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Pet Peeves

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by mochi, Jun 11, 2011.

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  1. sassafras

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    • People who are indecisive. Particularly when a group of indecisive people gets together and tries to figure out what to do.
    • People who get mad at you when you disagree with them or make the disagreement a bigger deal than it has to be
    • People who give horrible driving directions
    • People who create problems with their own disorganization and then look at you like its your fault or demand you drop everything to solve their issue right the fuck now
     
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  2. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    *spitefully makes terrible decisions, and insists everyone agrees*
    I think this is a learned skill, one learned after all the life lessons required of being decisive for others.

    It's easy for a disagreement to get emotional and with each participant to be out of sync with each other's intentions and implications of each point made.
    I am insistant on pushing my point forward when I am sure the other person has a few concepts required for the point to be understood, missing. I shouldn't care, but at the same time, I can't continue a conversation when it's predicated on something I know is wrong.
    In the end it doesn't even matter (linkin park). However, people should still accept my wisdom because I have all the answers.

    I kinda think this is a learned skill, one that is no longer even needed: Google maps tho

    Abstract: People who offload the consequences of their own faults onto others. And generally being shitty.
    I ask myself why would anyone do this? All the answers are depressing anyway, and I have to save myself the trip down the rabbit hole of resenting humanity.
     
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  3. sassafras

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    You try not being annoyed when it takes over a month to decide where you're going to have a birthday party with six people.

    It depends on the disagreement, certainly. Some subjects are personal or inherently volatile and it's understandable that people get upset from time to time. But that's not what I had in mind. It's more of a 'how dare you disagree with me' or 'you don't love me if you don't agree with everything I say' sort of thing instead of a 'I understand your position and it upsets me that you have that position' sort of thing.

    Fair. But I still judge hard when you don't know the main streets around your own city.

    Word.
     
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  4. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    I figured, or at least was aware of the many ways an argument can be expressed. I just wanted to say ruji stuff.
     
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  5. sassafras

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    I appreciate the ruji stuff. It often opens up some scrumptious food for thought because you generally call it as you see it. :)
     
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  6. Freaky Chameleon

    Freaky Chameleon Community Member

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    Oh those "P" types. LMAO :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:
     
  7. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    I used to think this was the case. I don't think indecisiveness is dependant on anything MBTI
     
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  8. Freaky Chameleon

    Freaky Chameleon Community Member

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    I don't knooow??? Me having a very strong "J" find such things very annoying. Just make a decision damn it so we can all move on! I've even been complemented by other J types many times for my decisiveness "Thank god some body made a decision". But that's just been my experience working with large groups of Js. Yours may be different.
     
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  9. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    Maybe you determine people's type based on their decisiveness
     
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  10. Will

    Will Wintertime

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    When people don’t return tools back where they belong. Or take stuff from your desk and don’t return it.

    How hard is it to put a stapler back! Feel like Milton. LOL.
     
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  11. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    This is one of mine as well. Abstract: when people leave things in a state that is worse than what they got it. Whether is be a worse condition, wrong location, wrong time, wrong anything.

    You know, people just being inconsiderate and shitty again. It all comes back to this, doesn't it? Why can't people just not be shitty?
     
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  12. Hostarius

    Hostarius Gimme that WOAD

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    This is a pet peeve of mine, too, or rather, something which I devote a lot of intellectual energy to in the course of my work. Solve this problem, and we solve the problem of political polarisation more generally imo.

    The root of it seems to be in the psychological assignment of causes to persons, which is especially problematic when it comes to ideas. Essentially there is a deeply held sense that your ideas are deeply rooted in your fundamental character, and their shape and form is a reflection of you. I'll quote from a paper by Fritz Heider (one of the originators of social balance theory), which I'll also attach if anyone gives a fuck (though this particular question comes in under attribution theory):

    To some, because there is this link between ideas and the personalities which generate them (so for example, 'bad man = bad ideas'), they tend to relate to them as if they were persons, and so it is quite possible to get into a situation whereby you, another person, and an idea form a triad which would need to be 'balanced' as if the idea were another person. If you both like the idea, that's not a problem and the triad is balanced; if you both dislike it, same again - it's balanced. However, if one likes the idea and the other dislikes it, then this invokes a loyalty mechanism whereby the triad needs to be balanced by a change of opinion. If the triad were three people (and not two and an idea), you can see how this forms a natural evolutionary response - loyalty and balance is critical to survival (knowing who your enemies are, &c.).

    I've experienced this personally, where my mum (bless her) holds certain delusions about people coming into her house and 'swapping things'. She will demand that I believe her out of 'loyalty', and if I object, withdraws her assent from things I've asked her to believe, which usually goes like this: 'if you don't believe me that my neighbour is stealing my gas, then I don't believe you that your wallet was stolen'. There's a transactional, loyalty-based colour to the exchange of ideas, rather than a more collaborative 'let's find the truth' approach.

    It invokes a loyalty mechanism that can become very dangerous indeed, because this kind of thinking is generated by (I believe) more basal and primal survival instincts.

    Breaking this personification of ideas is key to our political health as a civilisation imo, but the example that at least you two have been able to do it is heartening. Personally I think the trick is to regard all ideas as transient and provisional (as 'positions' - and this is good language), and try to completely separate them from the persons who hold them.
     

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  13. Freaky Chameleon

    Freaky Chameleon Community Member

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    Nope! Where I previously worked, it was mandatory training for engineers to take a MBTI 3 day course. The class I attended had 20 engineers. At the end of the course, the test was given and the result was literally 75% ISTJ and 25% INTJ. Being new to MBTI, I was surprised by the result and made a mental note of it. When working with large groups of engineers at meetings, decisiveness was always appreciated and indecisiveness was met with grumbles out in the hall away from management ears. I heard the same thing time and time again over my long career. Would a room full of other types feel the same way in the same situation? I have no idea. No experience. Truthfully, if your experience is different, I would like to know. Educate me.
     
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  14. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    [​IMG]
     
  15. Hostarius

    Hostarius Gimme that WOAD

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    Are you INTJ?
     
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  16. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    50% INTP 50% INTJ
     
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  17. Hostarius

    Hostarius Gimme that WOAD

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    You ruji?
     
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  18. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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    Yes, I am ruji.

    INTP
     
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  19. Freaky Chameleon

    Freaky Chameleon Community Member

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    Good One!!! :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:
     
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  20. Freaky Chameleon

    Freaky Chameleon Community Member

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    Yes. When it concerns technical work. Why? What gave it away?? :tearsofjoy:
     
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