Happier when things are falling apart? | INFJ Forum

Happier when things are falling apart?

Discussion in 'The INFJ Typology' started by bamf, Apr 28, 2009.

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  1. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
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    does anyone else ever feel almost good when things are going wrong at a personal level? I absolutely hate seeing other people in pain but for some reason I almost feel better when I have something to feel bad about. Maybe it's just because I love to write and the only time I have anything to write about is when I'm feeling down. I mean don't get me wrong, I'd much rather feel happy than depressed, but I'd rather feel depressed than content. It's like I feel that something is wrong and it gives me motivation to make huge and drastic changes. When I feel content I'm a a complete stand still as to what to do and it's just annoying.

    I don't know if that makes any sense but does anyone else have anything thoughts?
     
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  2. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    Ditto on that.
    Plus, when shits goin' down it's a chance to learn more about yourself and grow as a person. I get it. I'm with ya.
     
  3. IndigoSensor

    IndigoSensor Product Obtained
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    I will try to word this clearly:

    I am sort of afraid to acknolage this, because I don't want it to be true, but at the same time I do. I seem to do my best when all the chips are down, and I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. It is like everything will fall into place then, when I am not activly seeking my goal. When I am going for it though, it feels forced, fake, and doesn't work out right. I am in a constant struggle to find the middleground of all of this. At times I have managed to do so in the past, but it is a perpetual work in progress.
     
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  4. Puck

    Puck Perilous Pixie
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    I don't know about feeling happier, but I feel more alert when things are going wrong. Artistic inspiration seems to spring up from any well of pain I may be feeling, so I try to channel that energy into something useful whilst I still have it.

    On the other hand I love feeling happy so much that I don't really mind trading in artistic inspiration. I'd love to feel similarly inspired by happiness, but usually when I'm in bliss mode I just want to experience it.
     
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  5. Flavus Aquila

    Flavus Aquila Finding My Place in the Sun
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    You name something very true.

    I was basically happy and peaceful through school and into University. In ignorance, I signed on for training which inverted my life to absolute crap and misery, which took me away from everything/one I gave a damn about.

    I didn't go back - I can't go back... and as unsettling as it is - I don't want to go back.

    I can't say that I'm content, nor can I say that I am happy - but I just seem to be where I fit.
     
  6. Shadowforce

    [​IMG] The Shadow knows [​IMG]
     
  7. poetrygirl

    poetrygirl Community Member

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    I'm never content with being content. There must be something wrong! Improvement must be needed :mk:
     
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  8. OP
    bamf

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    Ah, it's so nice to know other people understand.

    Sometimes I feel i'd rather give up happiness for inspiration.
     
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  9. slant

    slant Sedated slanty

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    I only like pessimists.

    I like to complain all day about the horrors of the world while doing nothing about them, and I truly spit on people who spent their time going on and on about the 'goods' of the world.

    And, this is completely irrelevant, but holy mother of columbine! Look at this > :rapture:
     
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  10. CoffeeShopDiva

    CoffeeShopDiva Community Member

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    I often feel this way when things are going well. I worry about the eventual falling to pieces that I know MUST happen.
     
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  11. Flush

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    Actually, yes. When things are "just fine", there is no motivation to do anything. When I'm feeling down I write a lot, and somehow see things more clearly (observer instead of participant if that makes sense), which makes good writing material.
     
  12. Altruistic Muse

    Altruistic Muse Community Member

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    Yes definitely, to all of this! Whle there's enough to keep me worried in real life I actually create problems in relationships because its easier to cut out than to aim at contentment. Also when something major goes wrong, it takes me much less time to deal with it than other people I know and I don't mope for very long at all. Obstacles make me come up with solutions and I somehow find it satisfying...
     
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  13. Liv

    Liv Community Member

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    Im not in my comfort zone when things fall apart.Actually i fear this is what is going to happen if i get to accustomed to dealing with the negatives.I think about daily issues far to much for my peace of mind.Sometimes i worry about everything,it seems to be my dispostion but i refuse to let my mind at ease in the negative when i can.I strive to eventually be truly happy one day although sceptical about its possibility.Happiness is the lack of want or desire but desire and want is what compels and drives us,achieving goals which bring us fleeting joy,to remain happy seems impossible....yet i dont want to get comfortable when things go wrong
     
  14. gloomy-optimist

    gloomy-optimist Used to live here

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    Bad circumstances allow me to feel justified in my pain. If I have actual physical problems, it's okay to allow myself to be melancholy or a little selfish, and that's relieving. I wouldn't say it inspires me, although I do really only write when I'm emotionally charged, but it gives me a reason to embrace my little discontents
     
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  15. Milon

    Milon Director of Glomps
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    You did it again, Indigo. You really struck a chord in me. :) I don't like it when things don't go my way, but when it comes down to it, it just happens. When I try to pursue a goal, like you said, it feels forced or fake and it doesn't EVER go as planned.
     
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  16. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    i'll liken down times to the bottom of a well. as i am sinking deeper and deeper and my surroundings are becoming increasingly darker, it may be so that depression is a natural response in these circumstances.
    however, as i sink closer to rock bottom and at the point where i actually reach that lowest of lows there always comes, during all of these times, a turning point where i realize there is no way out but up from here (and literally too).
    instead of holding the rigidity of an anchor that had brought me down in the first place and cursing the darkness both within and without, this turning point bores a calmness of relaxation that floats me up to the surface.
    so yes, for me things may become happier but usually only when they reach a point so bad that all negativity becomes futile.
     
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