INFJ males who are you attracted too? | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

INFJ males who are you attracted too?

I think the key to a successful ENFP relationship is finding an ENFP who shares the same biases that you do.
 
I've never been able to work out someone's type because I'd have to sit through and read all the descriptions (taking a test doesn't work for someone else) and they're always halfway between a few and I don't know what's inside their head, so I just give up. And I'm not attracted to a certain personality type, more, people that I can relate to better, that I could imagine living with (out of all my friends I can think of 1 or 2 or 3 or 4 could live with, one guy (maybe) 3 girls (two I'm not sure about). They're not all the same personality types either, I'd say 3 extroverts, one introvert, and I can't work out the rest.
 
I know several male ENTPs, pity I don't know any ENTP women and what a shame there doesnt seem to be many on this forum :p. In fact it is really difficult to find an NT woman. Really difficult, plus I'm shy and don't push myself forward.

Why hullo! :eyebrows:

Oh, don't worry. an ENTP will find you. They have a nasty little habit of finding us, haha.

Indeed! :eyebrows:
 
I think a girl I like is an ENFP. Whenever I try to communicate with her- calling, texting, online messaging- I can never get hold of her. When we correspond it's always her that initiates it, it always seems to be on her terms. On top of that, a lot people have said she is quite unreliable. I'm starting to believe them. Is this typical ENFP behaviour?
 
ENFP girls are real bitches, sorry to say.

And it only makes you want them more.
 
ENFP girls are real bitches, sorry to say.

And it only makes you want them more.

How come? Can you elaborate? I've been doing some research and so far she really matches the type, from what I can tell.
 
That is extremely typical ENFP behavior.
 
That is extremely typical ENFP behavior.

Oh okay, thanks! Is there a motive behind that behaviour or is it just because they have a million friends/get bored easily? I don't understand why she would be labelled a bitch though. She seems like the least bitchiest person- and I've met a lot of bitches!
 
ENFP's do not want to be bound to any obligation or tied down to any sceduled thing. Yet being a social type, they are always around people. Partly because of boredom they hop from person to person without warning, which can make them appear bitchy to people by appearing fake.
 
I've spent quite some time with her and had long conversations with her and she does not come off as bitchy in the slightest. But I do see that "Hopping from person to person" thing, which feels incredibly frustrating.

I mean, anyone who appreciates meaningful relationships, which she obviously does, would surely be adamant about maintaining regular contact? Surely they recognise that that is conducive to good relationships?
 
Not necessarily. They like keeping contact -- but sometimes it's hard for them to maintain regular, committed contact
 
Mysterious girls with a contained energy. Like they can just stand there perfectly still and vibrate with a certain intensity. Not a negative intensity - it can even be a gentleness about them.

I've never been able to explain it properly. It's just that they have a depth and so much more to them than most girls.
 
Not necessarily. They like keeping contact -- but sometimes it's hard for them to maintain regular, committed contact

How annoying. Well how do I keep the ball rolling if I can't even communicate with her?
 
You can't. I left my hunnybug ENFP girl ages ago.
 
You can't. I left my hunnybug ENFP girl ages ago.

I can't? So that's it is it, I can't do anything? So that's like saying "Oh you like girl and you know she likes you, but because she's an ENFP, you can't doing anything about it". That sounds like a load of bullshit to me.
 
Eh, you're probably more clever than me and can come up with some nifty solution.

My solution was to stop trying for her and go with somone more reasonable, less flighty.
 
Eh, you're probably more clever than me and can come up with some nifty solution.

My solution was to stop trying for her and go with somone more reasonable, less flighty.

But she is the only person I've ever wanted to go for! I can't just switch it off like you and 'get someone else'. And as for a solution, I don't have a clue! I mean to get someone to stick around requires them to be able to communicate with you, which apparently is problem.
 
Well, all I know is, I couldn't find a solution to the problem. If I had really liked her, I'm sure I would have. But the cons weren't worth the pros, it wasn't worth it to have her hopping on and off like that no matter how easy it was to get around with her. I know I couldn't change her, so I decided that if I could accept the way she was then ultimately I was going to have to find an alternate route, which I did.
 
But I don't see any of that as a problem. That's just her inherent personality, that's fine by me. I accept the way she is and I like her for the qualities she has. Obviously if she has problems with committing to people, that is gonna be an issue. It would be for everyone, right?

All I need to know, is that it is not out of malice or deceit. Then I guess I would have to come up with a way of getting past her "Flighty-ness".

Also, did you ever tell the person what you felt about their behaviour?
 
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No, because she's always in a relationship with tons of different guys and it isn't appropriate. Even if I did, I'd never want to be in a relationship with her so I thought that telling her would be futile because what's the point of bursting her bubble? That's how she is, and I'm kind of like that too. I only talk to her once ever few months and then I'll talk to her a lot and then I'll forget about her for an extended period of time, etc.