or "Emotional.....".
 
Seriously, I don't think this is anything to worry about. There are much stranger fetishes out there, and the fact that you're bothering to ask about this suggests that you're not about to go acting out your fantasies on an unwilling participant.
 
I'll give you all a scenario: A (straight) friend and I get home after a long night of partying. We sit together on a bed and casually lay about, parts of us touching every now and then. I then get closer to her, and my "feeling" comes. I am burning with passion; she is tired and quite unassuming. She knows about my sexuality. I roll over to get on top of her, and she says something like, "What the hell are you doing?" I then start to touch her in those places. She now is overtly refusing all my advances. I resist. I continue to touch until i get inside of her. I am trying as hard as I can not to go into too much detail. She is trying to get off of the bed. I let her go once I am "satisfied"
That is a typical fantasy for me. I am reluctant to call myself a rapist because I have never done this. I would highly doubt it would not happen if I were drunk.
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
I'll give you all a scenario: A (straight) friend and I get home after a long night of partying. We sit together on a bed and casually lay about, parts of us touching every now and then. I then get closer to her, and my "feeling" comes. I am burning with passion; she is tired and quite unassuming. She knows about my sexuality. I roll over to get on top of her, and she says something like, "What the hell are you doing?" I then start to touch her in those places. She now is overtly refusing all my advances. I resist. I continue to touch until i get inside of her. I am trying as hard as I can not to go into too much detail. She is trying to get off of the bed. I let her go once I am "satisfied"
That is a typical fantasy for me. I am reluctant to call myself a rapist because I have never done this. I would highly doubt it would not happen if I were drunk.
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You're not a rapist; it's nothing more than fantasy.

There is nothing wrong with the feeling or the desires.
 
Oh, and I neither envy nor desire a penis, it is the act of "getting in" that does it for me. this is applicable to other sexual orifices (I am sure you know what I mean)
 
People have written stories about such things, between characters in books, movies, TV shows and the like. But it usually *stays there.*

If you are having actual urges and desires that grow stronger the more you think about it, then you might want to see a counselor or therapist. Otherwise, write it out and leave it for your own personal amusement.
 
I find thoughts of forcing anything on anybody disturbing, and hinting at other problems not relating directly to sexuality.

If they're really nothing more than thoughts then maybe it doesn't matter and you're free to enjoy the fantasy.

If however it has crossed your mind to attempt it should the perfect opportunity arise without you getting caught, then yes, you're a pervert and you need help.
 
I've met people who are the opposite

Men who want to be raped...
Of course their boyfriends just play a 'game' with them
Role-playing
So no one gets hurt in the end...
 
I would not want to hurt anyone in the process, not like a predator would. I guess this is bordering on sexual sadism
 
It sounds like it might be an obsession/compulsion for you. OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder) can make you feel things that are uncomfortable to you very strongly - they can be graphic and constantly repeating. You might consider reading about OCD - even if it's just to see if it's not true.

And if it's purely about power/sex - that's why almost everywhere you go has S&M clubs.
 
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The fantasy isn't really the problem, the question is are they consuming. Do they prevent you from focusing or working. Do they inhibit social interaction and things like this. If you feel that your uncomfortable with your own desires then you should find a good counselor.

If it's anything more then a fantasy it can be dangerous.
 
I would describe it as an urge to engage in the act. On a scale of one to ten for urgency to complete the act, I would give it a 7. is this enough to merit red flags?
I think about this daily.
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
I would not want to hurt anyone in the process, not like a predator would. I guess this is bordering on sexual sadism
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I think this is understandable :) S&M

I don't know if it is available where you live
It is definitely underground. I've found advertisements for it in city communities on livejournal

If there is a gay district in your area, if you know anyone who lives there, they will probably know. Gay bookstore for example, very helpful. There are all types of postings everywhere


I know for sure Japan's the best place for this ^^
You can live out all of your wildest fantasies
 
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