INFJS and Dogs
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I am naturally wary of large dogs. I don't leave a large dog alone with my toddler.
Carry something with you when you walk or something that makes you feel more protected. Learn to defend yourself, examine your fears, and face them with courage.
Welcome to the world of being a woman; we are constantly looking over our shoulders at night, parking in well lit areas, and carrying mace as I'm generally physically much weaker than half of the population. Dogs are the least of my problemz.
Carry something with you when you walk or something that makes you feel more protected. Learn to defend yourself, examine your fears, and face them with courage.
Welcome to the world of being a woman; we are constantly looking over our shoulders at night, parking in well lit areas, and carrying mace as I'm generally physically much weaker than half of the population. Dogs are the least of my problemz.
Animals can be dangerous, but like 5-10% of them.
The rest are just totally awesome and really enjoyable.
I like all animals. I own cats because they're not too much effort but provide endless entertainment. I think dogs are great too but too much effort (for me) to look after them. I have enough to do without taking one for a shit twice a day.
I think your hatred stems from negative experiences and messages recieved from your parents as a child. As you've given examples of both of those things happening to you.
Also, dog (and some cat) behaviour is rarely learned from bitch/dog it's usually from the owners. Terriers are more excitable. Retrievers retrieve. German Shepard dogs guard. But a good owner makes the dog understand what is acceptable and when. If you're poking around a house at 3am with a German Shepard in it.. You're sortve asking for trouble.
Stop dicking about in his territory in the dark you BASTARD! Mum and dad live there too.
The rest are just totally awesome and really enjoyable.
I like all animals. I own cats because they're not too much effort but provide endless entertainment. I think dogs are great too but too much effort (for me) to look after them. I have enough to do without taking one for a shit twice a day.
I think your hatred stems from negative experiences and messages recieved from your parents as a child. As you've given examples of both of those things happening to you.
Also, dog (and some cat) behaviour is rarely learned from bitch/dog it's usually from the owners. Terriers are more excitable. Retrievers retrieve. German Shepard dogs guard. But a good owner makes the dog understand what is acceptable and when. If you're poking around a house at 3am with a German Shepard in it.. You're sortve asking for trouble.
Stop dicking about in his territory in the dark you BASTARD! Mum and dad live there too.
I like dogs...and cats...and pretty much all animals. However, liking them and living with them are two different things. I've had a variety of pets during my life, but I like having cats live with me. Dogs are great, but they're too needy for me. And, by that, I do not mean that cats don't need as much affection (because they do)...I just mean that dogs rely on you for EVERYTHING. Having a dog is like having a 2-year old human...they can't go to the bathroom by themselves, you have to feed them at regular intervals, they can't bathe themselves, etc. While I love dogs, cats just fit my life better...yes, I have to clean the litterbox, but that's about 2 minutes of effort a day. If I make sure they have food and water available, they will take care of eating when they're hungry. They bathe themselves. All I have to do is love them and play with them. It's just a preference. But just because I have two cats and no dogs doesn't mean I don't like dogs...I do...I'm just more comfortable living with cats.
First off, I'm not a "he". Secondly, I didn't say I would kill you. Thirdly, I was saying that I would beat the snot out of you in response to your saying that you would gladly kill dogs for free, not because you're supposedly scared of dogs. Knowing that you would willingly hurt a dog if you were able to without legal consequences strikes me as crazy. Serial killers often do crap like that. When ridiculous crap like that comes out of your mouth (or keyboard), expect some off color responses. BTW, "if you so much as looked at them wrong" is a figure of speech. Derp.
@Billy
Pugs are awesome. Titan is kind of dumb but he makes up for it with cuteness, sweetness, and hilarity. We had another pug named Nipper while I was growing up but she was very hyper and didn't like kids much, and she nipped at you a lot, hence the name. Just the absolute polar opposite of Titan.
We also had a Samoyed and a HUGE mastiff. Of all of them (excluding Titan), the mastiff was the sweetest. My kids were around her all of the time as babies and toddlers and she protected them like she would one of her own pups.
With the exception of the INTP and the INFP's responses, which seemed ballistic, and not exactly fully rational, I liked the more or less carefully nuanced answers to my problemz as set forth. I admit I upped the ante rather high with the dog-o-cidal rhetoric but also thought I made it clear that I wouldn't harm a dog. Some part of me would like to round up the dogs, but in general, I am not that dogged. I can live my life away from dogs. Most in this neighborhood live inside of electric fences. They come running at me (I love to walk and like to walk several hours a day) but are brought up short at the boundary. One stupid dog at the bottom of the hill used to come flying at me and my kids, and that particular dog bit the mailman once a week (or so he said). I would have liked to be a mailman if it weren't for dogs. I got enough from my stint as a newspaper boy. I suppose that rapists give males a bad name, and the small percentage of dogs that bite also give all dogs a bad name. But there are 600,000 dog bites per year in the USA alone, and these are just the bites that need medical attention and so are recorded. Some children are permanently disfigured. I did stop delivering to the house with a German shepherd. I called that family and said I would hurl their paper into their yard wrapped in plastic. I know the dog couldn't help it, because it was basically a territorial being. after I called them the family kept their dog on a tether which meant the poor thing nearly choked itself trying to get at me. I felt so bad for it, I tried to throw the paper all the way to their porch and run before the dog could get going with its fascination. After a few weeks I noticed the dog had disappeared. Maybe they gave it away. It was waking the whole neighborhood up for hours on end whenever I went by. I couldn't change the situation, I was only doing my job. I was nine years old, and wasn't much of an animal hater. I shot a bird once with a BB gun and cried for two weeks when it dropped from its perch. I don't know what to do about dogs. Initially I just wanted to see if others felt as I do. I guess not. Enjoy your dogs, people! I won't be rounding them up or absconding with them or throwing them poisoned hamburger. I will turn the other cheek. Peace! (The worst dogs were not the German shepherds but tiny little miniature terriers. They simply had no brakes or so it seemed. Their owners were really nice people, too, who saved their stamps for my collection.)
What does it feel like to live your life in constant fear of something that you shouldn't probably fear?
I wouldn't be bringing rationality into this with the cards that you have been playing so far.
It isn't very rational to put words in other peoples mouths and assume overly exaggerated meanings based on words that they didn't even say/type, but that hasn't stopped you.
I'd go as far as to say the entire premise for this thread isn't in any way rational either.
It isn't very rational to put words in other peoples mouths and assume overly exaggerated meanings based on words that they didn't even say/type, but that hasn't stopped you.
I'd go as far as to say the entire premise for this thread isn't in any way rational either.
It's understandable to be afraid of something that you had a bad experience with.
But people tend to get defensive when you wish nazi death camps on the beings that they love lol.
I hope you learn to conquer your fear.
But people tend to get defensive when you wish nazi death camps on the beings that they love lol.
I hope you learn to conquer your fear.
I've been bitten by 3 dogs in my life, to the point where they tore the flesh. Once on the back of my leg, once on my hand, and once on my ankle... It was traumatic. But I was a moron to be
1. teasing the dog
2. trying to hug a dog I didnt know
3. teasing the dog.
I dont let that ruin my relationship with them, they're animals. They react when they feel threatened, I was the human in the situation, I should have known better. Its like these people who try to hug a sleeping dog they dont know and get their face bit then call the police and have the dog put down. Theres a fuckin saying for that... "let sleeping dogs lay". It tends to be people who dont respect the animals strength and power that get bit, or people who assign human characteristics to an animal. Its a dog. Respect it for what it is.
1. teasing the dog
2. trying to hug a dog I didnt know
3. teasing the dog.
I dont let that ruin my relationship with them, they're animals. They react when they feel threatened, I was the human in the situation, I should have known better. Its like these people who try to hug a sleeping dog they dont know and get their face bit then call the police and have the dog put down. Theres a fuckin saying for that... "let sleeping dogs lay". It tends to be people who dont respect the animals strength and power that get bit, or people who assign human characteristics to an animal. Its a dog. Respect it for what it is.
I think you have to treat dogs you don't know just like people you don't know. You can't make assumptions about how they're going to react and then get pissed that you were wrong. I can't lick someone's face and then be upset that they slapped me.
I do think that people who were raised with dogs have an unfair advantage in that they probably all had moments, even with dogs that were entirely sweet and wonderful and protective, where they learned about the boundaries required when dealing with them. It may not always take getting bit to get the point across, but long-term exposure to dogs lets you understand their language pretty well (if you're paying attention, I guess). Once you've got that, you stop seeing aggressive dogs as menaces to society and start recognizing the triggers (or the long-term treatment that has caused them to respond in such exaggerated ways).
They're wonderful and I love them, but they're animals who don't communicate with a human kind of verbal language. It requires care. (The same is true to remember about people, really. Even though they have words, clear understanding/communication is not a given.)
I do think that people who were raised with dogs have an unfair advantage in that they probably all had moments, even with dogs that were entirely sweet and wonderful and protective, where they learned about the boundaries required when dealing with them. It may not always take getting bit to get the point across, but long-term exposure to dogs lets you understand their language pretty well (if you're paying attention, I guess). Once you've got that, you stop seeing aggressive dogs as menaces to society and start recognizing the triggers (or the long-term treatment that has caused them to respond in such exaggerated ways).
They're wonderful and I love them, but they're animals who don't communicate with a human kind of verbal language. It requires care. (The same is true to remember about people, really. Even though they have words, clear understanding/communication is not a given.)
I agree with ACD and hope you can find some peace.
Although it may seem odd to some of us, it sounds like you have some PTSD from your past and I know how irrational and unwelcome that can be and that you wish you could control it but cannot...very frustrating, I know.
I hope you can find some balance on this and, at least, learn to live with meeting a dog without it shaking you to your core.
I hope you well, problemz, and I hope you can find some peace in this over time.
I do animal foster/rescue. While I mostly work with cats, I will foster any dog that needs me. I'm also a pitbull advocate. I adore dogs! It's not an INFJ thing, though. Any personality type can like or dislike any animal. It's personal preference.
I used to feel that way about babies, though. Now I simply dislike them, instead of wanting to throw them face first into the pavement.
I used to feel that way about babies, though. Now I simply dislike them, instead of wanting to throw them face first into the pavement.
When I was about 5 or 6 I got bit on the arse by a dog. I was climbing over the fence into it's garden to see my friend
It was simply defending it territory. Like dogs do
I ran crying to my dad and the twat just laughed at me
It was simply defending it territory. Like dogs do
I ran crying to my dad and the twat just laughed at me
I like certain breeds… it also depends on the personality of the dog in question. I really don't like being barked at and it does genuinely piss me off, especially if you feel like they're singling you out… and I swear to god that some dogs actually do single me out, even though I try to be nice to them.
I HATE German Shepherds… I guess they're sort of one of those dogs where you have to prove yourself or whatever, and I have been able to make some degree of peace with one in the past… but I've had far too many instances where they've made me afraid to walk home. I actually made eye contact with one once and I don't think you're supposed to do that, because after that every time he saw me he started barking like a maniac and trying to get off of his leash, probably so that he could tear my throat open. I wouldn't have felt the slightest bit of remorse over killing him myself-- and part of me was dreaming about getting a baseball bat or something, letting it off of its leash, and then bashing its head it. Or maybe just shooting it. I probably would have found it to be very satisfying, like standing up to a bully… because there's really no other way to put it, this dog was bullying me in my own neighborhood. I don't think my little fight-to-the-death fantasy would have gone over well with the dog's owner and I also don't know if I would have even come out on top, but I couldn't get it out of my mind.
On the other hand, I did have a dog growing up and she was absolutely gorgeous with an incredible personality to the extent that I actually had more respect for her than a lot of people. She wasn't the brightest dog all of the time and she could be kinda moody, but she was almost always friendly and overall had a great heart.
I HATE German Shepherds… I guess they're sort of one of those dogs where you have to prove yourself or whatever, and I have been able to make some degree of peace with one in the past… but I've had far too many instances where they've made me afraid to walk home. I actually made eye contact with one once and I don't think you're supposed to do that, because after that every time he saw me he started barking like a maniac and trying to get off of his leash, probably so that he could tear my throat open. I wouldn't have felt the slightest bit of remorse over killing him myself-- and part of me was dreaming about getting a baseball bat or something, letting it off of its leash, and then bashing its head it. Or maybe just shooting it. I probably would have found it to be very satisfying, like standing up to a bully… because there's really no other way to put it, this dog was bullying me in my own neighborhood. I don't think my little fight-to-the-death fantasy would have gone over well with the dog's owner and I also don't know if I would have even come out on top, but I couldn't get it out of my mind.
On the other hand, I did have a dog growing up and she was absolutely gorgeous with an incredible personality to the extent that I actually had more respect for her than a lot of people. She wasn't the brightest dog all of the time and she could be kinda moody, but she was almost always friendly and overall had a great heart.
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I loved getting all these responses. I am also glad to hear from Apone about his homocidal rage, or wait, cyanocidal rage. And then Phenix, who says she entered this board just to assert that she feels exactly the same way I do about dogs. OMG, I can't believe there's another person like me. Dogs are a real problem for some of us. I did this test I found online to see what breed of dog would be the most likely to be my favorite. I got Boston Terrier, but the questions were assuming I wanted a dog. You had three possibilities: want a dog you can spend all day with, want a dog you can spend weekends with, want a dog you could play with for about an hour each day. How about: want a dog you never have to see, or feed, or potty train, or pet, or smell, but might enjoy helping to defend you from other people's dogs. A dog to me is something like a gun with a mind of its own and will just go off and bite people or start barking mindlessly for hours on end for next to no reason, like an alarm clock you didn't even set. I feel a bit better having gotten this off my chest. The only reason I could imagine to own a gun would be to protect myself from other gun owners. That would be the only reason I'd want a dog, too. I have never enjoyed them. Never even once. I've also never fired a gun. I can't imagine owning such a thing. I look through gun catalogues and just think: what on earth are people getting out of this? Still, I would rather take a gun for a walk than a dog. At least the gun wouldn't be barking and wouldn't poop. I can't believe we let dogs poop on our lawns, and people think it's ok to just pick up the major elements of it. They never let the dogs poop on their own lawn. It makes my entire front yard unusable for my children. I won't let them play there. How would other people like it if my children pooped in their front yards and I just cleaned it up for the most part? Don't people realize the residue from dog poop is incredibly unclean and even if they bag it they are leaving salmonella and other bacteria all over my property? What's the matter with people? I doubt if other people would even like if it my children pissed on their lawn. But people think it's normal for their dogs to defecate on my lawn. I recognize my viewpoint is a bit childish and more than a tad petulant in the eyes of others. I just feel so fed up with people and their dogs. I don't get it. However, I am trying to come to peace with this. Thank you for the dialogue. I just wish I had a rhinocerous and could walk around with a pompous air having it defecate all over other people's yards and houses. Last year a neighbor actually left a steaming pile of dog turds on my lawn and I bagged it and put it on her front porch with a note saying, I believe this is yours. She was furious. However, she now at least bags her dog's turds. My neighbors across the street were delighted with my action because they said for twenty years that lady has been leaving her dog's turds on their lawn. Don't get me started on Paris. A whole lifetime of frustration and dismay could be spent cataloguing the disappointments I felt in Paris. People say it's the City of Light. It's actually the city of dog turds everywhere you go.