Am I considered a pervert? | Page 4 | INFJ Forum

Am I considered a pervert?

InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
My mother was not a very strong figure, she was not very good at enforcing her own rules. So, yes, I think that she did try and fail to be a strict disciplinarian. I always thought of her as authoritative. What does this have to do with my obsession?
Click to expand...


My theory is that the strongest habits we have are often formed in childhood.
Your description of wanting to "get it" in the face of resistance, could, out of context, sound like a little girl wanting to get something from either mother or father, despite the fact that the parent didn't want to give it.

I have also heard many people say that if a parent lays down rules and spells out consequences for bad behaviour, it is of paramount importance that those rules and punishments are kept and that the parent does not cave in. The reason this seems important is so that the child does not begin to form habits relating to manipulation, bypassing rules and laws, or failing to see the connection between actions and consequences.

I supose, my theory, from what you had described, was that at some point you became accustomed to getting some special treat or something you really wanted by getting people to cave in or fail in maintaining their position resisting your wants.
 
Last edited:
I don't really follow you; but I was diagnosed with borderline personality with psychotic tendencies and bipolar 2
I am also avoidant and paranoid
 
It means that at times I believe people know what I am thinking, that they are trying to influence my emotions with their behavior, that certain people are secretly in love with me, that I am a godsend, that evil spirits want to sabotage my success, that everyone needs me.
I also frequently dissociate, have deja vu, and "change personalities"
 
Do those disorders affect the way you behave directly, or do they just affect what you think and feel (indirectly affecting behaviour)? Ie. Do you do things involuntarily?

As for the previous point - I am hypothesising as to possible scenarios in which you would have started to associate overrunning resistence with what is pleasurable.
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
It means that at times I believe people know what I am thinking, that they are trying to influence my emotions with their behavior, that certain people are secretly in love with me, that I am a godsend, that evil spirits want to sabotage my success, that everyone needs me.
I also frequently dissociate, have deja vu, and "change personalities"
Click to expand...


Would this be fair to say: you regard most, if not all, of what you observe about the world (besides yourself) in relation to yourself.

If so, does the interaction between two people distant and unrelated to you hold any interest for you?
 
That is it. everything is about me, and I am rarely interested in the relations two people have unless I am involved.nHowever, most people do end up talking about me amongst themselves
 
Perhaps you notice that people talk about you, because you notice what makes others different from you: they are interested in you, even though you might be completely distant and unrelated to them.

The interest of others in you, is not (in the large part) like your interest in others. I am interested in you as part of an innate curiousity about the world outside and not related to me. When you are interested in someone, it is directly related to you.

I can understand how you might be subject to some paranoia, except for the realisation that most other people are different (strange to you) in how they consider what surrounds them.
 
I dont understand the last sentence; do you mind clarifying yourself? Are you saying that I dont understand how people could be interested in me for reasons other than what I think they are?
That is not true; they do talk about me...I have had evidence of this. They usually feel threatened by me and want in some way to make me feel as inadequate as I must make them feel.
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
I dont understand the last sentence; do you mind clarifying yourself? Are you saying that I dont understand how people could be interested in me for reasons other than what I think they are?
That is not true; they do talk about me...I have had evidence of this. They usually feel threatened by me and want in some way to make me feel as inadequate as I must make them feel.
Click to expand...


My point is that most other people are significantly different from you: your attention to others is "INTERESTED" while most people regard strangers in a "DISINTERESTED" manner. That is to say, people may talk about you, without having any intention good or bad towards you, because most people are able to be interested in what is unrelated and distant to them - as strange as this will seem to you. Moreover, this interest in the distant/unrelated people can often produce no desire whatsoever to draw them into some sort of relationship.

In fact I think I probably have a tendency opposite to yours. I like to know about people, but I like to keep to myself and don't want any personal interaction.


As for the paranoia - if the world was filled with people identical to you, you might have good reason to think that if someone talks about you, they may have intentions towards you. But most people (vast majority) are content to talk about other people (including you) with no intentions towards them/you. - so you don't have to worry about what most people might want from/with you, because they might just be curious about you.
 
Last edited:
Flavus Aquila said:
My point is that most other people are significantly different from you: your attention to others is "INTERESTED" while most people regard strangers in a "DISINTERESTED" manner. That is to say, people may talk about you, without having any intention good or bad towards you, because most people are able to be interested in what is unrelated and distant to them - as strange as this will seem to you. Moreover, this interest in the distant/unrelated people can often produce no desire whatsoever to draw them into some sort of relationship.

In fact I think I probably have a tendency opposite to yours. I like to know about people, but I like to keep to myself and don't want any personal interaction.


As for the paranoia - if the world was filled with people identical to you, you might have good reason to think that if someone talks about you, they may have intentions towards you. But most people (vast majority) are content to talk about other people (including you) with no intentions towards them/you. - so you don't have to worry about what most people might want from/with you, because they might just be curious about you.
Click to expand...
I do not just choose random people; they give me reason to think what I think by their actions. It is as if they give off some sort of energy that I can detect, and this is what you would call a glance, or a sound, some kind of cue that I pick up. They don't intend to invoke my attention however; they just give off the energy that I can detect.
But this whole thing has gotten way off topic. I just know how to read people well, and they are interested in me because they KNOW I can see through them, and fear that power.
 
InTheWomblikeCocoon said:
I do not just choose random people; they give me reason to think what I think by their actions. It is as if they give off some sort of energy that I can detect, and this is what you would call a glance, or a sound, some kind of cue that I pick up. They don't intend to invoke my attention however; they just give off the energy that I can detect.
But this whole thing has gotten way off topic. I just know how to read people well, and they are interested in me because they KNOW I can see through them, and fear that power.
Click to expand...

Being able to see through people is an ability particular to N-types. But we are so relatively common (less than 50% of people, admittedly) that I suspect that most people are not put off by our ability to see.

Returning to the topic: are you a pervert?

I think you probably have a healtheir dose of narcissism than most people and that overcoming/belittling others (physically?) excites you. But this doesn't mean that you are a pervert, you simply have a distinct way of looking at the world.
 
Flavus Aquila said:
Being able to see through people is an ability particular to N-types. But we are so relatively common (less than 50% of people, admittedly) that I suspect that most people are not put off by our ability to see.

Returning to the topic: are you a pervert?

I think you probably have a healtheir dose of narcissism than most people and that overcoming/belittling others (physically?) excites you. But this doesn't mean that you are a pervert, you simply have a distinct way of looking at the world.
Click to expand...
So, I am a narcissist because I can see people's beliefs? And I think that perversion is a relative term. Sex is a very open category and can be done in however way the person sees fit, no matter how "sick" it may be to you, or society.
 
No, you are a narcisist because you see everything only in terms of how it relates to you, including other people's beliefs.

Perversion is not exclusively sexual in my opinion.
 
I am not a narcissist, and I see how it relates to me because it does. I do not make it up. I could randomly ask someone if they were talking about me, and they would probably say yes, how did you know that?
I have a hypervigilant extra sensing ability most people don't have...such as yourself
 
Look, you are a pervert. To everyone trying to rationalize her wanting to rape someone, well you all boggle me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: acd
Satya said:
Really? And you base this insight into human psychology on what? Exactly how do you "check" fantasies?
Click to expand...


Simple question, do you do things without thinking on them. Are you less likely to do some thing that you constantly think on.

as for keeping things in check, my bet is that you need your own system. mine would be working and doing, Idle hands quickly fall into temptation.
 
I really thought about this. You said that someone was presumptive. The thing is that you are asking what people are thinking and he told you. You are contemplating something that is a very evil act of hurting someome. I am not saying you are evil. You are contemplating something that is evil. Everything is cause and effect. This cause will come back to you in some way or other. The thing : How would you feel if someone was contemplating this on a family member of yours? Does that change this? Someone was thinking about doing this to your mother or sister or cousin. How does that change this fantasy. Fantasies create energy. I had a problem with the OCD that Moxie was talking about. I got my but to a therapist and told them everything. He worked with me using a type of therapy and it is gone. I chanted alot about it to change this problem and happily I did . OCD can go comorbidly with ADD sometimes. Generally, the people that are having this problem are the exact opposite and would not do any harm. The horror is what fuels the thoughts. What I am reading here is that your like this kind fantasy. Thoughts can fuel negativity and are in themselves creating a cause which has an effect. I can't stay silent about this. I just keeping thinking about that woman who was gang raped in California. People stood by and let it happen. The thoughts you are contemplating is evil to violate someone that way. You still have a buddha nature. You still have that inner goodness. This is your fundamental darkness. The thing about fundamental darkness is that you have a choice. Get help or not. If you don't get help you are choosing something that will have ramifications for you and an innocent soul that is someones Mom, or sister or cousin.
 
sookie said:
I really thought about this. You said that someone was presumptive. The thing is that you are asking what people are thinking and he told you. You are contemplating something that is a very evil act of hurting someome. I am not saying you are evil. You are contemplating something that is evil. Everything is cause and effect. This cause will come back to you in some way or other. The thing : How would you feel if someone was contemplating this on a family member of yours? Does that change this? Someone was thinking about doing this to your mother or sister or cousin. How does that change this fantasy. Fantasies create energy. I had a problem with the OCD that Moxie was talking about. I got my but to a therapist and told them everything. He worked with me using a type of therapy and it is gone. I chanted alot about it to change this problem and happily I did . OCD can go comorbidly with ADD sometimes. Generally, the people that are having this problem are the exact opposite and would not do any harm. The horror is what fuels the thoughts. What I am reading here is that your like this kind fantasy. Thoughts can fuel negativity and are in themselves creating a cause which has an effect. I can't stay silent about this. I just keeping thinking about that woman who was gang raped in California. People stood by and let it happen. The thoughts you are contemplating is evil to violate someone that way. You still have a buddha nature. You still have that inner goodness. This is your fundamental darkness. The thing about fundamental darkness is that you have a choice. Get help or not. If you don't get help you are choosing something that will have ramifications for you and an innocent soul that is someones Mom, or sister or cousin.
Click to expand...
I do not intend to rape anyone.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back