Pet Peeves | Page 17 | INFJ Forum

Pet Peeves

Yes. When it concerns technical work.

You are or you aren't

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I used to think this was the case. I don't think indecisiveness is dependant on anything MBTI

Seriously, after a bit of thought, I think you are right ruji. The reason no decisions are made in a group of people is because no one is willing to take charge and take ownership of the decision. This has nothing to do with P or J but something in their personality that says, "Damn it. If no one else will take charge then I'll do it so we can get the job done" which is something I would do. How about that I educated myself!! :grinning:
 
Seriously, after a bit of thought, I think you are right ruji. The reason no decisions are made in a group of people is because no one is willing to take charge and take ownership of the decision. This has nothing to do with P or J but something in their personality that says, "Damn it. If no one else will take charge then I'll do it so we can get the job done" which is something I would do. How about that I educated myself!! :grinning:

No, you were right the first time. All P's are like that.

 
Seriously, after a bit of thought, I think you are right ruji. The reason no decisions are made in a group of people is because no one is willing to take charge and take ownership of the decision. This has nothing to do with P or J but something in their personality that says, "Damn it. If no one else will take charge then I'll do it so we can get the job done" which is something I would do.
Te/Fi and Fe/Ti are decision functions. Each type has one or the other, so we tend to be more decisive one way or the other (T or F)

A random link with an explaination: http://www.lessons4living.com/judging_functions.htm

How about that I educated myself!! :grinning:
latest
 
When people don't confirm a time for definite plans or when they spring the time on me moments before the meeting.

People who complain about something they are not contributing to or helping with. “Complaining about a problem without posing a solution is called whining.” - T Roosevelt.
 
Frustrating. But on the flip side, it would also be frustrating to say no, and get shit for it. Honestly, most people are like that: both getting mad at decisions people make, and not making decisions.

Well, specifically, I help a few people with some tasks. They're not great at scheduling when they'll need me. :)
 
When someone doesn't want to make a decision on a plan you offered, make it clear they will not have another chance. People tend to not value things they didn't earn.


Hahahaha! A few months ago my SO offered someone who wants to break into the movie industry a temp job because he needed the help on a specific production. She didn't make a decision, acted wishy-washy, and acted like the offer would be availably indefinitely. He asked someone else and the second person he asked now has a budding career in the industry. Maybe the first girl will get another opportunity, maybe not, but my SO won't offer second chances.


"TO HELP THEM SCHEDULE BETTER" – bwahahahahaha!
 
Fucking hooligans (fresh story incoming)
I just nearly got into a fight.

Essentially I'd been at the library - finished reading but couldn't concentrate enough to write, so I decided to do my shopping while the shops were open. Then, on my way back from the shops, walking towards home, this happened:

Walking along the riverbank with two large shopping bags in hand, headphones in, and satchel fool of work-stuff around my shoulder, I notice a man (early 20s I'd guess) looking at me and talking, so I take out an ear of my headphones and approach him. He was with a group, drinking on a slipway into the river.

He was saying, 'give us a can, mate', and I said '[chuckle] Oh I don't have any, but you seem to be doing alright', and walked off, but I noticed that another lad in the group was pissing in the river, so I must've given a funny look towards him (in eyeline of the other lad) as I walked away.

After about 15-20 feet, I notice a bottle sail by me (well wide), obviously having been thrown by the group, so I turned around and took out my headphones, placing them in my pocket.

At me turning around, a blond guy (the pisser) started posturing and advancing on me, though they were pretty far, at least 25+ feet away or maybe 3 car-lengths. I stood there, and put down by bags, looking at them incredulously, though I don't think anybody could've gauged my expression.

He kept advancing and stopping, taking back steps as he literally puffed out his chest (phantom lats syndrome), looking to his mate (the 'brunette' who asked me for a can). His mate started tenuously advancing, too, as the other guy was like 'come on!' and the girls in their group called out for them to stop.

I just stood my ground, and waited for them to advance. I put my arms out at one point as if to say 'why is this taking so long'. Eventually they retreated and went back to their slipway, out of sight, though I stayed there for a little while before carrying on my way (with one eye over my shoulder).


Now, I'm 6' 1" and around 220lbs right now (I've lost about a stone recently because of a breakup), and I would guess that one of them was something like 5' 8"-9" and the other maybe 6', but both of them looked like welterweights to me. Not intimidating on their own, but two of them is a big step up (I'm convinced that even the toughest dude is going to lose when outnumbered by determined men in real life). So my heart rate was going, and I wasn't sure how it would play out. I was standing my ground in any case and the plan was just to strike the blond as soon as he got into range, because he was advancing ahead of his buddy for some reason, and then keep my distance and see what the other bloke would do - 'kite' them almost if they were able to take the hits. I was prepared to get beaten up, for sure, but I would inflict as much damage as possible before that happened.

I thought about how precious my research was, and my shopping, and didn't really want that stuff to get thrown into a river or something, and decided against advancing on them, though I had that impulse for a brief moment. I was definitely pumped and ready to go, a mix of fear and aggression and weirdly all the things I've said in the past about 'honour' and so forth - like I'd confined myself to a course of action based upon the words I've been telling myself for a long time. That was the strangest feeling - a kind of resignation based on remaining consistent, like 'oh well, I guess I have to do this now'.

As I walked home, though, I became furious at the thought that this guy had gotten away with throwing a bottle at a stranger unpunished. Though it went clear of actually hitting me, that's pretty intimidating behaviour which ought to land him in prison in my view. Despite this I felt like I had no personal recourse to deliver this kind of immediate punitive justice to the guy - two guys (I think I saw another one in their group, too) is slim odds.

The last time something like this happened was Christmas, when some hooligans drove over my mum's front lawn on a quadbike, though nobody actually tried to physically intimidate me - they were pretty meek. The lad who did it didn't return and his friends completely disavowed him.

Fucking hooligans, I can't stand them. Always they're trying to impress some girl by trying to intimidate strangers - honestly this never happens when it's just men on their own.
 
When people don't confirm a time for definite plans or when they spring the time on me moments before the meeting.

I kind of let that slide when people have crazy schedules, but confirming plans moments before the meeting is extremely inconsiderate.

I personally dislike people cancelling plans at the last minute when the plans actually involved some kind of investment (whether time or money). It's cool if you need to cancel, and yeah, sometimes emergencies happen, but if you're making a habit of being a flake, I'm going to stop inviting you to stuff.