Knowing when to chill | INFJ Forum

Knowing when to chill

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Wyst, May 6, 2010.

Share This Page

Watchers:
This thread is being watched by 5 users.
Page 1 of 7
More threads by Wyst
  1. Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2009
    Threads:
    57
    Messages:
    1,913
    Likes Received:
    233
    Trophy Points:
    622
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Alright - so I've got this coffee date tomorrow with a girl I met last weekend. Asked her out on Sunday and we decided on the time and location on Monday.

    It has felt like an eternity just to get to Thursday morning and I won't even see her until tomorrow night. Aaagggghhhh.

    I really want to initiate some sort of "Hey, how's your week going?" kinda text message thing but I don't want to be to clingy before we even have coffee once.

    Should I chill out and just wait until tomorrow since I know I'm going to see her then? Or do you think she might wonder what's going on since she hasn't heard anything from me since Monday night?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #1 Wyst, May 6, 2010
  2. WellNoWonder

    WellNoWonder Peace Through Action

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2009
    Threads:
    67
    Messages:
    1,107
    Likes Received:
    208
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    6w5
    *pinches cheeks*

    You're too cute....

    I say...text her...

    "looking forward to coffee tomorrow. Hope your week has been well..."

    Somewhere along those lines...

    what do you think?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #2 WellNoWonder, May 6, 2010
    Gaze likes this.
  3. testing

    testing
    On Holiday

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2009
    Threads:
    37
    Messages:
    902
    Likes Received:
    90
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    qwer
    Chilling is overrated, I think.

    Text her! Text her! Just to say hi and you're looking forward to the date!

    A text message is not stalking or attaching yourself to her like velcro... I don't think it moves into the realm of clinginess.

    (But you should probably also see what other people say too... Personally I am a bit clingy myself and try not to overdo it. Must be an INFJ thing.)
     
    #3 testing, May 6, 2010
  4. Soulful

    Soulful life is good

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Threads:
    249
    Messages:
    4,999
    Likes Received:
    713
    Trophy Points:
    245
    MBTI:
    ♥
    This. I think it's a good combination of neither clingy nor too detached. Enjoy your date!
     
    #4 Soulful, May 6, 2010
  5. Morgain

    Morgain defective wisdom
    Donor

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2009
    Threads:
    114
    Messages:
    2,720
    Likes Received:
    466
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ again
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Don't be to clingy, it is not very attractive (in my opinion). when I have a date I don't like to get messages like "how is your day going". Just don't nag me untill the date. Unless I'm allready in love with you :).

    the only type of message I can tolerate before the date is to confirm that you are going to be there, or to arange something for the date. Isn't there anything you have to organize. Do you know exactly the time, place, ...
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #5 Morgain, May 6, 2010
  6. OP
    Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2009
    Threads:
    57
    Messages:
    1,913
    Likes Received:
    233
    Trophy Points:
    622
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    Thanks everyone :)

    See.. ^that is what I don't want to do.

    All the details have already been decided - both time and location. One of the last things we said was "See you Friday".. which to me, since I'm such a pessimist means, "the next time we'll talk is Friday".

    Someone, please fast forward the time continuum!
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #6 Wyst, May 6, 2010
  7. Wyote

    Wyote (#/-\[]$ ([]`/[]'|'[-
    Staff Member Administrator

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2008
    Threads:
    246
    Messages:
    37,772
    Featured Threads:
    19
    Likes Received:
    206,542
    Trophy Points:
    4,271
    Gender:
    Male
    MBTI:
    Ni Space
    Enneagram:
    9 Seas
    I think WNW's idea is perfect. Don't ask questions, just let her know you are looking forward to it and let it be.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #7 Wyote, May 6, 2010
  8. Gaze

    Gaze
    Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2009
    Threads:
    2,385
    Messages:
    28,116
    Featured Threads:
    99
    Likes Received:
    21,684
    Trophy Points:
    1,906
    MBTI:
    INFPishy
    This^^
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #8 Gaze, May 6, 2010
  9. under skies

    under skies Community Member

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2010
    Threads:
    1
    Messages:
    637
    Likes Received:
    107
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFP
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    I second this (/fifth? sixth? I didn't count.). If you keep things short and simple, it won't seem clingy at all but will still give the impression that you're thinking of her, which is nice.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #9 under skies, May 6, 2010
  10. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
    Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2009
    Threads:
    289
    Messages:
    10,787
    Likes Received:
    1,930
    Trophy Points:
    453
    MBTI:
    Meh
    Enneagram:
    Meh
    Yup, to tag along with everyone else. Just say something short and simple like "Looking forward to Friday." You don't have to have a conversation through texts, but let her know you haven't forgotten about it without being to overtly excited.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #10 bamf, May 6, 2010
  11. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
    Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2008
    Threads:
    762
    Messages:
    14,154
    Likes Received:
    1,298
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    1w2 sx/so/sp
    I don't really have any advice but I have to say you sound EXACTLY like I do when I am getting to know someone, I do internal backflips and feel like I am going to do the smallest thing wrong.

    From what I have learned, if the person is legit into you, it's pretty hard to slip up :).
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #11 IndigoSensor, May 6, 2010
  12. OP
    Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2009
    Threads:
    57
    Messages:
    1,913
    Likes Received:
    233
    Trophy Points:
    622
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    True true!



    Thanks everyone :)
    I sent her a "Looking forward to tomorrow! Hope your week is going well :)" text about two hours ago.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #12 Wyst, May 6, 2010
  13. That Girl

    That Girl Do you have my answers?
    Donor

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2010
    Threads:
    29
    Messages:
    1,634
    Likes Received:
    270
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INTJ
    You never know what will happen. My boyfriend texted me two seconds after I met him and we're still going strong regardless of his clingyness. <.< >.> Don't tell him I said that.
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #13 That Girl, May 6, 2010
    Wyst likes this.
  14. OP
    Wyst

    Wyst Are you there?

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2009
    Threads:
    57
    Messages:
    1,913
    Likes Received:
    233
    Trophy Points:
    622
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    4w5
    She texted back!

    And she asked me a QUEESSSSTTTTIIOOOOOOOONNN!!!!!! :m180:
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #14 Wyst, May 6, 2010
    rawr and IndigoSensor like this.
  15. testing

    testing
    On Holiday

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2009
    Threads:
    37
    Messages:
    902
    Likes Received:
    90
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    qwer
    YAY!!!!

    :D

    I am dying to say I told you so... So I will!!! HAHAHAHA! Too much chilling is way overrated -- it's just cold. Have fun on your date!
     
    #15 testing, May 6, 2010
  16. Soulful

    Soulful life is good

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Threads:
    249
    Messages:
    4,999
    Likes Received:
    713
    Trophy Points:
    245
    MBTI:
    ♥
    Sweet! :m168:
     
    #16 Soulful, May 6, 2010
  17. WellNoWonder

    WellNoWonder Peace Through Action

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2009
    Threads:
    67
    Messages:
    1,107
    Likes Received:
    208
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Enneagram:
    6w5
    yay!

    :m015:
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #17 WellNoWonder, May 6, 2010
  18. RecklessDreamer

    RecklessDreamer Permanent Fixture

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2009
    Threads:
    17
    Messages:
    1,067
    Likes Received:
    140
    Trophy Points:
    0
    MBTI:
    IDFK
    Enneagram:
    69

    What was the question?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #18 RecklessDreamer, May 6, 2010
  19. rawr

    rawr ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2010
    Threads:
    123
    Messages:
    7,301
    Featured Threads:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2,370
    Trophy Points:
    867
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Earth
    MBTI:
    IxTP
    Enneagram:
    human
    thanks, i wanted to know too, i just didn't want to be the awkward one to ask it:m131:
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #19 rawr, May 6, 2010
  20. Blind Bandit

    Blind Bandit Blind Man Being Lead to Nowhere
    Donor

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2009
    Threads:
    132
    Messages:
    3,870
    Featured Threads:
    2
    Likes Received:
    1,110
    Trophy Points:
    792
    Gender:
    Male
    MBTI:
    INFJ
    Swweet! tells us what did she ask you?
     
    Stop hovering to collapse... Click to collapse... Hover to expand... Click to expand...
    #20 Blind Bandit, May 6, 2010
Page 1 of 7
Loading...
Similar Threads - Knowing chill
  1. Odyne

    What is the key to knowing you better?

    Odyne, Jan 10, 2012, in forum: Relationships and Sociology
    Replies:
    36
    Views:
    2,986
    CAptain
    Jan 11, 2012
  2. AUM

    Small talk and not knowing what to say

    AUM, Jun 6, 2011, in forum: Relationships and Sociology
    Replies:
    54
    Views:
    12,044
    Billy
    Jan 9, 2012
  3. Gaze

    Knowing vs. Showing?

    Gaze, Jul 30, 2010, in forum: Relationships and Sociology
    Replies:
    4
    Views:
    1,215
    Ergo Christobal
    Jul 30, 2010
  4. Eniko

    Knowing others better than they do

    Eniko, Aug 16, 2009, in forum: Relationships and Sociology
    Replies:
    21
    Views:
    3,070
    Gaze
    Sep 13, 2009

Share This Page