How long should you wait before getting married? | INFJ Forum

How long should you wait before getting married?

Gaze

Gaze

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Sep 5, 2009
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How long should someone wait before getting married? Is there an ideal period of time you should be dating or in a relationship before you tie the knot?


Friendly disclaimer: This thread is not about whether or not someone should get married, etc. or the belief that marriage isn't required or necessary for a relationship.
 
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Until you can know the person well enough to know their flaws/benefits, and then know how to handle them in case something happens. Once you know the consequences/benefits of a life with them, you can decide if they are right for you.


Ironically, I don't believe in allowing "love" to decide, as love is blind, and how man abusive relationships can be allowed to happen.
 
When it feels right, however long or short that takes.

My cousin got engaged three months into her freshman year in college (after 3 months of dating this guy). They got married in May and seem happy. If it feels right I guess, but what bothers me more about their timing is their age, which is a whole other subject.
 
Although it's always going to depend on the couple, and other factors, many have different opinions how long someone should be together before marrying. Some say 3 mths is ok, others say, at least 1 year to know them well enough, while others say longer. So, there are varying opinions on this.
 
middle1 said:
When it feels right, however long or short that takes.

My cousin got engaged three months into her freshman year in college (after 3 months of dating this guy). They got married in May and seem happy. If it feels right I guess, but what bothers me more about their timing is their age, which is a whole other subject.
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[MENTION=2398]middle1[/MENTION] How young is too young to get married?
 
However long feels right for you, is my opinion. My parents got married nine months after meeting each other, and my sister and her husband got engaged nine months after meeting each other.
 
Res said:
[MENTION=2398]middle1[/MENTION] How young is too young to get married?
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Well although 18 is the legal age, I strongly feel that one should wait until mid or late twenties to start settling down, if not later. I think the twenties is a time of growth and blossoming and experiencing the world and learning about yourself. I think people would be a little more prepared and responsible and ready to commit around this age.

I maybe a little bias because I got married at 21. But a lot of couples I know who have held off until mid to late twenties to settle down certainly seem more stable and commited. Of course that's not true for everyone and some younger couples may be able to handle marriage at an earlier age but I think a chance to find yourself and stablize your life before commitments would be a good foundation for a strong marriage imo.

I should also add that I was engaged after 6 months and married two years after that. And I was really unprepared for marriage, I was just in love and didn't fully grasp all the work a marriage takes. Marriage is a learning process.
 
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40 years. Minimum.
 
I know a couple who got married 3 months after meeting each other who have been married for almost 10 years now.

I also know someone who got divorced after 5 months of marriage after marrying a guy she knew for 6 years.

I really think it depends entirely on the individuals in question.
 
neptunesguns said:
I know a couple who got married 3 months after meeting each other who have been married for almost 10 years now.

I also know someone who got divorced after 5 months of marriage after marrying a guy she knew for 6 years.

I really think it depends entirely on the individuals in question.
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This.
 
Res said:
Respectful disclaimer: This thread is not about whether or not someone should get married, etc. or the belief that marriage isn't required or necessary for a relationship.
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Why would time even be a factor if some sort of hesitation weren't involved? A hesitation based on what you don't want this thread to be about.
 
Until some economic stability on both partners.
And after that, until they're emotionally ready to handle the worst.
 
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