INFJ stereotypes or misunderstandings . . . | INFJ Forum

INFJ stereotypes or misunderstandings . . .

Gaze

Gaze

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Sep 5, 2009
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There are threads on INFJ frustrations, and flaws, etc. But there's also quite a bit of misunderstanding of motives or intentions. I see complaints about INFJ traits or characteristics will little focus on why. Quite a few distortions of the INFJ personality being peddled.

So, let's unpeddle them . . .


Let the facts begin! :m155:
 
Raccoon Love said:
''INFJ's are all psychic freaks''
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Wyote said:
Yep. It's a fact.
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This is a fact, but also this thread is supposed to be discussing the criticisms against INFJs. Clearly being a psychic freak is a good thing. :)

Seriously though, I have known more than a few people to be freaked out (associative pun intended) by my ability to 'just know things'. I'm sure it has to do with the fact that they can't do this stuff, and the majority of them therefore believe it isn't possible. The STJs I know insist that I can't do what I do, every time I do it, and it annoys the hell out of them that I do. However, people generally are uncomfortable with things they can't understand, especially when it involves things they assumed no one could know. I've been told it feels like a violation of privacy when I know things that people are trying to hide. I suppose that can be quite invasive and unsettling.
 
I don't understand this whole "we just know things" bit... it's the only part about INFJ that I'm not 100% on.

Could you guys give some examples? Is it just like, you know how people will emotionally react to things? Because that's a talent that doesn't seem that spectacular to me...
 
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freybell said:
I don't understand this whole "we just know things" bit... it's the only part about INFJ that I'm not 100% on.

Could you guys give some examples? Is it just like, you know how people will emotionally react to things? Because that's a talent that doesn't seem that spectacular to me...
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Just to note, that this thread is more about misunderstandings about the INFJ persona, not about proof that we are or are not.
 
Res said:
Just to note, that this thread is more about misunderstandings about the INFJ persona, not about proof that we are or are not.
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I was just following the general flow of the non-conversation everyone was having. If being clairvoyant is a misunderstanding about the INFJ persona, I just wanted to discus it in more detail.
 
@ freybell:

I sometimes can actually feel some people's emotions. Some INFJ's have empathic abilities. I'm not psychic, by any means.

Some occurrences include me knowing about 2 months ahead of time that a situation will turn sour and me trying to distance myself.

I can tell what's wrong with my ISTJ friends who don't understand their own emotions. I can subtly push them to realize what's going on in their lives.

I also have a really special gift with those with special needs and those on the Autism Spectrum. 3 of my best friends have Asperger's Syndrome, and I work well with people who can't speak because i 'just know' what they want/need.
 
Is the psychic thing the only thing about INFJs which are curious? I'm sure there are other misunderstandings or misconceptions which go beyond that.

For the record, if i'm supposed to be INFJ, i guess i must have been one of those who was born without the psychic gene.
 
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Res said:
Is the psychic thing the only thing about INFJs which are curious? I'm sure there are other misunderstands or misconceptions which go beyond that.

For the record, if i'm supposed to be INFJ, i guess i must have been one of those who was born without the psychic gene.
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Same here.
 
Res said:
For the record, if i'm supposed to be INFJ, i guess i must have been one of those who was born without the psychic gene.
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I stolez it,

$5 and you can have it back.
 
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One of the most apparent misunderstandings is INFJ's are always very nice and kind people, but sometimes that's not the case. I know two in particular that are very irritable and harsh with others.
 
*looks in crystal ball*
Nope, you guys just haven't discovered your psychic abilities yet.

To stay on topic, I don't like how everyone assumes INFJs are shy and incredibly nervous all the time. I only about about half the time. (if I'm an INFJ)
 
Res said:
:m083: . . . how about $3?
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*uses Res's psychic abilities*

Look, I know you are going to try to haggle one more time, and then you are going to cave in. I also know that the abilities are worth well more than $5. So... Let's keep that price steady at $5.

Oh, and I also know about that embarassing mishap last month. It's gonna cost $10 for me to keep quiet about that!
 
NeverAmI said:
*uses Res's psychic abilities*

Look, I know you are going to try to haggle one more time, and then you are going to cave in. I also know that the abilities are worth well more than $5. So... Let's keep that price steady at $5.

Oh, and I also know about that embarassing mishap last month. It's gonna cost $10 for me to keep quiet about that!
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What mishap :m196:? *you promised you'd never tell*

Ok, fine $10. $%#@*^%

Now, back to our regularly scheduled topic . . . :D
 
eidelweiss said:
@ freybell:

I sometimes can actually feel some people's emotions. Some INFJ's have empathic abilities. I'm not psychic, by any means.

Some occurrences include me knowing about 2 months ahead of time that a situation will turn sour and me trying to distance myself.

I can tell what's wrong with my ISTJ friends who don't understand their own emotions. I can subtly push them to realize what's going on in their lives.
Click to expand...

Yup. I do a lot of this too.

Unfortunately, because I am so often intuitive / empathic... and I can't make this up... I have some friends who get really bent out of shape when I'm not full on psychic about everything... or something they were assuming I'd pick up on. I've actually had people insist "I shouldn't have to tell you." Man, that's so annoying to be in trouble over something that is completely beyond my capacity. It's like being upset with an athlete for failing to exhibit a superpower.

So to clarify (and try to re-rail the thread) these assumptions about our psychic abilities need to be clarified. We INFJs tend to be more intuitive than most. We tend to be more empathic than most. We tend to notice and pick up on things more than most. We are NOT psychics. We do not have telepathy, clairvoyance, or other forms of superhuman abilities. We're just more in tune with the 'intuitive' parts of ourselves that every human has.

We can't read your mind... though while we are talking to you, we do a really good job of picking up on subtext, and if we know you can do a pretty good job of putting the unspoken pieces together. We're also really good at picking up on what others are feeling. Some of us can 'feel' it in a vague way, but that doesn't mean we have any idea why you are feeling it.

We can't give you the winning lotto numbers... but if we have enough information, we can do really well with predicting patterns and what is most likely, even if it isn't an obvious or conventional outcome. Some of us have dreams that happen, but we have no control over what we dream about.

In other words, we're prone to moments of intuition, but they're really not under our control. It will either hit us or it won't.
 
Last Dawn said:
One of the most apparent misunderstandings is INFJ's are always very nice and kind people, but sometimes that's not the case. I know two in particular that are very irritable and harsh with others.
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I agree that maybe it's too easy to assign exclusively positive traits to the INFJ personality.

But sometimes i think being nice can be a bit overrated. Sometimes, people use niceness to take advantage of someone, which oftens makes some become quite defensive, and later on very difficult to be around, which may be the reason why they are irritable and harsh.

I think the appearance of niceness tends to get people very far. If i were to be honest the way i'd like (not intending to be mean) but attempting to be real, it would not be perceived very well, even though i may be right.

But if you're very nice and accommodating, people tend to think more positively of your personality. On the other hand, they may think you're weak or understimate you. So, it's a catch 22.
 
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