Is it easier or harder to love or be loved? | INFJ Forum

Is it easier or harder to love or be loved?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Gaze, Aug 29, 2010.

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  1. Gaze

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    Is it easier or harder to love or be loved?


     
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  2. The Jester

    Should I interpret 'to be loved' as: hard for me, because I'd feel uncomfortable, or rather that I'm not usually loved?*

    *Hypothetically speaking :p
     
  3. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    MUCH easier to love.. being loved is scary

    edit: maybe i should rephrase that, lol
     
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  4. OP
    Gaze

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    +1 definitely.
     
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  5. rawr

    rawr ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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    to love is easier, for me.
     
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  6. OP
    Gaze

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    :D The first one, definitely NOT the latter.
     
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  7. The Jester

    Oh yeah, it's 'to be loved' for me.
    I wouldn't trust it if someone told me they loved me.

    I'm not insecure though, just paranoid ;D
     
  8. Melkor

    Melkor Madman with a cause

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    Stupid question.

    In most cases it's going to be easier to love.

    As this is an INFJ forum, I'd say in nearly every case it will be as above.

    Why bother asking?

    With a personality like mine however, you might find it a fair bit harder to EXPRESS love, but you'd be just as vunerable to it... I don't enjoy the act...

    Oh, and looks/personality wise, I'm near impossible to love, so my answer:

    Loving: No difficulty setting, difficulty implies a task or sense of control, love is automatic.

    Loved:Impossible
     
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  9. The Jester

    Lulz Melky, you're a damn liar.
    If that's you in the picture.

    I'd totally have consensual sex in the missionary position with you.
     
  10. Zero Angel

    Zero Angel Permanent Fixture

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    I would say that it's easier to love. The first part is something that is always in ones domain of control. To properly receive love, one needs to be open and trusting. That's a pretty big order for most people and is often not sustained (due to suspicions, doubting the motives of your loved one, etc.)
     
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  11. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    LOL

    i love you jester =D
     
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  12. yumiii

    yumiii Community Member

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    You'd have consensual sex with anything that moves.

    Thread response, easier to love of course.
    The concept of being loved is short of...daunting.
     
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  13. The Jester

    I LOVE YOU TOO APRIL ;D <33




    See guys? I can be emotional and feelish, and express my love.
     
  14. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    being loved also makes me love people more though, so it's like a loop. one feeds into the other; they're not mutually exclusive
     
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  15. enfp can be shy

    enfp can be shy people vs the bad people?
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  16. TinyBubbles

    TinyBubbles anarchist

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    More more! :3 the world needs more love, am i right? maybe the reason why being loved is scary is because it doesn't happen enough :p

    [MENTION=2635]Melkor[/MENTION] you underestimate your loveability ;D you have a candidness and humbleness that is beautiful
     
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  17. Odyne

    Odyne ===========
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    I am having a hard time with both! lol If we are talking about a romantic relationship; then it's hard for me to feel for the person, and if I don't feel for the person I will have a hard time accepting their love, because I am not reciprocating. I honestly don't know what's wrong with me lol. This coldness is starting to freak me out. Ideally, I would love strongly, and I would want to be loved back.

    If it's friendships or family, then my love will be in the form of support and care. I will always be there for those who need, and I will always encourage my friends and family to be the best they can be, and help them realize and reach their potential. In that aspect, I guess yes, I can love. I can also say that it's easier for me to love and harder to be loved.

    I know I am loved by my family and friends, but I don't feel comfortable when its expressed too much. I feel very awkward. Knowing that the love is there is enough for me, however I don't like being pampered and I don't like being fussed over. Let me do the fussing. A few kind words are enough. :p
     
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  18. OP
    Gaze

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    +1
     
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  19. 894tt3h9

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    I feel actual love for very few people. I feel affection and care, but actual love is very rare. There are a lot of people who love me though. I can see why, but it's not reciprocated in any way. So it's easier for me to be loved because that seems to happen more frequently. I just can't be bothered to love too many other people.
     
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  20. KazeCraven

    KazeCraven Graduated from Typology : May 2011
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    ???

    Maybe I'm misinterpreting the question, but I would say it's far easier for me to be loved than to love. Yes, I can get uncomfortable if I think I'm getting more love than I deserve (maybe there's something wrong with the idea that love needs to be deserved, hmmm... ah, but I digress...), but it's very hard for me to love. However, when I say this, I'm referring to love as in what you do, not love as in how you feel. The latter seems to be irrelevant, because you either feel it or you don't, and there's no question as to whether it's easy or hard because it just happens.

    I find it very hard to go beyond tit-for-tat, i.e. someone loves me so I love that person. Doesn't make sense though that the reason I love someone is just because that person loves me, especially considering that this doesn't even hold true for all the people who give me love.
     
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