How does one make a friend? | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

How does one make a friend?

Yes, Sweetdreams, I thought Tutorials would be a better place for it. However, it is the tutorials which I fear most.

Lectures are easy! One merely turns up early, finds a corner, and reads over notes in that spacious great room.

In those tiny little tut rooms with their group work and tables, there is no escape.

It's sickening.


Ugh, above all, I have to convince myself that being social is good...
 
Ugh, above all, I have to convince myself that being social is good...
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Above all, try asking yourself; why should you be social? What are the benefits, the risks, and the problems?

It's easier to 'play' when you know the reasons to 'play'.
 
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Termtime is fast approaching... And the panic sets in.

I don't want to try anymore, too much effort.

Yet I feel inclined to... Not that I need friends, I just imagine life would be easier with a little social protection, a bit of padding for the crowds, someone to consult, hell, maybe even a room-mate.

Alas... I think it is beyond me. You know, last year on day one, I sat for two hours trying to think of how best to tell the guy next to me we had identical shoes, but it just never came. Nervewracking.
 
Melkor said:
Alas... I think it is beyond me. You know, last year on day one, I sat for two hours trying to think of how best to tell the guy next to me we had identical shoes, but it just never came. Nervewracking.
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Dear goodness.

Well, try making jokes.
Even if you get to be known as 'the pervert' in your social circle, it's better than nothing I guess :p
 
It's a good thing you didn't mention the identical shoes. If I was sitting next to a person who said nothing for 2 hours and then suddenly mentions something like that all of a sudden, I would find him a bit strange lol.

I think the best way to begin practicing your social skills is during a group task or something. You start by talking about the task, giving your ideas and such and work from there. Also when the task is over, just say goodbye to your group, you'll come across as a nice person and chances are bit higher they'll start talking to you the next time.
 
Don't emotionally invest much, or you'll get torn to shreds.
 
Hey, finally, some sound advice!

Not to worry, I've only made an emotional deposit once or twice, and I have since learned to deeply regret, and henceforth avoid it.

[MENTION=3098]Avva[/MENTION]: Group tasks are the devil. The utter bane of my life. Never will I enjoy or learn from them, save to accept that humanity is well and truly doomed, and deserving of that status.
 
Melkor said:
Alas... I think it is beyond me. You know, last year on day one, I sat for two hours trying to think of how best to tell the guy next to me we had identical shoes, but it just never came. Nervewracking.
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Oh my god. I would never, in a million years, think twice about something like this ... I'd just blurt it out.



Avva said:
It's a good thing you didn't mention the identical shoes. If I was sitting next to a person who said nothing for 2 hours and then suddenly mentions something like that all of a sudden, I would find him a bit strange lol.
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I'd love it. I'd think that if he were strange, he might also be interesting.
 
:(
 
Yeah, seriously- it's not funny any more.

I've been at uni a year and haven't made any friends. There are people I will see becoming good friends with and some enjoyable acquaintances...

But my best friend turned into toxic/bullying housemate so makes me dubious about even trying any more.
 
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