I'm afraid of my intution. | INFJ Forum

I'm afraid of my intution.

Discussion in 'The INFJ Typology' started by Satya, Mar 9, 2009.

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  1. Satya

    Satya C'est la vie
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    For a few years now my grandmother has told me I need to do less rationalizing and more listening to my intuition. However, I find that listening too much to my uninhibited intuition actually makes me physically ill. When I go into intuition mode it creates a sort of stimulation which causes my thoughts and feelings to race in a million different directions, my mind seems to begin to deteriorate at a rapid pace as I begin to lose sense of what is what, I become more and more filled with fear and anxiety as I begin to think I am losing myself in the current, and finally all that mental strain translates to fatigue, nausea, etc. within my body.

    On the other hand, if I intensely focus my intuition on a single feeling or thought, I can sometimes gain profound spiritual insight, almost like I'm listening to God. But this has a drawback as well. I might begin to obsess about a feeling or thought, introspectively analyzing it over and over as I try to attain an even better understanding of it. I've often thought of this as "ghost mode" intuition because its almost like I can sense the subjectivity of my own reality from the outside looking in. If I focus too intensely, it's like every hair on my body is standing on end and I'm entering an entirely different plane of existence. This can create a profound amount of fear within me and the sense that I'm on the verge of dying. It also creates auditory and visual hallucinations and I sense presences that just aren't there.

    Last week, more as a joke than anything else, I made some intuitive predictions for one of my friends about where his life was going. He showed up at my door a couple days ago, completely distraught, and claiming all my predictions came true. He was convinced I had some sort of psychic gift. I told him that predictions are like horoscopes and they are just vague enough that people can read their situations into them after the fact, but he is compelled to believe that my predictions were spot on and he keeps trying to get me to make more. I won't do it because it simply makes me physically and psychologically ill to do it. I mean, come on, when you are throwing up and seeing things, that means you are doing something that isn't good for you!

    Has anyone else had experiences like these? If you allow yourself, do you ever get so overwhelmed by your intuition that it starts to decay your mind with fear?
     
    #1 Satya, Mar 9, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2009
  2. the

    the Si master race.
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    So basically if you concentrate hard enough you get to see the future in exchange for vomitting all over?

    What are the winning numbers for powerball? I will make it worth your time spent vomitting, I promise.
     
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  3. OP
    Satya

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    I don't get to see the future. If I did, I would go buy myself a lottery ticket and a bottle of Pepto. What I see is how people's current behaviors are likely going to affect them in the future.

    I'm sure you do the same thing even as a sensor. For example, if you see a driver who has a habit of slamming on their brakes during the summer, then come the first slick day of winter, you would probably not be surprised when you hear they got into an accident.

    Intuition is exactly the same way, it just doesn't tell you why you know. For example, you might have had trouble getting to work on that slick day, and of all the people you know, you just know that one person is going to get into an accident. You don't remember that its because they slam on their brakes out of habit, so it just comes to you as a hunch.

    Why intuition makes me sick, I don't know.
     
  4. Faye

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    I've never done what you have, but I can see how it could make you vomit.
     
  5. Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    So you should be, intuition is nuts.
     
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  6. Bored Now

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    I know EXACTLY what you mean and it's the only reason I don't meditate because it makes my intuition go CRAZY. You can run from it but you can't hide though. It'll find you. Don't feel bad about the fear... it's just a control thing, I think. I know if I can't explain something with logic or reason I get frustrated and hostile and try to rip it a part for confounding me. Don't throw away the things the universe gives you just because you don't understand them (yet).

    Just think of it as something beyond yourself caring enough about you to give you glimpses of things outside of your rational perceptions. Its scary, but I take an odd comfort in that. For me, when my intuition gets crazy and there's a LOT of synchronicity going on... I know I'm on the path I'm suppose to be on. It's like they are little signposts telling me I'm going the right way.
     
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  7. IndigoSensor

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    I haven't gotten sick from my intuition before. However, it has stressed me out quite a few times. It causes constant insessive thinking, that is hard to turn off, most in the form of future forcasting. I just get overwhelmend, and have to take a breather.

    For short-term things though, my intuition is extremely useful. Just like getting close time-frame hunches.

    It can be a pain for me, but I use my intuition so much (too much) that I could never get rid of it. I have learned to trust it, even if I doubt it in the short-term.
     
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  8. OP
    Satya

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    Hm...maybe its just the anxiety and stress generated by my intuition that makes me sick, and not the intuition itself. Fear can really do strange things to your mind and body.
     
  9. IndigoSensor

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    Indeed I know it all to well.
     
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  10. just me

    just me GONE

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    Satya, I remember an old saying we have nothing to fear but fear itself. Reminds me of a dream my wife has had often. She sees an old friend and one of my aunts' swinging in the swing. Both of these people were dear to her, but they have both passed away. They start motioning for her to come over to the swing and sit with them in the swing. My wife is scared and wakes up each time. She stays nauseated and sick more than most people I know.
    I had a dream recently and woke as I was having this amazing feeling like nothing ever imagined, but the feeling started by feeling like I was swinging. That doggone alarm clock! I could feel the feeling as I was reaching for the alarm clock, but had to focus to turn it off; that is when the feeling left me.
    I have no fear of dying, but that should not be interpreted as wanting to die or not wanting to live; I do not fear death. My wife most likely feels differently. I would sit in the swing. I took the hands of a young lady the other night in my dreams and it was like she was showing me what true bliss felt like. I can see where that may make someone feel ill, but think and feel it is more caused from fear than from anything else.
    Did the fear come along with this when all this started, or did it come after the ill feelings? Happy Birthday!
     
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  11. sumone

    sumone down the rabbit hole

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    Yes Satya, not always but often enough I will get a sick and fearful feeling.
     
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  12. Milon

    Milon Director of Glomps
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    I'll disclaimer my post my saying that as I child I tried to be ISTJ instead of INFJ. This means I learned to ignore and bury my intuition, and it's pretty weak as a result.

    Intuition has never made me sick or ill or anything. Just like IndigoSensor, my intuition on more than one occasion has provided me with extremely accurate time-frames. (Just saying I didn't manage to quite kill it.)

    I wonder, and I think this is my intuition here, if you're getting scared because your rational side isn't used to being let go. Your rational side is trying to comprehend and process everything, and your intuition is just flashing all over the place in a horribly uncoordinated and random manner (that's how your rational mind would view it). Your rationality can't comprehend, can't control, can't do what it's used to doing. So it gets scared. If that's true, it might be useful to practice shutting off, slowing down, or ignoring your rational mind. That should help lessen the fear. Which would be a useful and beneficial outcome for you.

    <EDIT>
    That would also create a vicious cycle. If you only use your intuition minimally, and your logical mind the rest of the time, the logical mind will be more and more used to be dominant and in control. Any attempts to change this will cause it greater distress. The more you practice calming it and gradually introduce your intuition, the easier it should be to relax and allow your intuition work without your logic mind panicing.
    </EDIT>

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY SATYA! :D
     
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    #12 Milon, Mar 10, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2009
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    Satya

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    Hm...you are not the first person to make this suggestion. Months ago my family began recommending that I get back into writing and art because I was concentrating so much effort into studying. Their argument was that I was focusing on my left brain so much that my right brain had to be suffering. Over the last couple years I've substantially improved upon my rationality, but as you said, I think the downside to that is I've caused my left brain to wage war on my right brain. In fact, that would even explain the feeling of depersonalization I have when I focus intensely. To develop any sense of peace, I may have to learn how to integrate both sides of my brain.
     
  14. Milon

    Milon Director of Glomps
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    Sounds like the logic is in agreement. What's your intuition say? :lol:
     
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    Satya

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    Intuition is on board. :m200:
     
  16. Milon

    Milon Director of Glomps
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    Fun question - how do you use or activate your intuition? I ask because mine needs exercise. What does it feel like, what do you do? How does the experience present itself to you? (Feel free to split if this should be its own thread.)
     
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  17. OP
    Satya

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    I dunno. Intuition just comes naturally to me. Meditation is generally how I focus on it. I go outside and just focus on something living and listen to it. Usually its trees. I've had some pretty long and detailed conversations with trees. It's a peaceful feeling.

    My short term intuition is purely from the gut. I get that sudden feeling that something isn't quite right and I adjust.
     
  18. Milon

    Milon Director of Glomps
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    You mean I'm not the only one who talks with trees? :) Actually I only did it once... I know a couple people who do so fairly often though.
     
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  19. VH

    VH Variable Hybrid

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    This is Ne.

    This is Ni.

    My Ne is rather well developed, but it is a source of anxiety for me. Ne for me is a function of my focused emotion and selfishness. The stronger and more selfish my emotions are, the more I use my Ne. The "what ifs" that the Ne can come up with are powerful and run to all manner of places they don't need to go. The more bad things it creates as possibilities, the stronger my anxiety gets until I have no idea what is right, and cannot use my Ni.

    My Ni on the other hand is a constant source of peace and knowing. The less I consciously think about something, the more accurate the information is. When I do use this function consciously, I tend to develop some wonderful insight and understanding by allowing it to go to the truth by calming myself and letting go of my selfish trappings. This function is also what I use to tap into what I believe is God. It seems like you're doing the same, whether intending to or not. The presence of God is a powerful thing, but you have nothing to fear but being temporarily overwhelmed.

    For INFJs, Ni is our natural function while Ne is our opposing function. Our Ni is our natural state, and our Ne is generally going to trip us up badly. If anything in your Ni makes you anxious or emotional, it will likely trigger your Ne to take over, and the cascade effect can follow. Stay at peace, and if it feels like you're tapping into God, just focus on how much he loves you, which is unconditionally.
     
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    #19 VH, Mar 10, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2009
  20. OP
    Satya

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    Hm...interesting. I'll have to give that some thought. Tomorrow though. I'm off to bed.
     

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