Annoying people | INFJ Forum

Annoying people

Silently Honest

Retired Staff
May 12, 2008
I find that alot of times, people mistake my random acts of kindness as some kind of invitation to be friends, and sometimes it's a good thing, but I find that alot of the time it's usually some obnoxious loser who needs someone to talk to or in most cases at, and I mean NEEDS.:m080:

How the do you deal with these clingy nuisances?
i tell them a pedophile joke. most people leave me alone when i tell them a good pedophile joke
Thinking about it.
Dude I said I was thinking about, not yes, if I decide to go that route I'll ask you via AIM.
What's there to think about? The idea pops into your head, you realise there's noone around whose good opinion you want, and you let the joke roll off your tongue.
That's not how FJs work and you know it. Also I want some non monkey smilies, dammit these chimps are getting on my nerves.
I don't feel like being called a faggot for no real reason so no. I'm in a bad mood.
Honestly and bluntly. Kindness is too easily mistaken and taken advantage of.
Ignore them? May be harsh, but they'd probably get the idea faster.
Man, I had a whole thing typed up and I left it alone too long...:p

In short, yes - I have "problem folks." But most of my problem folks aren't close friends and they don't feel comfortable staying around me too long. Could be the expression on my face or the idea that I'm looking at them in a different way. SH, try the "full on NFJ" if they bug you - in other words, stare straight into their eyes while they're talking. It's a scary moment for others, trust me. I normally don't stare right into folks eyes and instead look to the side because I know it's difficult to talk to me if I am.

Sometimes you'll have to grin and bear it if they're you're friends - and sometimes you'll have to flat out tell them you care about them, but you're really in the middle of something and you'll get back to them when you can.
A word of advice to INFJs out there from a person who was clingy and obnoxious, a loser and nuisance and so on for several weeks this summer. In my defence I couldn't have helped it. I was under a lot of stress, really needed someone and a very polite INFJ just happened to be at the wrong place in the wrong time. If you don't envisage forming friendship with someone or helping them or catering to their needs - whatever those might be - and you can tell that this person, for whatever reason, is unable to figure out this unpleasant fact on their own, know that honesty and straightforwardness are the best policy. If you can, be gentle, but above all be clear about what you want or don't want.
This, probably, is a very unINFJ thing to do and it will hurt but you're doing yourself and this other person a favour. I suppose that for you INFJs this is the cross you have to bear. People cling to you just like (most) people feel awkward around INTJs.
I would just avoid them or simply tell them: "Hey...I'm kinda busy...sorry, dude." And walk away.
This bothers me too. And only because I feel somewhat bad for them when I unknowingly dismiss our assumed "friendship". Yet at the same time it's their fault for diving right in right away. Man, at least test the waters before assuming such things, lol.
heh, its water off my back...

i listen, nod my head, agree... say "mhmm... mhmm... well, i hope that it works for you..." and go on...

will i remember it 10 minutes later? most likely...

but worry myself about it? probably not...

i've always been a steel safe of secrets... and i don't really talk about others at all...
Unfortunately, I'm the most annoying person I know, and sadly, I can't avoid or ignore myself. It just seems I put myself through so much irritation and trouble. :m080:

It's a good thing I can always find at least one thing I like about myself, or I would be intolerable.

The point is if you can deal with the annoyances you put yourself through, then you most certainly can deal with the annoyances that other people put you through. It's all about the frame of mind you choose to have.
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I pretty much ignore them and hope they get the idea. If not my anger seeps through in my body language and voice, but I dont think I could straight up say what needs to be said. I save that kind of straight talk for more important interactions.
I simply ignore them.

If they don't go away, It will eventually get to the point where I will say how I feel. Then 1/2 the time I will feel terrible afterwords.