Need advice about the girl I like. | Page 2 | INFJ Forum

Need advice about the girl I like.

hm you guys are right.. i can sense it, like she likes me alot more then she might think wise and like maybe since she is always helping me out its she doesnt see it as a good idea for her to be with me.

makes sense, she is so independent. never has she taken my help when offerd, never has she asked for help.. but why would she if she thinks maybe i'm not strong enough... well thats interesting.
 
Why's will have you tied up in knots of confusion. There is no real understanding of why someone might do something. Here's an example of the weird shit people do.

Her: Hey! I like you and want to be with you. Lets be together.
Him: Oh wow! Great I like you too, you're exactly the kind of girl I like. In fact I think you're my soulmate. Um....no.
Her: What? I like you, you like me lets do this thing.
Him: The thing is, you are sooo great and so amazing and I feel so inadequate. So no.
Her: So you want to turn a 'could mess up' into a 'definate mess up' over nothing?
Him: No. I like you so much that I must protect you from the shameful and terrible thing which is me. I just know
I'll do something stupid and hurt you so better not to get involved in the first place. You are too good to be with.
Her: You know, you don't have to be so elaborate. This sounds like bullshit just tell me you don't like me and I'll be fine with it and move on.
Him: But I do like you. I adore you in fact. I like you so much that I can't possibly date you. I can't lie and say I don't like you because that would be really inauthentic of me. Instead I need you to realise that you are probably the love of my life and that's why I won't be with you.
Her: No! There must be a way we can work this out. We both want to be together, it's just not fair that you're refusing to be with me over something I can't even understand. There is nothing stopping us.
Him: There is something stopping us, my incessant need to protect you at all costs even from me.
Her: So you're going to break my heart over nothing?
Him: No I'm breaking your heart now, to save you from having your heart broken later by me. And I'm doing this because I'm loving you on a spiritual level that transcends mere mortal lifetimes.
Her: Yeah right. Jerk!

*Walks off*
 
Why's will have you tied up in knots of confusion. There is no real understanding of why someone might do something. Here's an example of the weird shit people do.

Her: Hey! I like you and want to be with you. Lets be together.
Him: Oh wow! Great I like you too, you're exactly the kind of girl I like. In fact I think you're my soulmate. Um....no.
Her: What? I like you, you like me lets do this thing.
Him: The thing is, you are sooo great and so amazing and I feel so inadequate. So no.
Her: So you want to turn a 'could mess up' into a 'definate mess up' over nothing?
Him: No. I like you so much that I must protect you from the shameful and terrible thing which is me. I just know
I'll do something stupid and hurt you so better not to get involved in the first place. You are too good to be with.
Her: You know, you don't have to be so elaborate. This sounds like bullshit just tell me you don't like me and I'll be fine with it and move on.
Him: But I do like you. I adore you in fact. I like you so much that I can't possibly date you. I can't lie and say I don't like you because that would be really inauthentic of me. Instead I need you to realise that you are probably the love of my life and that's why I won't be with you.
Her: No! There must be a way we can work this out. We both want to be together, it's just not fair that you're refusing to be with me over something I can't even understand. There is nothing stopping us.
Him: There is something stopping us, my incessant need to protect you at all costs even from me.
Her: So you're going to break my heart over nothing?
Him: No I'm breaking your heart now, to save you from having your heart broken later by me. And I'm doing this because I'm loving you on a spiritual level that transcends mere mortal lifetimes.
Her: Yeah right. Jerk!

*Walks off*



Yeah.
This is definitely realistic.
Reading this sad piece of literature just breaks my little feminine heart.




It sounds similar to the start of some bad movies I've seen..




I don't mean this offensively.
I'm just bad at jokes.
 
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Well thank you all for your feed back, though I hope I didn't make my infj look all bad.. she is a good person who just happens to have motives I don't always get.

All I can to is move on.

After all me not understanding her on every level isn't rare. Maybe its for the best.
 
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Oh and by the by folks

I'm a WOMAN, Not a dude... thanks lol.


___

I don't mind and don't feel bad if some folk thought I was a guy, I just didn't want to let you all think that and later have people think I was posing a guy or something.

again I am thankful for all your advice, I have decided to let her be and if she comes to me great if not.. oh well.


 
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again I am thankful for all your advice, I have decided to let her be and if she comes to me great if not.. oh well.


i think that's very reasonable of you =) i hope you're okay with your decision.
 
i think i'm okay as i'm gonna get. i like having options and the idea that later i might not feel okay with not doing more to make it work out kinda sucks. so i'm open to changing how i go about this if i come up with something better or if she gives me a sign or something.

till then i'm just gonna chill. besides i learned ages ago i cant force her in any direction, she is stubborn if she thinks she is right.
 
Is it just me or does this post relate to another post on the forum? Not that I'm going to say which as I might be wrong; or even if I'm right, I wouldn't necessarily want to enlighten everyone to this connection because... well anyway

Maybe I'm just imagining things that aren't real and this is a coincidence. :m075:


Onto advice... Get over her. Never once have I heard of anything working out where someone sits in their duff and waits eons for another person to change their mind. Screw people like that, honestly. I think you probably screwed up your relationship somehow to begin with, or maybe she's straight, maybe not. Anyway, it wont work, like you've already realized. I'm sorry. :(
 
Oh by the way, my father is an ESTP and I've always wanted to meet a female one. So hi! I might bug you in PM's or something.
 
lol yeah i likely did mess it up. i am slowing getting over it and lately she's been kinda surprising me in a bad way, it sucks.. i feel disapointed in my friend.

oh well what can you do.
 
No, I think I'm just confused, my N drew a connection that wasn't really there.