My mother was on the phone with my grandmother and was talking about some political issues to her that she had questions about. They conversed for about a half hour, and when my mother got off the phone I decided to comment on what she had said on the phone. Yeah, I know it's ease-dropping but I had been led to believe that it would be okay to do this, because my mother had recently been engaging in similar political conversations with me due to her activity in several political forums. I liked these discussions, so I decided to jump in and started a new one.
When I began to speak right away I knew I was being misinterpreted by her. She was talking about abortion and how she knows a woman who has had 7 abortions and currently has 5 children, at the age of only 38. She was talking about how she thinks that is wrong from her personal standpoint and how she wonders what they did before abortion, if maybe women were more careful and did not fuck around like that. Well, I expressed the opinion that I believed marriage was made partially because women were fucking around and the men wanted to have legitimate children, so infidelity was quite scorned upon and there were serious punishments for it.
My mother took offense. She started to argue that yeah, she knows what I am saying which is that marriage is bad and it's to suppress women's rights and that another reason marriage was invented, at least in America, was to give women the rights to property and stuff if their husband died they would have the house property and kids, etc. She just went on and on at this point and thought that had been what I was talking about. She then stated that she didn't understand my argument, that first I was talking about how bad marriage was and she agreed and then I'm trying to tackle her views on abortions because she knows we have opposing opinions on it.
I disagreed and said that I hadn't even been talking about whether marriage was right or wrong I was just answering a question she had asked with some knowledge that I knew, and that really the incidents in America happened later on- I was talking about some of the main reasons Marriage was invented when it came to be about thousands of years ago.
From there things just spun out of control. She was talking about how the world is made up of feelings and that people who try to argue about the facts like science, especially athiests, are weak people who have been hurt in the past so they've grown an arrogance to attack people's personal beliefs by using facts to somehow disprove their thoughts. She then went on about how my intention was to bring down her arguments to prove I was right, and mock and laugh at her beliefs because I believe I am superior to her.
This was -not- intended at all, and I tried to explain this to my mother but she seemed to ignore me. We agreed to not let this happen again by not discussing politics together because my mother insisted she had strong points of views and would likely get mad at anything I had to say because my views were so different then hers. She tries to act like certain groups of people like athiests are closed minded but I kind of feel like she is being closed minded here. I just am amazed at how differently someone can take what you say, I mean, she took my words and then put a hidden agenda to them and completely twisted them.
I am thinking, maybe this is because she is an INFP and I am a ISTP? She thinks we think so differently, and I guess that's true. To her, when she is talking about her beliefs it's about what she thinks is right or wrong and how she feels about things. To me, it's about what makes sense, what could possibly be universally applied and how my arguments hold up against others.
Do you guys have a problem with people who just I suppose are so different from you they misinterpret what you are saying and put intentions to your actions that weren't there, all mystifying you in the process?
When I began to speak right away I knew I was being misinterpreted by her. She was talking about abortion and how she knows a woman who has had 7 abortions and currently has 5 children, at the age of only 38. She was talking about how she thinks that is wrong from her personal standpoint and how she wonders what they did before abortion, if maybe women were more careful and did not fuck around like that. Well, I expressed the opinion that I believed marriage was made partially because women were fucking around and the men wanted to have legitimate children, so infidelity was quite scorned upon and there were serious punishments for it.
My mother took offense. She started to argue that yeah, she knows what I am saying which is that marriage is bad and it's to suppress women's rights and that another reason marriage was invented, at least in America, was to give women the rights to property and stuff if their husband died they would have the house property and kids, etc. She just went on and on at this point and thought that had been what I was talking about. She then stated that she didn't understand my argument, that first I was talking about how bad marriage was and she agreed and then I'm trying to tackle her views on abortions because she knows we have opposing opinions on it.
I disagreed and said that I hadn't even been talking about whether marriage was right or wrong I was just answering a question she had asked with some knowledge that I knew, and that really the incidents in America happened later on- I was talking about some of the main reasons Marriage was invented when it came to be about thousands of years ago.
From there things just spun out of control. She was talking about how the world is made up of feelings and that people who try to argue about the facts like science, especially athiests, are weak people who have been hurt in the past so they've grown an arrogance to attack people's personal beliefs by using facts to somehow disprove their thoughts. She then went on about how my intention was to bring down her arguments to prove I was right, and mock and laugh at her beliefs because I believe I am superior to her.
This was -not- intended at all, and I tried to explain this to my mother but she seemed to ignore me. We agreed to not let this happen again by not discussing politics together because my mother insisted she had strong points of views and would likely get mad at anything I had to say because my views were so different then hers. She tries to act like certain groups of people like athiests are closed minded but I kind of feel like she is being closed minded here. I just am amazed at how differently someone can take what you say, I mean, she took my words and then put a hidden agenda to them and completely twisted them.
I am thinking, maybe this is because she is an INFP and I am a ISTP? She thinks we think so differently, and I guess that's true. To her, when she is talking about her beliefs it's about what she thinks is right or wrong and how she feels about things. To me, it's about what makes sense, what could possibly be universally applied and how my arguments hold up against others.
Do you guys have a problem with people who just I suppose are so different from you they misinterpret what you are saying and put intentions to your actions that weren't there, all mystifying you in the process?
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