The paralyzing grip of self created artificial scarcity | Page 3 | INFJ Forum

The paralyzing grip of self created artificial scarcity

That’s just life I guess. Just don’t cuddle people next time unless you think you can handle it or have better signs of it being a continued relationship. Especially not random coworkers who you will have to see on a daily basis lol. Granted if someone was willing to cuddle you and showed clear romantic interest then they are being a douchebag for baiting you too.
 
This thread was less about the action itself and more about the reason why it was so upsetting.
 
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Deleted member 16771 said:
This is troubling to me, since it implies that you desire to experience feelings rather than the people attached to them, which is a subversion of love.

As a man, this raises all kinds of red flags about your potential for infidelity, since you're too able to divorce such feelings from people, and that your desire to experience them trumps your attachment to said people.
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How pray tell did you get to those conclusions? She wants to FEEL something so she is going to have affairs?

Larry
 
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slant said:
I don't just want physical touch.

I want sexual intimacy, sexual touch with another person.
Which is a very basic want.

The whole resource thing is a metaphor which may people seem to be taking literally.

All I'm trying to say is, the reason I've been so hung up on this one person when they do not want to proceed and I should just move on and find someone else to have a relationship with is that my belief was I will not find another person; that this resource of a person who I am emotionally and sexually compatible with it's scarce and therefore if I find it, that's the only person who can give that to me therefore if they don't want that with me I will never be able to have it again.

Understanding I had this mindset is helping me break free of it. Recognizing what it was that I liked about the experience helps me to find it in the future again.
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One can't solve a problem they don't know or acknowledge exists. The 1st step. You are correct awareness is EVERYTHING hence enlightenment.
 
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