Do you judge people by their handshakes? | INFJ Forum

Do you judge people by their handshakes?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Quinlan, Sep 8, 2008.

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  1. Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    I've always found this a pretty bizarre way to judge someone and find it funny that people seem to accept it and promote it. It's bordering on superstitious nonsense.

    "Ohh he has a firm handshake this must mean all sorts of ridiculous things"



    Does anyone do this?

    And what sort of mbti types tend to make judgements like this?
     
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  2. scrabbleandpoems

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    I wouldn't say I would judge someone. But (this is probably me stating the obvious) I believe that most of the time someone has a weaker grip during a handshake, they're probably shy, and vice versa. I have a weak handshake, and I always think about the stereotypes of handshakes and try to make it a point to give a nice ol' strong handshake.
     
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  3. OP
    Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    But if shy people get told to do awesome handshakes then you still can't make any sort of judgement because the shy person is putting on an act of sorts.

    I suppose it shows an awareness of a certain level of etiquette...
     
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    #3 Quinlan, Sep 8, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 8, 2008
  4. scrabbleandpoems

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    I was going to say that, but in my reply I worded it funny. Thank you.
    I was thinking the same thing after I read my post. Handshakes are obviously tricky tricky things.
     
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  5. Silently Honest

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    No, too dicey.
     
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  6. Lurker

    Lurker Has nothing to destroy
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    All I know is there are some sloppy hand-shakers that give me the eeks cause they are so sloppy. Don't necessarily judge the person but try not to shake their hand again cause it's creepy [​IMG]
     
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  7. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    I'm honest... I Pre-Judge people all the time based on some of the stupidest stuff ever; Race, Religion, Gender, Age, MBTI, Fashion, Hair, Walk, Political Philosophy, Accent, Nationality, et cetera.

    I also judge people on their handshake, I cannot stand weak handshakes. I grew up with an SJ father, in an SJ nation, firm handshakes make firm personalities. As anyone will tell you, my personality is mercurial rather than firm. Hell, if you're too firm then you cannot change with the times, or if necessary, the instant. However I like the illusion of being normal occasionally, so I keep my handshakes firm, and my eye contact solid.

    I judge people on their handshake, and all sorts of other things, hell, everyone does "Negro? OMIGOD! MUGGER! RAPIST! DRUG DEALER!", "Asian? Quiet and smart, Martial artist! Don't start anything or he'll bruce lee me!", "Aboriginal? Breathe through the mouth, the MOUTH damnit, where's that deodorant? God he'll probably want money and cigarettes.". The trick is to not be influenced by prejudice. Unfortunately if someone gives me a bad handshake I start wondering what they have against me...
     
  8. Electra

    Electra Newbie

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    I don't like it when I have to shake someone's hand because it catches me off guard and then I have to make sure I give 'em a nice firm handshake so they don't think that I think I'm inferior to them (lulz). Sloppy handshakes also creep me out...in fact handshakes creep me out full stop, I'd much rather hug strangers than wiggle hands with them.
     
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  9. Shaz

    Shaz Community Member

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    I never shake hands, always kiss on the cheeks :hug:
     
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  10. G.Kai

    G.Kai Community Member

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    I've always thought shaking hands was one of the wierder of human customs. My uncles were all sadists, and they never missed an opportunity to injure a kid with a handshake. Now, there's nothing wrong with my grip - I'll attack any pickle jar in the fridge, but I am somewhat small-boned and only 5' 10" so I'm always gritting my teeth when I first meet larger men - especially at parties where I might have to meet a lot of new men. My hands being smaller, they tend to grab me by the fingers and squeeze, so that my palm never takes the pressure.

    My favorite thing to do when shaking hands: I tuck my index finger into my palm so when a guy shakes my hand he feels a bulge and I say, "Pardon the tumor."
     
  11. TheLastMohican

    TheLastMohican Captain Obvious
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    Now that I think about it, it is a strange criterion, but I do judge based on a handshake unless I have better cues to go on. According to observation, firm handshakes do often correlate to firm personalities. Probably those who pay attention to their technique are more likely to be ambitious/assertive, since they are seeking to make a good impression.

    Precisely. I was a frequent tournament chess player from about 7, so I have had plenty of practice shaking hands. My father taught me give a good firm handshake, and I sometimes marveled at how many of the other players extended limp hands and barely grasped.

    Is that the norm in Italy?

    Any reactions on tape? :pop2:
     
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  12. Silently Honest

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    LOL if someone kissed me on the cheek (In the United States) that'd say more about them to me then any handshake ever could.

    :kiss:
     
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  13. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    I HATE "air kisses" American socialites who want to pretend they're French, while at the same time, insulting the French.

    :hug: I liekz kisses on cheek
     
  14. OP
    Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    Even a :hug:makes me feel a bit uncomfortable so cheek kisses would be wierd (unless I knew them really really well).

    Shai Gar- I don't think everybody judges people as badly as you say in your first post.
     
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  15. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    i gave examples, and dude, you come from one of the more "free" nations on earth, it's a LOT less prejudiced than Australia is. Don't think everyone is nice and kind just because you yourself are. Besides, I was giving dramatic over the top examples about subconscious judging.
     
  16. OP
    Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    Yeah Australians in general seem to be a bit more like that, I'm just saying people fall somewhere in between extreme prejudice and complete impartiality.
     
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  17. sumone

    sumone down the rabbit hole

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    I have judgements spring up on me all the time or I'm aware of them anyway. Most handshakes are just good enough ordinary handshakes but with the odd one I find myself judging or pre-judging. I might not be paying much attention to a person but a handshake might make me really look at the person or pay attention.
    Through handshakes you can tell a lot about a person. You can detect illness, sadness, nervousness, ultra confidence; even joy and you can spot other things as well. If you're so inclined.
     
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  18. OP
    Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    Hi Sumone, sounds very intuitive to me.
     
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  19. sumone

    sumone down the rabbit hole

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    I don't think it's intuitive so much as it is just noticing or taking the time to see a person. Most people, maybe all, are capable of sensing these things but how many people will devote themselves to take the time to do so? We're a rush, rush, rush society and mostly we don't give a s*** about our fellow human beings.
     
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  20. OP
    Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    ...but how can you tell all of those things by handshake alone without intuition?
     
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