Always an INFJ | INFJ Forum

Always an INFJ

Good article. Thanks for sharing. This is the reason why i question the personality test system. How do you really know what is your core self if you've been socialized to think, behave, or interact in a particular way? At this point, i think i have a clearly defined developed self which is strongly influenced by the contextual self. But i think much of who we are is a contextual self which we accept as a core self, because we are unable to imagine things differently outside of how we've been socialized. So, interesting theory but not sure. It's the nature v. nurture debate rearing it's head again.
 
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I can sometimes really function like any INXX type really as I am very moody and my tye changes accordng to my mood and environment but I think deep down I am mostly INFJ though I have always questioned my type. and my cognitive processes have been changing, I am learning to use new ones, I'm also learning the real differences and descriptions so I know which ones I really am using and which ones are not, but I guess MBTI for an INFJ can be thirsting, never-ending processes, the INFJ has always seeked to understand him/herself inside..and the process can has its positives and negatives.
 
I thought your type was the relationship between your core and contextualized self? How could it be otherwise?
 
I hope this makes sense. What I understand is that ideally, we type our core self, rather than developed or contextual selves. However, I think it's hard to strip away the influences of our environment, those influences that feel like they distance us from who we feel we really are. For that reason, I think most people know themselves along an axis between their core and developed selves. Having said that, I'm not suggesting it's possible to strip away all environmental influences or that our core self is purely 'nature' (in terms of nature vs nurture), but I do think it's possible to strip away some of them. I think that's what I would call finding oneself.
 
My core self has remained essentially unchanged all my life. I have however has several major contextual shifts that intensified my access to certain functions and helped them mature. I am just as INFJ as ever, but now I have more informaion and experience to support that.
 
I thought the theory behind MBTI states you never change are the same type with the same traits from birth until death.
 
slant said:
I thought the theory behind MBTI states you never change are the same type with the same traits from birth until death.
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I've read this too; that we're intrinsically wired a certain way. What I understand is that we can end up expressing the functions of a type other than our own, if situations require us to. It can be ongoing to the point of altogether acting like a different type. Once out of that environment or situation, a person may begin to revert back to their most natural state.
 
slant said:
I thought the theory behind MBTI states you never change are the same type with the same traits from birth until death.
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That wouldn't make sense, as MBTI as a theory seems more fluid than that. It does, after all, state that type is determined by order of cognitive preferences and we all use the same cognitive functions to different degrees. It also follows that those cognitive functions can be improved upon or diminished according to what preference we've bumped up to 'dominant' at the time. In theory, couldn't circumstances (or conscious practice?) force you to operate under a different cognitive order until it becomes second nature?

I am extremely skeptical of anything under the psychological umbrella being proclaimed as "fixed" or "unchangeable."
 
Introspiritual said:
Yes, but is proficiency the same as preference?
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No, it's not, but technically, if you're more proficient in something, chances are, you may eventually develop a preference toward it--particularly if you find that you are more rewarded by it.
 
TheDaringHatTrick said:
I am extremely skeptical of anything under the psychological umbrella being proclaimed as "fixed" or "unchangeable."
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agreed.

I think people can change, for better or worse.
 
I can attest to that... sort of. I was born an INFJ. Always tested very heavily as an INFJ (I remember being freaked out by the "Priest or truckdirver" job suggestion in highschool.)

I ended up going to grad school in computer science.

Now, if an MBTI asks about me personally, I still score as an INFJ. If I test on an MBTI that talks about "At work you do blah blah blah", I now score as a plain INF with 1% J. Basically, my adviser beat a lot of the F out of me and made me start tapping into my N more directly and then made me apply my Te to it. He loved my N, was okay with my Te, and hated me Fe.

But at heart, I'm still an INFJ. I'm just professionally tamed to be more P to compensate for my weak Te. I ended up leaving academics after finishing up degrees because my F told me to. Not gonna mold me into an INTJ, no matter how hard they try. Now I'm probably headed back to academics, but with F-supportive as an integral part of my job requirements.
 
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I have always been an INFJ no question. I tried to change certain things about myself, to become less introverted, to stop feeling so much, to stop caring so much. I did change the way I came across to people and I did learn to hide my emotions, but I still scored as an INFJ, and I became very upset reading the description because it fit me so perfectly. It came as a wakeup call to me that if I kept trying to be someone I wasn't it would just tire me out more and never fix any of my problems.

Thanks for the article!
 
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SpaceCowgirl said:
I have always been an INFJ no question. I tried to change certain things about myself, to become less introverted, to stop feeling so much, to stop caring so much. I did change the way I came across to people and I did learn to hide my emotions, but I still scored as an INFJ, and I became very upset reading the description because it fit me so perfectly. It came as a wakeup call to me that if I kept trying to be someone I wasn't it would just tire me out more and never fix any of my problems.

Thanks for the article!
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That's interesting that you say you became upset. Almost to a person, people have posted how excited they were when they read the description of INFJ. It was like coming home. I felt like I had written it about myself. But I guess I see what you are getting at with trying to change yourself. As an older INFJ, I can really relate to a lot of things you younger guys put on these threads. They are almost all things I have felt or had to go through as a kid and young adult. Being different and a feeler too makes for a tough time in this world. But if you can come out on the other side with your mind, soul, and heart intact it can also be very rewarding. Knowing and loving who you really are is a great thing. Maybe the best thing!
 
I'm almost certain I was an ESTP when I was younger. I was pretty nuts. Not sure how I completely flipped my cognitive function priorities though. I still feel like my Se is about equal to my Ti or maybe even a little higher, but my Ni and Fe are definitely above it.
 
Questingpoet said:
That's interesting that you say you became upset. Almost to a person, people have posted how excited they were when they read the description of INFJ. It was like coming home. I felt like I had written it about myself. But I guess I see what you are getting at with trying to change yourself. As an older INFJ, I can really relate to a lot of things you younger guys put on these threads. They are almost all things I have felt or had to go through as a kid and young adult. Being different and a feeler too makes for a tough time in this world. But if you can come out on the other side with your mind, soul, and heart intact it can also be very rewarding. Knowing and loving who you really are is a great thing. Maybe the best thing!
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Being upset was my intimidate reaction. Soon I realized I never hated my personality, just wanted to be able to socialize normally and not feel like a freak, and went to the extreme of trying not to feel at all. Even my initial need to change was from a separate irrational feeling of self hate, but when I found these forums it was like coming home, and seeing all the beautiful minds here made me wish I hadn't abandoned that part of myself.

My point really was that my personality survived no matter how much I tried to bash it away, which must mean its just how I was born. Once I stopped trying to change myself it was like taking off a really tight corset and being able to breath again. I think people can change pretty much anything about how they act, but these basic functions are largely unchanging.
 
That gets a lot easier as you get older. You'll find more people that like the depth you bring to things. My wife started having dinner parties and they become very popular. Turns out the conversations I was directing were making people WANT to be around us. That surprised me. Since then, I've gotten more comfortable.

I agree, taking off the Corset is a big help. Glad you found it so early. Made it easier for me when I found it, that thing was making hard to breathe!
 
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Cecilff2 said:
I'm almost certain I was an ESTP when I was younger. I was pretty nuts. Not sure how I completely flipped my cognitive function priorities though. I still feel like my Se is about equal to my Ti or maybe even a little higher, but my Ni and Fe are definitely above it.
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i can relate to this to some extent...i was pretty nuts too

i remember doing a grade 6 science presentation about the body and i made it into a skit and acted the whole presentation out with a doctor barbie using different accents. what the hell?
 
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