The child INFJ - were we alike?

LadyINFJ

LadyINFJ

Community Member
MBTI
INFJ
Hello again. I am sorry if this topic has been discussed already, just give me a link if you have one :)


But I was wondering today what kind of child were you? Were you serious, easy to handle, well-behaving and causing no troubles or not really :m081: I wonder if INFJ children have similar traits in general.

Me, I was "a child every parent will wish for" according to my mom. Serious, well-behaving, kind of knowing things by intuition, never needed to force me to do my school homework, responsible, far too mature for my age compared to other children around me, always reading more than we were asked in school, started with my uncle's medicine books at the age of 10 and so on, and so on ...
But, and there goes the but, despite my obvious "perfectness" I had one very annoying downside. Every time my parents tried to teach me something, I answered with this bored voice: "I know, I know ...". I always knew best (I still do :m122: ), I was very difficult to get my opinion changed by others without me thinking carefully. If I change my opinion it is not because somebody said so, but because I decided it, my inner voice told me so. Quite a challenge for my parents because they always had to give really good arguments to defend their point of view in order for me to believe and accept it.
Oh yeah, my parents admit that I really knew back then and they were surprised that it seemed like I was born with this huge amount of knowledge about so many things. Creepy, eh?

Do you see yourselves to some extent in the description above or not at all?
 
Last edited:
Do we really need to go there? :mcute: I kinda threw away the key on that one.
 
Last edited:
LadyINFJ said:
Only if you want. It is quite an interesting area of investigation for me.
Click to expand...

I was exaggerating. heh.

Interesting topic.

Wasn't that bad. Fairly quiet in groups but very talkative, a bit uptight, tv addict, not very social, a bit of a loner with one or two good friends, very anxious though, socially awkward, a worrier, but in terms of school - good with reading, struggled with math, a bit of a weird one overall, etc. Good times. ;)

Hmm. It's interesting to see the comparison, and the motivations behind my actions at the time. I would love to go back and give my younger self at 12 or 13 a little pep talk.
 
Last edited:
I had a stubborn streak, too, from what I hear. Apparently, I had some interesting/unique thoughts on things, as well....perhaps a litte more indirect, subtle. I was not as outgoing as my brother or my cousins, and I tended to have a creative and imaginative side...I drew my own comic books (this was back in the '60s). Fortunately, my parents allowed me, and encouraged me, to be who I was and follow my own path without fail.
 
I'm not an infj but I can relate to some of what you've said, I was a pretty responsible kid and gave my parents no problems (very unlike my siblings). Generally I was really happy too, I remember laughing a lot, and playing outside all day with my friends. School was fun :m200:
 
Restraint, I was a bit a loner, too. Social but couldn't find other kids who were like me and shared same interests. If I could find such, probably I would be more open. Otherwise I was one of those in my class who were just way above the average, reading extra, got positive feedback from teachers who encouraged me to read and develop even more. That made me not very popular and everybody's buddy, but bleh. I remember crying once to my mom how lonely I was, asking her why there is not a single person like me to be my real friend. Must have been hard for her to see me like this since she also had some tears in her eyes but she told me that no matter what I should always stay the person I am and later in life I will meet a lot of new people and probably find somebody who is like me. Thinking of that, I really met such people :)

Randomsomeone, I also had this creative side in me and drew a lot of nice pictures, won some contests for children and so on, I am extremely happy that my parents encouraged my interests and let me be who I was - always buying me all kind of encyclopedias, materials to draw and model things. I realize how important it is that parents understand and support their children's needs.
 
I'm pretty different personality wise. I was one of those extremely hyper kids. Drew on the walls, ostracized other kids, formed a group of friends, punched and wrestled other kids, extremely competitive, rode halfway accross the city on a bike when I was 7 prompting my parents to call the police to look for me(Wasn't running away, just looking for a park. I loved playgrounds).

I calmed down a bit around 12-14.

I swear my younger self was ESTP and absolutely insane.
 
Until the age of seven I was very talkative and because being a sponge for everything around me I used to tell insane things to complete strangers. Then I just shut down and didn't talk much, and still don't. I was always and stayed despite everything a know-it-all, and my parents had a though time with me when I was teen, they just couldn't get through argument with me.

Other than that I was really responsible, a bit to serious for my age. I started reading and writing when I was four years old, first letter system my dad thought me, and the second I learned by myself, and nobody believed me that I know to read and write in both letter systems until I showed them. I could play by myself always and my parents used to tell me to play more with other children.

And at some point they were sure that I'm going to be a lawyer someday because I wrote a contract for my father to sign when I was 8, where I was to get a bike, but to obligate my father to take it to service and not to take it away from me under no circumstances. :P They used to show that off to some friends who are lawyers, and they still laugh about that.
 
Last edited:
i was kind of outgoing when I was a kid. I often gathered with friends somewhere to do all sorts of cool boy stuff :D. I was actually pretty talkative and a very active kid engaging in all sorts of activities. I wasn't thinking that much at the time, I just did stuff. Unfortunately for me, we moved out of that town to somewhere else and I struggled to get new friends and was pretty much loner from around the age of 11. I got very aware of self and surroundings and really changed a lot. Also changed me to do more one-man activity like reading, playing solo piano and focusing more on homework to excel that way.

I don't think I was INFJ as kid. more like some ESxx type. As teenager I acted invisible :\ not sure how I was then. But I guess, probably I slowly changed into something closer to your description through my teenage years.
 
Somewhere between Lyra from his Dark Materials, Punky Brewster, and Pippi Longstockings<- Nickey Long Stocking was actually my family's nickname for me.

I was a tomboy, extremely precocious, telling stories to amuse my friends and getting into all sorts of mischief. Although, its pretty sad when I think about it, because Punky, Lyra and Pippi were essentially orphans. But whatever, I always had tons of friends so I never even NOTICED how neglected I was until I was already grown.
 
I was well behaved and relatively bright as a child.

I had a strong intuitive understanding of the world around me, which was something that I felt made me different from my peers in a positive but unrecognised way. I knew that other children could not see the world nor each other with the degree of maturity and depth of understanding that I did. Also, it is said that children have no capacity for abstract thought until they reach double figures, yet I was aware of having abstract thoughts from as young as I could remember (A can represent B, since A can display the essential qualities of B. And through A we can explore how B relates to other things: B in itself, B in relation to others, and B as part of the bigger picture).

I grew up frequently rediscovering that the people around me didn't really know any better than I did about things, which gradually made me a little cynical and indifferent to asking people for their advice. I felt people's opinions were more or less mindlessly adopted opinions rather than being self-discovered, or thoughtfully considered by themselves. I found that I could emulate others thoughts and feelings, and in fact I often made a game of it in my mind, to prove a point: "I can pretty much guess what your thoughts/feelings are going to be".

I became rather strong willed and determined to be in control of myself, to decide my own actions, and to explore my own thoughts to strengthen the foundations and interconnectedness of my own understandings. I gradually lost the beliefs/ prejudices/ baseless opinions that had been imprinted upon me.

Sometimes I doubted myself, which I responded to by putting my understandings of people and the world into practice, which to a greater or lesser degree were very successful.
 
LOL, first to share this with you: http://www.forkparty.com/parenting-fails-pictures-children-smoking-drinking/

Siamese cat, now that you mentioned the contract, I made such a contract for my dad to make him quit smoking. I was so much insisting on him quitting and hiding his cigarettes since I was about 6 years old, that around that age 8-9 as soon as I learned how to write, I made a contract between me and him. He stops smoking, I study even more and help even more with cleaning home, etc. He signed it, me too and there it goes - he stopped smoking for several months and then started again :m142:

Jasmine85, I can see myself in a lot of your words, yes.

It is interesting when you try to define your type as a child. I am sure I was INFJ as a child as well since I've been quite consistent in my behavior and way of thinking throughout the years. Well, I had several months in my teen years when I was more like an ENFJ rather than INFJ but it didn't last long and there I went back to normal :m122:
 
LadyINFJ said:
Siamese cat, now that you mentioned the contract, I made such a contract for my dad to make him quit smoking. I was so much insisting on him quitting and hiding his cigarettes since I was about 6 years old, that around that age 8-9 as soon as I learned how to write, I made a contract between me and him. He stops smoking, I study even more and help even more with cleaning home, etc. He signed it, me too and there it goes - he stopped smoking for several months and then started again :m142:
Click to expand...

Hehe, my dad signed his contract too, and didn't honor it just as yours. :P I guess that you didn't end up as a lawyer also? :D
 
No, I didn't. But Law is my N3 passion after Psychology and Medicine. I am really interested in justice, injustice, fairness and every criminal getting a fair sentence according to the crime comitted. I get so frustrated when people just sneak out with some funny short sentences for serious crimes. Needless to say that I am pro death sentence in some cases.
 
LadyINFJ said:
No, I didn't. But Law is my N3 passion after Psychology and Medicine. I am really interested in justice, injustice, fairness and every criminal getting a fair sentence according to the crime comitted. I get so frustrated when people just sneak out with some funny short sentences for serious crimes. Needless to say that I am pro death sentence in some cases.
Click to expand...

wouldn't permanent incapacitation have the same effect as death?
 
May said:
wouldn't permanent incapacitation have the same effect as death?
Click to expand...

No. Because somebody is paying for their food. Who pays for the food? The tax payers. I don't want my tax to go for such things. And as long as they are alive, there is always a chance to get out of jail and comit another crime. I always get totally pissed off when I hear/read about somebody who was in jail, sneaked out for good behavior and then raped/killed somebody. Oh so angry I become and so sorry I feel for the victim that could have been OK now. This could be prevented. Yes, I might seem extreme to some of you, but I wish the criminals just stayed in jail as long as possible.
 
LadyINFJ said:
No. Because somebody is paying for their food. Who pays for the food? The tax payers. I don't want my tax to go for such things. And as long as they are alive, there is always a chance to get out of jail and comit another crime. I always get totally pissed off when I hear/read about somebody who was in jail, sneaked out for good behavior and then raped/killed somebody. Oh so angry I become and so sorry I feel for the victim that could have been OK now. This could be prevented. Yes, I might seem extreme to some of you, but I wish the criminals just stayed in jail as long as possible.
Click to expand...

tax revenue is used for all sorts of things the general public (including yourself) wouldn't approve of though. such as new roads which conveniently never get built. it doesn't take that much to keep a person fed behind bars. and militarily expenditure for practically every sovereign nation is far beyond the necessary amount to keep that country safe; some of that could easily be used to house prisoners (and ensure the security is high enough so that they don't escape). as for getting out for good behavior and killing again, that's clearly a weakness of the legal system; simply executing people is not answer to it, the legal networks which allow prisoners to take advantage of them and rejoin society need to be adjusted.

btw i don't think you're being extreme, just passionate. i kind of admire it.
 
Well looks like things have not change much..

I was a very shy and quiet child, I would barely say a word. I remember the teachers even suggesting I might have autism, since I was often lost in my world according to them. I was considered bright and intelligent though and I would always perform well throughout all my school years. I was a loner, well pretty much always have been a loner till about now. I had no friends and well not even acquaintances. I was considered an outcast by many.I was ignored, but part of me ignored said solitude yet I was a very lonely child. I had emotional problems in Elementary and Middle school, heck my first suicidal attempt was in the 6th grade. I was overly emotional and sensitive. Easily crying. I was also the counter of the male stereotype, which caused a lot of bullying. I would prefer reading, writing, playing with stuffed animals over lets say physical activity..well that's about it..
 
LadyINFJ said:
No, I didn't. But Law is my N3 passion after Psychology and Medicine. I am really interested in justice, injustice, fairness and every criminal getting a fair sentence according to the crime comitted. I get so frustrated when people just sneak out with some funny short sentences for serious crimes. Needless to say that I am pro death sentence in some cases.
Click to expand...

It's my passion too, but seeing my INTJ sister practicing law I get that I would be too passionate for a lawyer. She is much more cool-headed than I am, and the injustices that I would be exposed every day would probably make a very angry person of me.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top